Today we’re going to talk about some hard truths. What we’re NOT going to do… is hold hands and sing. -Sean Patrick Flanery
Fact # 1: Every single human out there wants to increase their pleasure and reduce their pain, unless, of course, there is a design flaw.
Fact # 2: I am in possession of a strategy that can ABSOLUTELY increase the pleasure and decrease the pain throughout the course of the lifetime of every single fat person out there.
I know who you are!!!
That’s right, I know exactly what drives you, motivates you, and directs your decision making. It’s called the pleasure/pain principle. Every single thing you do in your life is based upon this. And THIS… is why people are FAT!!!
Let me give you an example. You are standing in a field and there is a giant rock next to a tiny little soft puppy dog in front of you. Do you go over, pick up and hug the puppy? Of course you do! It’s a puppy dog and it’s going to lick your neck and make you feel all giddy inside!! Now, what if I told you that right behind that big rock was the same grizzly bear that ate that dude from the documentary “Grizzly Man”? (By the way, every single person out there should immediately watch that doc. It is simply genius, in a completely & wonderfully unintentional way.) The answer is, you would go nowhere near that puppy. And let me just stop all of you out there that are screaming, “yes, oh yes I would, I would DIE for that soft little puppy dog!!!!” Uh, no you wouldn’t, so just stop it & sit down.
So, what does this have to do with being a fattie? Everything. You see, sitting on that couch eating ice cream is that soft little puppy… and having diabetes or cardiac arrest at 45 is the bear that is hiding right next to the spoon.
This is what I can tell you. If you are fat and unhealthy, then your life will almost certainly contain more pain than pleasure. The tricky part is that at this point the pain is mostly out of sight, so it’s not an effective deterrent. AND, by the time you see it, it’ll be too late. You will have mortgaged your longevity for the short-term pleasure of inactivity. I can also tell you this: the pain you will feel from the sum total of hours that you will spend in a lifetime of working out will PALE by comparison to the pain endured by the diseases that it’s absence will most certainly bring on, and by the tiny little inefficiencies in your locomotion caused by your size that you don’t even notice anymore, and by the shortness of breath that just seems normal after all this time. THIS… is just a fact.
Now, for the REALLY unfortunate part: what I’ve just told you is an absolute. It is one of the divine laws of the universe and it cannot be changed. It is inviolable. If you don’t eat right and exercise, you WILL endure more pain throughout the course of a lifetime, and ultimately pay dearly. Will you postpone the pain for mild short-term pleasure if you don’t? Yes. Will the pain win in the end? Yes, without question. So, what is the recipe for prevention? …Pick one. Just about every single diet and exercise program out there works. BUT, they only work if you do them.
Now for the REALLY, REALLY unfortunate part: I’ve just told you in no uncertain terms how to increase your pleasure and decrease your pain throughout your lifetime, but only 5% of the people that need to make a change will actually do it. That’s right, only 5% of the people in the world ever actually make worthwhile goals and deliberately set out to persistently and relentlessly pursue them until they achieve them on a regular basis. These are the metrics for humanity. They have always been the metrics for humanity, and they have never waivered in any measurable amount. You cannot debate the statistics or the analytics. You CAN, however, argue that you are not one of the 95, but you cannot argue with any degree of success that the 95% doesn’t exist. It does, has, and will most likely always. BUT, I intend to try to destroy it… with your collective help. You see, I actually think that THIS rule IS violable. I think we can reprogram ourselves to maximize our gifts. I think we can recalibrate our vision to see that the long term benefits of living a healthy life will FAR outweigh the pleasure of inactivity and unhealthy habits. Simply put… I think we can do better than 5%. I think we should be ashamed of ourself… and yes, I meant for that to be singular. All we need is one person who would’ve otherwise remained on that couch, to actually get up, and start changing their future. ONE PERSON, and in the U.S. alone, we go up to 5.000000285%… and that’s a start.
It’s not good enough just to shine. No, we have to KEEP shining, until tomorrow sees us… and as we all know, tomorrow never sees what it doesn’t see too soon.
-Sean Patrick Flanery
I find it hilarious and refreshing that you are not afraid to speak your mind even if it means offending people! >.< You rock
Sean, I agree wth you with all points you have stated. I do agree that we can reprogram our minds for the better of out health and well being. No it’s never easy. There will always be challenges in life, but once you set a goal and achieve it and continue to progress; It’s the best feeling in the world. For example, I myself am anemic, I refused to take my iron and to eat healthy so my body wouldn’t crap out. I started bruising easy losing self confidence. I’d wear pants and long sleeves to hide my bruises. It hit me and I realized taking my iron and doing what I was told, benifited me in the end. I don’t bruise so easily now, I feel amazing everyday when I wake up. I love my diet and I love running. Running is just so refreshing 🙂 Off topic there sorry thought I’d share. But all in all, you are most correct and you didn’t anger me to say the least. I think its also self tolerance and sticking to the goal. Loved this post very very awesome! 🙂 I’d just like to know, you are my hero Sean. Because of you, I’m more positive than I have ever been in my life and I thank you!!! You’re mentality is beautiful and amazing. Thank you so my much, my love towards your way! 🙂
Thank you Sean for such inspiring words! I will keep them in mind and keep shining until tomorrow 🙂
Adding on! I forgot to post!! SPEAK THE TRUTH!!!! 😉 If it angers anyone than hey, truth isn’t always pleasant and it’s not something you want to hear.
Yanno Sean, since meeting you twice this year (pretty sure you dont remember but thats alright!) I’ve begun to make just the little changes in life, I was already training with a personal trainer (had to stop for a few months because of family issues but am returning next month) He’s not the best guy in the world, and he doesn’t overly motivate me, but he’s good for a laugh and helps keep my mind off my social anxiety about working out in public, so I guess it’s good. He’s got great plans and so far I’ve gotten some physical strength back and some endurance, which is great since when I started I was coming back from a severe medical issue that almost killed me. So even just a few little improvements have helped.
However since I had to stop for a few months I started to see a back slide, I’m not sleeping well, I’m not doing well in my well-being, so returning in December is going to be difficult, but i’m sure he’ll hound me till I do return. My partner and I started doing some Kale smoothies in our diet. I have a problem eating three times a day, especially breakfast. But the Kale smoothies with some great coconut milk (Trainers request) had started to curb that breakfast problem. So thats my breakfast! I have some fresh fruit with it and it’s fantastic!
But the whole point before i began to ramble was to just say Thanks. Hopefully next year when we meet again I can share the great changes that I’ll be going through. I will give you a big thank you the next time we meet.
Thank you for your honesty.
I know with 100% certainty that there will be a backlash to this post. It most certainly will not be negativity from me. You speak the truth … I know it … you know it (obviously) … and so does everyone else, especially the people who are angry at the post. They are angry and ashamed to face the truth …
P.S. Welcome back
I completely agree with you, and not because you are a celebrity. I was that “fat” person sitting on the couch, although it wasn’t ice cream I was eating. I was young and through depression had left myself get completely out of shape which of course led to more depression and pain. I was young, late 20s early 30s and felt that I was never going to get out of this rut. I looked at my family and saw that they were overweight so I though maybe it was genetic. Then one day I REALLY looked at my family. I saw all the health problems. My grandfather dying of heart congestion, my grandmother who had arthritis in every joint in her body and by her own admission, has not felt “good” for the past 40 years. I looked at my mom who too is overweight and saw how her self-esteem had deteriorated and I decided that that was NOT going to be me. I did not want to suffer the kind of misery and pain I had seen in my family the entire time I grew up. I changed right then and there. I started eating healthy and excercising. I’ve always been extremely athletic so I got into Kung Fu, I started coaching softball for the middle school where I teach, and I kept at it. I did it the right way. I didn’t use some “magical” drug or some quick fix diet. I simply started watching my calorie intake and has I started to lose inches and eventually pounds I noticed how much better I felt which just encouraged me to continue. Now I’m not going to lie, I endulge every once in a while and eat pizza or nachos but it’s a rare occurrence. Over the past year and a half to two years I’ve lost over 60 pounds and 4 pant sizes. Now when I started I was a 12/14 which in most people’s eyes is not all that abnormal but for me I was unhappy with that. I still have days where I look at myself and I’m not happy then I look back at pictures and realize how far I’ve come. Just today I ran into a former student who recently graduated high school and he said “WOW, Ms. T you look great, you’ve lost a lot of weight.” Hearing that just encourages me to keep on trucking!
Sooo true! This past year I had a complete lifestyle change, I went from a sedentary lifestyle to exercising everyday and I now feel great both mentally and physically. I can totally say before making the change I wasn’t happy but making the change had to be the best thing I’ve ever done for myself but also those who love me. Make the change people!
Why are you one of the most motivational people to me personally? It amazes me how much you care about us. For that I thank you. You inspire me every day. I can’t wait to share my progress with you & everyone on here.
thank you bb
Brilliant This! One that moment hits where the lightbulb finally goes off, everything changes for the better. Your health, your life force is the best gift one can give themselves. Thanks for the virtual kick in the arse. It only inspires us to move forward. 20 pounds down since Sept 14th. Thanks in advance for the inspiration for the next 10 down!
You speak truth, and sometimes truth hurts. I myself for a long time have ruined my life for the easy way out gaining a lot of weight, and I have been ashamed. As I walk my knees and ankles crack and pop from all the weight on them all these years… I have become angry and sick at myself for what I have done because like you have said I have no one to blame but myself…. Now to correct it I will endure the pain, and I have been. Bottom line is I don’t want to end up dead. I REF– USE to give up! I REF– USE to be apart of that 95 anymore! 68lbs down so far and I REF– USE to stop. I will not cheat and get surgery or take “diet” pills. I will use the tools that the good lord gave me and I WILL WORK FOR IT!!! Thank you for speaking the truth.
Your right. I admit I’m lazy, but not like I was. I do BJJ 4 nights a week, it’s made a difference. Right now things at work are bad, many of us may lose our jobs at the end of the year and beating the mat is the only thing that makes me happy right now. There are times that I just can’t get to class cause of the anger I’m holding over from work and I won’t bring that into class. I have lost weight, I’m a pastry chef and I have really regulated what I eat at work. I can’t let work just eat me up and have already started looking for something better, even in this economy there has to be something. But I will keep going to class cause that’s a good thing.
Firstly, thanks for another great blog entry! Second, thanks for speaking your mind…sometimes the truth hurts, and people don’t always like that. And third, I *love* this picture of you. (Sorry, had to say it.) You ROCK. Shine on!!
Sean, WOW I love that you are not afraid to speak your mind. It was about three years or so ago that I started realizing exercising was something that should be a part of my life, so I could be healthier, happier, be a better person. So I started attending a boot camp put on by the USO where my husband was stationed in Germany, there I found a love for running. Now I am more active than ever, and eat much healthier on a day to day basis…I choose to make a lifestyle change.
I know this blog is about fitness. However I wanted you to know this entry not only spoke to me about continuing on my healthy lifestyle, but the part about goals also spoke to me in regards to my business. Thank you again for speaking your mind. Til the next time….hugs
I will start to shine in all aspects of my life
I love that you speak your mind. No matter what. And hope you know you are an amazing inspiration. Thanks to you i have lost 65 lbs and feel great.Thank you!!
Sean, well said brother, well said. I entered the United States Marine Corps at age 17 with my mother’s permission. The day that I stepped onto the yellow footprints at Paris Island I considered myself to be in great shape, my theory was proven wrong. My body was pushed day in and day out for 3 long months. Not only was we broken physically, we were broken mentally, but rebuilt into a bigger better machine. Our bodies are the key to our success. I have seen recruits come into boot camp overweight and of weak mind. They leave a Marine, physically fit and capable of anything. Your body maybe physically weak to begin with but never let your mind change your course in the path that you take. Our bodies are fine tuned machines that can achieve anything once we set our minds to it. Yes, your mind is the key. I have trained numerous recruits and sat back and watch them say the words “I QUIT” the word is not in my vocabulary nor is it in any Marine vocabulary. Our phrase Pain Is Weakness Leaving The Body, is true. As humans our lives are focused on family, work, and repeating the process. For some they do not have time to go to the gym nor do they have time to work out at home after a long day at work. Do not let these things interfere with your exercise program. A half hour a day is worth putting into action instead of having spending 3 months to recover from a heart attack. Eating healthy can only do so much. You have to strive and never give up. Yes your muscles are going to ache, yes your mind is going to say you need to stop, but don’t give up. Push yourself everyday and keep setting a new goal never get content when you have reached the milestone you set in place.
Very well said on all parts Sean. I made the decision this weekend past to take back control of my life. For years my weight has seen it’s ups and downs and I’ve had enough of giving up and letting it take over. My confidence in myself got shot years ago when my weight rocketed, which made me also give up on my dreams of singing, No-one should give up on there dreams. Though every time I lose bits of weight bits of confidence come back. I’m determined that this time I’m going to do it and stick to it for no-one but myself, I deserve to be fit, healthy and happy. It’s going to be hard i have 30 maybe 35 kilos to lose, but every kilo down brings back a piece of old mixed with new me. Everyone out there with likewise thoughts/feelings should stop and re evaluate there life’s, you’ll thank yourself for it when you realise how much better it could be. x
So spectacularly honest, which is what makes you so inspiring, Sean. Thank you, as always – we’ll never be able to thank you enough, I feel =)
Thanks so much for posting this Sean.
There is no miracle cure for obesity and there is certainly no happines to be found in a diet made up of cupcakes! I’ve been very thin and quite heavy in my life and believe me when I say thinner (healthy!) is so much better! It took a lot of hard work to get my body back in shape, and I don’t regret a single sweaty exercise session or miss any of the french fries I didn’t eat. It’s about choices. I chose to get my life back. :^)
Please keep encouraging us to be better.
I have recently started my goal of being, shall we say, a more “shiny” person. After one month, I have seen and felt changes that have been wonderful. However, inspiration and dedication are needed every single day. How great to read this today! I look forward to more inspiring words from you. Thank you.
Truth. Red-eyed and glaring, fist clenched and unmovable Truth.
Thanks for once again speaking the truth Sean! I have been one of those people on the couch, and am trying my hardest to “reprogram”. After talking to you this past September at Mid-Ohio Con, I was totally inspired. I have been going to the local BJJ place in town for the past month and half, and I feel awesome when I leave. So far I’m down almost 25 pounds and have a long way to go, BUT I know I can get there now. That’s a lot more than I could say in years past. Keep speaking your mind, those of us that see the truth in it only love you more for saying it. Much love your way (to you and to the awesome Donut!).
It’s a little redundant to say you know what you’re taking about but you’ve hit the nail right on the head. After having my children 13 months apart, my youngest is 5 months and my oldest is 18 months and falling down a set of stairs during my first pregnancy, I am in pain most of the time. I put on far more weight that I would have liked due to indulging cravings and inactivity. Even though being inactive was due to the injury when I was 6 months pregnant. Now that my son is very much the typical 18 month old and I am enjoying playing with him and keeping him out of whatever impluse driven dangerous situation that inevitably comes along but the pain makes it a challenge. That coupled with tending to my 5 month old daughter who is currently nursing for 90% of her meals, I wonder what is going to work for me. I have to eat a balenced diet in order to ensure my daughter is getting the nutrition she needs and it’s not like I have the so-called luxury of being inactive when it comes to keeping my son entertained and out of harms way. It would be easier to sit and do nothing but that is not a path that I want to take. I will show my children how to live a healthy live style and lead by good example. I choose to do, not try. I will shine! Thank you for your inspiration.
Wow. True. Brutal but true. I myself have just made the decision to change my lifestyle to be more healthy. I’m lucky enough to have a friend who is willing to help guide me. I didn’t know what this site was gonna be all about when I signed up but I find myself looking forward to future posts. Inspiration to keep me motivated on my new path is always welcome. Thanks Sean!
Congrats to all that have lost weight and have met goals. I quit smoking over 3 years ago, I started working out almost 2 years ago and did a life style change in what I eat. Unfortunately the weight has not come off as I feel it should, I have lost maybe 12 pounds, yet it seems I regain and loose 5-8 of those 12 pounds over and over. I work out 3-5 times a week, Yoga, Free Weights, Walking, Strength Training, and Cardio. I have gotten discouraged at times and think what’s the use, yet I still keep on charging ahead hoping things will turn around. I don’t like sitting around and I don’t consider myself a fattie, I am just trying to figure out what I am doing wrong, I’m not going to tell you that I don’t occasionally eat UNHEALTHY, I would be lying to myself. I take supplements and vitamins daily. So I am open to any suggestions, advice, and a reality check. I don’t consider myself to be living an unhealthy or inactive lifestyle, yet there is always room for change and improvements within ourselves!!!!
Keep Shining Keep Smiling
Sean, I do agree with just about everything you said. I think some of it could have been put in nicer terms, but that’s not really your style so I’m ok with it. I am in my early 20’s and have struggled with my weight most of my life. I have genetic predispositions that made me embarrassed to do anything publicly physical growing up. That got me into some bad habits. My mom recently had a weight related health scare and it opened my eyes. I know the changes won’t be immediate and that it is a process. I figure that I need to alter my diet and increase my activity level a bit before hitting the gym. Going to the gym while eating Cheetos and Snickers isn’t going to produce results. Just by severely reducing my salt intake (due to my mom’s health scare) I am down a belt loop in about 2 weeks. Not fast progress but progress none-the-less. What people don’t realize is that small changes to your routine go a long way. Park farther away when you go to the store. Take the stairs. It all helps. I have no desire to be thin, I just want to be healthy. The goal shouldn’t be a pant or dress size, it should be being healthy whether that’s a size 2 or a size 10.
I’m curious about what way the Treadwell documentary is genius. “It is simply genius, in a completely & wonderfully unintentional way.” Please explain. Timothy was a deeply disturbed paranoid man whose lifestyle and choices alienated him from humankind and eventually cost him his life…. Oh wait… Is that it? BTW… If its a Treadwell grizzly behind the rock, go ahead and pet the puppy, The bear is dead.
I started an exercise routine & diet 3 weeks ago. It seems life has been throwing everything it can at me this week to break my will but with no luck. Today was especially bad. I’m glad I read this. Thanks.
I completely agree Sean… speaking as a fattie (I’m a good 80lbs over weight) I can honestly say, you speak the truth. Just before my 40th bday (5 yrs ago) I was experiencing alot of the pain you spoke about and had a LONG talk with myself mostly along the lines of “Hey lard ass, you’re not even 40 and your hips hurt, you can barely bend over and can’t even walk up one flight of stairs without feeling like your heart is going to explode. WTF?!” So, over the next 2 years I lost 80lbs – looked great, felt great and was on the road to losing another 20 when that damned puppy peeked around the rock and I picked it up – I got complacent,lazy, and fell out of it. Pretty soon, gained back 5 lbs… then 10… blahblahblah… gained back 50lbs in 3 years. HOLY SHIT and WTF again. I’m 45 now and though I don’t see the grizzer I know it’s there behind the rock, just like you said. Only I can fight it. And I’ve got to fight again. Even though I’m an animal lover I WILL fight it. I’ve won before, I’ll win again. 🙂 Love you man!
From where I’m standing and thats “standing” not sitting, I can say that yes what you say is harsh and can hurt some feelings, but its not something we havent heard and felt and seen before. We ALL know the truth about life and thats we NEED to take care of ourselves and each other so we can live our lives to the fullest. I myself about 6 months ago started a change in my life, I’m not going to lie, its been the hardest fucking time of my life, excuse my language. BUT! this year i was finally able to fit into my black peacoat for winter and its loose and comfy and…all that hard work has been worth it, i wont lie and say that I haven’t gone off more than a few times and been a bad girl, BUT i keep trying the next day and I have HOPE above all else that ONE day i’ll be where I wanna be. It just takes one moment, one day to be like FUCK THIS. FUCK IT! and just do it. I’m trying my best and I appreciate your input Sean and your wisdom. Now after this harsh beating…could we get a hug, or at least hold my hand for a minute?! 🙂 🙂 🙂 😉 Thanks!
Sooo….I absolutely adore you and I respect your opinion and the fact that you always seem so happy and healthy is fantastic! That being said, I in no way think it is ok to call someone a fattie. Not all people who are overweight can control it. It isn’t a matter of being lazy and eating ice cream on the couch. I follow a very strict vegetarian diet, no sugar; real or artificial, no caffeine, no alcohol. I exercise for 4 hours EVERY single day and no matter what, no matter how many hours I add to that work out regiment, I can’t lose anything. I am stuck at a size 18 with a few pudge rolls that won’t go away. I am considered a “fattie” as you so nicely put it. I have been since I was younger. I have never been above an 18, but since I was 16 years old I have never been below a size 16/18 no matter what I tried. It is especially unfortunate when my name rhymes with fat. Imagine school being pudgy with a name like Cat. Being an adult isn’t any better.
Throw in the fact I have a weak immune system and that I have had asthma since I was 2months old so I am short of breath on occasion, I am one of those fat unhealthy people. It isn’t always our choice, it isn’t always our fault. Sometimes I wish I could be one of those lazy people sitting there eating ice cream and have an actual reason for being fat and unhealthy, lol. I haven’t had ice cream since 2004.
I still adore you and respect you, but please consider some of what you say. I do understand what your trying to say, but teenagers love you and listen to what you say and there is already enough bullying in the schools. They don’t need a celebrity saying that if they are overweight they are fatties and lazy.
Love, Cattie the “Fattie”
I am sorry that you feel this way, but you are wrong. It is impossible to maintain weight if you are taking in less than you are burning. This is an irrefutable fact. In the same way that you cannot have zero money in the bank and accrue interest.
That is all true, though my body apparently doesn’t agree with irrefutable facts and this is from experience. The smallest I was ever able to get was size 16 and that was after a year and a half of only sugar free gum and breath mints for calories in school on top of hours of working out. I suppose if my body would have held on longer I would’ve gotten smaller. I see a nutritionist, and I have a personal trainer, I keep trying and I will never stop trying to lose the weight and when, hopefully it’s a when, I am able to finally get smaller without going ana again, eff yea!
If not, I am happy and confident with how I look now even if it’s not ideal for others. 🙂
You can’t lose weight by simply starving yourself. Your body will take any calories it gets and store it as fat. People also plateau in their weight loss and that’s when you need to change up your diet and your exercise. The 5 smaller meals a day was a good rule of thumb (wrist?) for me. Great book to read is: “YOU on a Diet” by Dr. Oz and Dr. Roizen. It’s not so much about dieting as it as about how your body works. I’m going to start re-reading (it’s also quite fun to read, not your dry scientific droning that causes you to lose interest) I learned a lot. And it gives some great exercise ideas (use your own body as a gym) and some delish recipes. Highly recommended. 🙂
The important thing is that you’re working toward improving your health. Someone made fun of the way you look. F**k ’em. They don’t know what you’re doing to become a healthier (and incidentally slimmer) you.
If you are truly doing everything you can, and you are truly dedicated to what you’re doing, good on you. Anyone who asks any more than that is more interested in your aesthetics than your health. And if that’s the case, please stop hanging around with such horrible people. 🙂 Do what’s right for you, not what someone else wants so you can look like an airbrushed supermodel.
I completely agree with you. Reaching a “ideal” weight does not equal healthy.
Ok. I apologize in advance to the boys because I’mma go all female for a minute. I’m totally joining an old conversation, but I just wanted to ask Cat if she’d ever been tested for Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome [PCOS]. It is a disorder that can wreak havoc on a woman. It throws your hormones all out of whack, gaining and trying to lose weight unsuccessfully – especially around your stomach – is very common. It doesn’t get much press, but it should. It will put weight on you and that puts you at risk for type II diabetes, heart disease, strokes and a whole other basket of crap. If your ovaries aren’t functioning properly because of hormones/cysts/other issues like weight it raises your risk for several different types of cancer including breast and uterine. It can also cause minor issues [well, minor in comparison] such as acne and hirsutism – because cancer and heart disease isn’t bad enough. You also might get to grow a beard. But moving on. It’s a lot more common than people believe so if you look over the symptoms and you think you might have it, get to a gynecologist like now. It’s absolutely treatable. A lot of women don’t know they have it until they have to deal with infertility. If it’s PCOS once they get you on the right medications and doses, following a sensible diet and exercise plan will help get rid of a lot of the weight. I hate to just break into a conversation, but I really wanted to mention this as a possibility. You could be suffering from something that can absolutely be managed.
How could you be ana when you have never been below size 16?????? BDM excuses.
But not everyone who is fat eats that way some are ill and some are on meds that cause extreme weight gain. Encouragement always works better than insults.
Yup, my doctor tells me this all the time. Sean, you know what you’re talking about.
it’s always best to explore all possibilities. If you’re being honest with yourself, you might want to talk to your doctor. I suggest reading this. http://thyroid.about.com/cs/dietweightloss/a/losingweight.htm
I use to complain about being active and not losing weight, I finally realized what was sabotaging my success. Still working at it. Good luck.
Hey Cat, just wanted to clarify that for me the problem was not my thyroid although I do know someone where that was the case. For me I was the problem. I was fooling myself. I wish ya luck.
Rhonda: My mum, dad, and both grandmas have thyroid problems so it is entirely possible. I don’t want to be that pudgy girl blaming it on my thyroid though. I know how people see and judge that statement. I am going to keep trying with the diet and exercise, I will discuss it with my nutritionist and trainer though. :/
Cat, don’t worry so much about what others think. Screw them. If you are working towards a healthier you, where’s the fault in that? Even if you do have a thyroid condition, that does not let you off the hook.
this also crossed my mind. thyroid imbalance can totally be a major factor for weight problems. cause thyroid hormones are responsible for our metabolism. it is REALLY important that u get yours checked out if it runs in the family. if you treat your thyroid problems(if you do have them) it can totally change everything. that’s what happened to oprah. this comes from a ‘hypothyroid'(slow metabolism), just had total thyroidectomy last july. im fortunate enough that im still too young for my metabolism to actually slow down…good luck and stay healthy!
I have an underactive thyroid (diagnosed in 2001), and it’s completely manageable IF you’re doing what you should be doing. So, you’re right that too many people use that as an excuse when it should be an explanation. The difference there is that an excuse is used to justify and alleviate guilt for exerting little to no effort to fix the problem while an explanation is used to formulate an effective resolution. Excuses are worthless, but explanations are essential. You can’t effectively resolve a problem if you don’t have a thorough understanding of the factor(s) causing it.
Plus, if you have a thyroid condition (or any other condition that can contribute to or outright cause obesity), it needs to be treated, for the sake of your health. In such instances, obesity (which is dangerous, in and of itself, as Sean so clearly described) often isn’t the ONLY detriment being done to your body by whatever’s causing it.
Nice!! I’ve been down on my workouts for like 1.5 weeks, and needed a kick in the butt like this to ratchet them up!! Tomorrows workout is going to Rock!! Thanks, man!! 🙂
There’s no anger here, Sean, only gratitude. I’ve already let you know that I’m no longer fat, and I feel great! I’m trying to help others as well and find myself quoting you. Really wish I could print this out and hand it to my patients. Maybe I’ll just post it in the employee break room. Thanks again, Sean, and have a great rest of the week.
DAMN!!! I wish I had read this about an hour earlier. I would’ve thrown the chips out instead of eating practically the whole bag during my own little pity party. Great reminder that I alone control whether or not I’ll succeed in my weight loss journey and happiness in life in general. It’s my own fault that I became fat and now it’s up to me to get off my ass and do something about it.
Sometimes you bring tears to my eyes, Sean. My father chose that warm puppy dog and he never saw that grizzly bear coming. And he died of cardiac arrest at age 45, just like what you wrote. People always think it won’t happen to them. WRONG. It can and it will. That’s a fact. Believe me, I know. Unless said person makes the changes necessary, the changes you write about.
I’ve made changes myself and I’m healthier now than I’ve ever been in my life, even though I still have a bit more weight to lose. But I’m getting there. And I will succeed. I intend to shine brilliantly for many years to come.
I’m so glad your blogs are back, Sean. Your candor and inspiration were sorely missed. You’re a man who knows what he’s talking about. I hope people hear your heartfelt words.
I’m going to respond to this with a story of a person that is really close to me. January of this year this began a journey like no other. This person faced health issues. ie bad hips, breast issues as well as high blood pressure. One day a simple phone call changed things, Someone supported her in her journey whom she least expected. Her husband. However he didnt candy coat and called her fat. Fuck off were the first words that came to mind but it wasnt that F word that hurt the most. It was when he called her fat. Truth was she was. The reminder was getting the next size up in jeans. She had been through rape and abuse as a child and young adult, been involved in gangs a regular hellian. Then she remembered a little oriental man pulling her off the streets and training her in the martial arts just because he believed in her. This made her happy. The fact she laid out a guy who turned out to be a serial rapest the day she recieved her black belt was icing on the cake. She decided to rethink things. Reading blogs about martial arts and getting healthy. She was told to pick one thing she liked about herself before this journey. Tears flowed and cuss words insued. Then it hit her. Her breasts were her favorite things. The fact she still have them. They didnt look perfect because of the lump removal but hey they were still there. Then things happened. I really admire people that can do this. 45lbs down. Yes the health issues are still there minus the high blood pressure but things are looking up. She is my best friend in the whole word. My best friend? It’s ME!
Yes… it is you.
you are the voice in my head I listen to. thank you for your words of wisdom, your guidance, your truth, your inspiration, your divine mind. because if you eat what you have always eaten, you will weigh what you’ve always weighed. i’m in the process of changing for the better. for this, I thank you. and those two little words do not seem enough for all you do. God Bless
I appreciate what you’re saying, but there really is no need to call people “fatties.” Just “fat” will do. Cutsie little insults, like the ones we all heard in high school, really don’t help get the message across.
It is just that… fat. What should I call it? Pleasantly plump? No…it’s fat. This blog is not politically correct, it is FACTUALLY correct.
As I said, just “fat” will do. “Fat people” would work fine. Fatties is like “tubby” or “lard ass” or “blubber.” It just does nothing to serve the message. It’s something a bully would call a fat kid in junior high school. No need for it. You usually are a straight shooter; no need for hurtful digs. Fat people know they’re fat. They don’t need to be ridiculed.
Do they? Do fat people know they’re fat? I would certainly like to think so, but studies suggest otherwise. Unfortunately, recognition of being overweight usually starts at the obese level, WELL above just being “overweight”.
Yes, I believe fat people are well aware of the fact they are fat, but not always willing to accept responsibility for it. That doesn’t mean that they aren’t painfully aware of the fact that they are fat or that they aren’t miserable every time they look in the mirror. It’s not an easy thing to accept or to deal with, so most people avoid it thinking that they can’t change it. But they do know it.
Well, the ones that DO know it are statistical outliers.
Great blog post Sean! You are such an inspiration to so many. Ever since I started reading your stuff, I’ve lost 45 lbs and it was hard but I have no regrets. I don’t feel like I’ve given up anything at all. Instead I’m excited at every stage and can’t wait for the next step.
I’m so proud of you girlie! Keep up the great work. =)
Thank you! I’ve been a bit behind cause of the move, but surprisingly had not gained anything. I guess running up and down 3 flights of stairs all the time, does help!
You are the hotter version of Richard Simmons!
OK. This made me laugh so hard for some reason. Now I keep hearing Sean’s words with Richard Simmon’s voice.
Some of the replies on here that I have read are basically about Sean’s choice of words. First of all he spoke his mind, and it grabbed your attention. The cold hard truth is there, people you need to listen to it. Whether you are out of shape, or obese that is the question that you need to ask yourself. This young man has given you the motivation to get yourself into a program in order to avoid a bleak and short life. You can try to refute the facts all day long but the statistics are there to back it up. You could sugar coat it anyway you want but the truth is if you know your out of shape and overweight then why get upset over a choice of a few words. In my personal opinion if I was in the shoes of the person that got offended by the style of writing in this blog then I would not sit back and write a rebuttal about the words used, instead I would be trying to better my body and be a light unto others so you can shine in the world.
I wrote my rebuttal to his choice of words and my reply to you using my phone as I jog on the treadmill. Just throwing that out there.
The main reason I find the choice of words mean and I told him in my comment that I respect his opinion, is that teenagers will read this and as helpful as he is trying to be, that one “fattie” kid could read it and it could be the point of no return for them. Everyone has a tipping point and a kid bullied for their weight seeing their favorite actor or someone they look up to call people fat or fattie it could be the thing that causes them to commit suicide. There are statistics to back up that as well.
It’s not a matter of “sugar coating” it when you talk to people with respect instead of throwing insults at them. Are you okay with people calling a diabetic who has had a foot amputated “Stumpy”? I mean, it’s the diabetic’s fault for not taking better care of him or herself, so it’s okay to use rude words to refer to them instead of speaking about them like a human being, right? To say we should just ignore the times when people use insults to belittle others is unacceptable. If you can’t get your message across by being respectful – honest, but respectful – then your message is not worth listening to.
You don’t have to sugar coat anything. You also don’t have to drop napalm on it.
Anger is always the first reaction… then realization… then acknowledgment… THEN correction. If it takes harsh words that will lose a couple friends, but save a couple lives, then I’m willing to lose them. Group hugging won’t solve the worlds obesity problem, and neither will lying about what it actually is.
That’s the same BS excuse that abusers give after they’ve beaten the shit out of their wives or children. “I had to teach them a lesson.” Being disrespectful to people is not teaching them a lesson. It is not “tough love.” A fat person’s name is not “Fattie.” You’d never talk to your mother that way (and if you did, I hope she’d knock the shit out of you). THIS is how you get people to change their behavior: “Listen, I care about you. You are fat. You need to lose weight for the sake of your health.” THIS is how you do NOT get people to change their behavior: “Hey fattie, you’re awfully fat, fattie. Stop being such a fattie.” If you can’t treat strangers with the same respect you’d treat your mother, you’re not qualified to be the “expert” on this topic that you think you are.
Another paragraph of excuses.
No, that was a paragraph of not doing any celebrity ass-kissing. There are no excuses in that paragraph about why people are fat. There was nothing in there saying “well you just don’t realize that fat people are fat for a variety of reasons.” It was, however, a clear condemnation of your crappy attitude toward fat people. Not “fatties.” Fat PEOPLE.
I’m sorry that this blog wasn’t the group hug that you expected, but I think you’re getting hung up on one specific word and missing the actual point of the piece. I’ll make no apologies for my words, and will most likely use the same ones that you despise again and again. Feel free to skip my future blogs if they get you as emotionally worked up as this one did, because they most certainly won’t get soft & cuddly.
Wait, you open by accusing Sean of using the same “BS excuse” that abusers give when they’ve “beaten the shit out of their wives or children” to “teach them a lesson”, but then go on to say that if Sean ever talked to his mother this way, you hope she “knocked the shit out of” him? What, to “teach him a lesson”? Hypocrite, much? The difference between the behavior of an abuser and what Sean has done in this blog is quite simple: abusive behavior is intended to make the target feel weaker, dumber, uglier, inferior, etc so that they can feel stronger, smarter, prettier, superior — choose your insecurity — it’s all about them, not their victims. Their victims are mostly irrelevant considerations to their own needs and drives, and when you’re on the receiving end of their abuse, you can feel them trying to break you down so they can feel more powerful than they actually are. But Sean’s intent here is clearly to motivate and EMPOWER people to take control of their own health to improve it and ultimately the quality of their lives, which is something an abuser would NEVER do. And empowerment starts with (1) recognizing and accepting where you are going wrong and it’s consequences with unadorned truth and (2) owning your responsibility in it completely. Focusing attention on his semantics rather than the message by attacking him is counterproductive and helps no one. Except to maybe make you feel better by venting your spleen instead of acknowledging the truth in what he said…behavior that is far more in line with that of an abuser than anything Sean wrote here.
I have read all of Sean’s blogs and, while the initial bluntness first made my offense button ding, once I came down off my PC horse I realized the message for what it is. Yup, I am fat, a fattie, a crip, etc. Been there, done that. Instead of getting pissed about the language, I got pissed because I was willing to not take initiative to stop making myself a target. That was fifty pounds ago and I still have 80 to lose. I have muscular dystrophy and will not use that as my excuse either. As for the reference of an abuser, well, I have survived damn near getting killed by my ex husband’s abuse and I can tell you that as a comparison, there is NO correlation.
Jodi, I am appalled that you would compare an excuse made by my husband after beating me unconscious to Sean calling me fat! My first husband broke my nose, blacked my eye and knocked out 2 teeth and said it was my fault; I asked what he had been doing all day. Sean called me fat, which I am and which is my fault. How do you compare these two things? I am not offended when Sean uses what I consider tough love to motivate me to be a healthier, happier person. It is the same method I use on my teenagers when I stop bailing them out of the same stupid decision over and over and make them face up to it. However, I was VERY offended when the man who stood before God and promised to love and care for me beat me unmercifully and then blamed it on me. It angers me that you would place these two totally different subjects in the same ballpark when they are obviously not even in the same sport. Anyone who has suffered domestic abuse would be offended by your comparison.
And to Sean, I love your blogs, they usually come along right about the time I’m getting lazy and make me get off my ass and get busy. Thanks
Caught the irony of that, did you? Do you honestly think calling someone “fattie” is intended to make them feel pretty? Really? Calling someone “fattie” is not intended to make them feel ugly or stupid? I think it’s a great point that Sean made that I was “hung up” on one particular word and missed the point of the message (which I didn’t). That’s what happens when you use insults instead of respectful language – people miss the message.
Yes, we all caught the “irony”… long before you did, I’m afraid.
It wasn’t ironic — it was hypocritical. And I don’t think the goal behind his choice of words was about people’s “feelings”. Our feelings are useful only insofar as they foster understanding of our behavior and decisions so that we can modify said behavior and decisions as needed. I could be wrong but I don’t get the idea that he’s all that concerned with people’s feelings for their own sake — he seems more concerned with their actions and how destructive vs. constructive they are. If people who are destroying themselves don’t feel badly about doing so, they won’t ever change their behavior. Why would they? And you got hung up on his word choice and “missed” the message because it’s more comfortable to attack the messenger than it is to accept the hard, unpleasant truths he’s delivering — which circles back nicely to the point of his post: people seek pleasure and avoid pain, but when they do so in a short-term, immediate-gratification manner, it usually causes destructive rather than constructive behavior. So, the real irony is that you kind of made one of his points for him.
Seriously if you really don’t like his blogs then don’t subscribe to this site, simple as that. Bitching at him is not going to make him change. We may not all agree on the same things, but dragging this out is going to go no where.
May I ask, do you also post reviews on Amazon about Harry Potter saying you hated it because you didn’t want to read a book about wizards? It was clearly stated in the first paragraph that this was not a place for PC language, and Sean’s reputation is that of someone who does not sugarcoat. You can’t bash someone for giving you exactly what they say they’re going to give you, especially since you sought it out…unless of course someone has a gun to your head forcing you to read this blog and dole out comments comparing harsh critiques to domestic abuse (it’s not at all comparable, by the way).
Total agreement Sean. Always call it the way it needs to be called. If the United States Marine Corps allowed Mothers of America to get involved in our training we would be sending more boys in uniforms back home in a box. Everyone wants things to either be given to them or for a nice gentle approach about it. We were trained hard and yes we were called names but it angered us and made us strive to achieve. The problem is not your choice in words, its society where everyone wants to either scream unfair, and point fingers instead of accepting blame for their own self. I for one will continue your support keep posting your blogs and this Marine will keep reading.
The fact remains that the whole point of this blog is to get peoples attentuon. Of course it will piss you off. Im not saying Im going to totally agree with everything but everyone has there opinion as long as it is based on FACT. The fact of the matter is the majority of overweight people are like the because of there one personal choice not because of mental, medication or medical issues. I myself can state this as fact because I could have choose alchohol. I could have refused help as an anorexic teen. I could have stayed fat and had high blood pressure and who know where else that would lead but I had a husband who cared. He called me fat. Ok yes it pissed me off but lets face it people are complacent, FACT, So whine that Sean called you a fattie if you want, It got your attention didnt it? Hopefully for the better, He really does give a shit really.
I’ll be that person to screw the curve in my country!
I’ll be the person to screw the curve in my country.
As always The Truth Hurts. Though I’ve never really considered myself “Fat”, I feel that in your eyes I would be. Which in a strange way motivates me to be…”Better”… in one way or another. Your words are Indeed harsh at times but it works for me so….Thank You.
sean gives tough love…that’s it…period…i think he cares so much that’s why this seems to be IN YOUR FACE…
I agree with you, though not completely 😉 I was underweight many years ago, from not eating at all, and that’s just as dangerous as overweight. It’s not just the “fat” people that live unhealthy, those are just the easy target ones. A lot of people, myself included, need to change their lifestyle and way of dealing with food. It’s a truth for people of any size.
Hey Sean, I did´nt understand every word cause my english is not perfect, I´m Austrian and I´m one of those people you talking about…. But…. I can´t agree you in every single word…. cause I know that I´m overweight…. but it´s not because of sitting on the couch and heaving icecream…. my obsession is to cook… and I cook every single day… fresh…. for my family…. and we even have a lot of vegetables salats and so on… we only eat meat twice a week… but the reason why I´m fat is, I enjoy eating…. I don´t like junkfood or something like this…. I´m fat because I like and enjoy it…. and you will laught… but in my life there is no pain… no pain because of eating…. Every day I´m outside with my horse and my childrens, we go swimming or hiking in the mountains…. and I´m a very positive person…. everybody (friends, family ect) loves me cause I spread so much positive energie. I love the way I am…. thats me. My friends always say Barbee we can´t imagine how you look if you where tiny… 🙂 Okay there are people outside there who are more fat than me…. and yes it is not healthy being fat… you are damn right, but I think not every single fattie is unhappy or ill….. I think if we spread more love… the world will be much better and happier.. and in a better mood 🙂 …. in that way I wish you all the best love hugs and kisses yours Barbee…. and respect to you for that blog… thats why we like /love you… you speak out what you think…. thats good :*
That is the one picture of you that I wouldnt want to shoot at!! Formally dressed, I would let you come with places looking like that!! 😉 beats the slit in the neck tee-shirts with sun glasses hanging in the front,… Yes, you wear stuff like that (a lot), it’s just the Texan in you.
Thank you for your inspiring words! I love that you speak your mind and that you are not afraid of it! It’s really important to being healthy! I have so much respect for the people who lost weight ‘nd have a healthy lifestyle now! Cause it’s not a easy thing!
‘nd like you said we have to keep shining and never stop shining!
Oh yeah my dear, it is so easy to say all those people are fat because of “the puppy”.
Of course there are people who just enjoy eating and therefore are getting fat BUT Mr. Flanery… are you always that superficial? Didnt you ever get the idea that there are reasons why people eat? Psychological reasons.
Some people eat to set off a loss, try to handle a bad childhood, abusement or just aren’t able to handle the treatment of the society nowadays. People ARE weak. Most of them. And there are much more people who have psychological problems than you think. On the other hand there are the anorexic ones. Are they better? Or people who cut themselves, people who drink, take drugs?
These are diseases. You cant just stop drinking, snuffing drugs, harming yourself or starving. You need help for that and its the same thing with eating. Just saying: “Leave the fuckin puppy because there’s a bear” doesnt work! Most of the fat people know that. (Maybe not in Texas, but in Europe they do^^)
And I didnt mention the people who really try to slim but cant… because of diseases or a bad metabolism. Of course this is just a tiny amount but they are there.
It is so easy to say people are fat because they eat too much. They just have to eat a salad a day instead of whatever and then everything will be fine. If you really think that, I am sorry but then you are stupid. Have you ever been fat or overweight? No? Then you dont have a fuckin clue what you are talking about.
I am sorry to say that cause I like you as an actor but obvieously that’s it. Shiny face but nothin in head.
Excuses. Nothing but excuses.
This is ridiculous. Of course there are people who got fat just because they eat to much, but to say all overweight people are the same and that diseases are nothing but excuses is simply poor. Some of those people don’t even have the financial possibility to get the help they’d need. They have no other choice to live, and no matter what they do, they can’t change it. Your opinion might be right in SOME ways, but it’s also wrong in so many more.
What if your mother, father or a close friend was this sick, and JUST sick, with no way out? Would you think the same then? But just wait a little more, maybe you’ll wake up some day and see, that you gained a lot of weight just like that. Remember, everytime you point your finger at someone, four other fingers will point back at you.
Ignorance. Nothing but ignorance.
Allie, all you just did was give excuse after excuse. You show your ignorance like crazy with swearing and misspelled words. Go back to school, sweetie. Or read a book.
Uuuuh sorry girl that I am from Germany and English is NOT my native language. Try to write german and we can talk about that stupid issue. This is not the point and you dont have to defend Mr. Flanery’s opinion.
Didnt understand anything I am talking about, eh? But that doesnt matter cause your lovely hero is always right and people with an other opinion are not. Just a hint: use your brain. ^^
I have no excuses! I’ve lost a lot of weight in the last six months and improved my eating and my health so no excuses needed here but I still found name calling insulting if a man were to walk up to any of these women on the street and use the words you have she would knock him in the teeth but because its you they think its ok. Its never ok to insult a person not matter what the reason or who you are. You know I have adored you for years but I don’t believe that you would talk this way if you had respect. For these women. XX
She spelled obviously wrong too… 🙂
This is still a litany of blahblahblah in these responses of people who will talk the talk in order to agree with you, but that’s about it. And I still think you’re holding something back. All that acrimony can’t just be about health and fitness. As a writer, and someone who works in the mental health field, it’s probably not great that I tend to translate most people’s subtexts in what they write. Good deed or not, their was another driving force here. But I’m not mad at what your core issue tried to address – even if it read mean spirited a little.
Those people in Europe don’t even know how to feed their dogs in proportion. Actually, even their dogs have obesity problems, but it’s not the dogs fault. Poor dogs get health problems and rack up the vet bills, but it takes the owner taking responsibility for the pet and making changes for the health and weight of the dog to get better.
Being obese and not taking care or responsibility for oneself is quite literally, “glutton” for punishment! Don’t make excuses, either you care about yourself or you don’t. I only feel sorry for the overweight dogs that are at their handlers care and improperly taken care of, they can all wear halos, but people do need to realize they have to care and dedicate themselves to making a difference in whatever it is that’s “weighing” them down.
I hope Sean uses some other word people don’t like, just to watch people lose their shit. People can overcome ALMOST anything. I smoked 18 years, quit cold turkey.. the only way to go. Stopped doing drugs (not cold turkey). People live through mutiple deaths of loved ones. What is worse than that? I worked out like crazy when I was young. I was in great shape and looked and felt really good. I used pregnacy as a reason for getting fat. I became a fattie, (stayed that way for a long time) I became vegetarian, which made me really watch what I was eating. I lost 35lbs. I wasn’t even trying. So I started walking, then yoga. I have had set backs, car accident (neck surgery) Kidney cancer. Sets you back with your exercising, but I haven’t gained any weight. I need to lose 20 more lbs. My problem now is not eating enough. You have to eat to lose weight. I have to up the exercise again. Now that I am back on my feet, it’s up to me to get it done. Exercise is nature’s anti-depressant. The more you do…the better you feel. If people can come back from war missing body parts, and we just lived through a hurricaine…you can live through a person saying “fattie”. It’s a word. I have been called worse. People always say, “do you think I want to be fat”? It’s a disease, an addiction…yes and you can overcome that. People get sober, 400lb people lose weight, the pain of death gets easier. It may take years, but it can be done. Anything can be done. You have to want it bad enough. believe me you are stronger than you think.
Not everyone with a “problem” has to find outside assistance to get better. You make a choice and then live with it. After being high almost every day for 6 years on cocaine, I quit cold. Clean for 8 years now. I wanted a better life and did everything to have one. It can be done, if you want it bad enough.
Our society pampers a ‘victim mentality’ – offering all kinds of excuses/treatments and bullshit self help seminars to those who refuse to take a good look in the mirror and change. No matter if it concerns addictions (drugs, food, cigarette’s …), diseases or the inability to get out of a bad situation: it starts with the mindset –> stop defending the victim in you that feels ‘offended all the time’.
I found my bear, Sean. And it’s celiac disease. I can never have anything with gluten again. In the best case, I am getting healthy, losing weight, healing; in the worst, I actively destroy my body… with a twix and cheeseburger (one fun ER visit later). I didn’t have the energy or life to do anything before the diagnosis. Now, I’ve lost already over 50lbs and am talking of getting off meds. I’m working on healing broken bones and absorbing vitamins, building my body, so I can go back to volunteering at a farm and then taking aerial classes, possibly joining a mma club. Stuff I want to do. Fitness and exercise is work, but it should never feel like a chore. I’ll be honest. I’m having a hard time coping with this though. I AM angry. My whole life is changing, and there are days I don’t care if it’s for the better. I don’t want to have celiac disease. This is new, and I’m struggling. However, I’m not ever going to just give up. Healthy isn’t an option; it’s everything.
Sean, I think what I loved most about this blog post is that it’s true about so much more than just physical fitness. There aren’t too many areas of life where the message of this post couldn’t be applied.
Thanks for the smile, short-lived as it was…I’ve got a 4-mile run ahead of me and it’s freaking cold out there! I’m just going to keep chanting the words “Endorphins are my friend” to get through it. See ya!
not sure if this is the right place for what I want to say, but here goes. Last Saturday night, I was given a beating by my so called best friend of 20 years. all because I stood my ground in MY own home. Then, her and her daughter locked us out of our home, and squatted until easily 11 am Sunday. I could have called the police, and I still can. We have documented very well, her masterpiece all over my body. But, I have to really know for sure, if that is what I want. And I don’t know. I DON’T know, because is it revenge, now? Or for the right reasons? I am very proud of the beating I took, because I know why I took it. And my wounds I am wearing with pride.. Maybe I should not be, I don’t know.. I just don’t know. I am lost, confused, hurt, betrayed.. All of the above and so much more.. I don’t know where to draw the line here, except that I will have nothing to do with either of them, ever again. And aside from, anything can happen to anyone, anywhere at anytime, I am not even sure what the lesson here is…I have never been a fighter.. I wouldn’t know the first thing about fighting. I am just so lost, and so confused… any advice, or words of wisdom will be greatly appreciated.
You need to call the police. You were assaulted and it needs to be documented. Perhaps take some self defense classes in the future (BJJ?????). You’re not alone. Saying prayers for you.
The more I read, the more I realize how WAAY off I was for my two posts… I have been following Sean on twitter for sometime now, so I know a lot of what he is talking about. Everyone makes good points…Insults don’t help, nor does sugar coating… Some people really just can’t see past their own noses… I have never been overweight myself, and I can NOT ever possibly understand the struggles overweight people go through.. BUT that does not make me insensitive… However, I don’t need to know that struggle in order to know “STRUGGLE”.. That is also not why I am here… I am here because if I have learned anything over the past few days, it is this… NO ONE IS RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR PROBLEMS OR ISSUES.. If you are obese, then you have to be responsible for it.. this does not mean other people didn’t help it along… But there was a day, when you may have finally realized you hate this.. Whether you were abused your whole lives, or just didn’t think or care.. you realized it one day… People need to take ownership of their own lives… ALL of us do.. Those that have maybe we will resent for awhile.. Maybe even forever… I look at people everyday, and wonder why I can’t just say “fuck it” like they do… my problems are mine, and it doesn’t mean no one can help.. But I HAVE TO TAKE OWNERSHIP of my life.. I have to be responsible for my own shit.. I can’t blame anyone, but me… And same for obese people… I may once again be way off topic with this post.. But for what I have just finished reading, it makes sense to me… If I have offended anyone then you got my point…. If you follow me on twitter and would like to unfollow you may know me as @iwritedumbshit or Iplaywithdolls… I am only sharing that, because I am tired of hiding… Oh yeah, and the dolls are dead.. PEACE!
A to the fucking men.
The excuses fat (and I am in that group by a mile, so that’s the only reason I’m using them as an example) people use are long and storied. My schedule is so crazy, I have to scarf something down whenever I get the chance. I need to stay up and write a paper, that’s why I’m freebasing the sugary sodas. I have 60 hour workweek and household chores, I’m too tired to exercise. Blah blah blah. My schedule’s not the one who gets winded walking up a flight of stairs, I am. My paper doesn’t have to avoid certain rides at the carnival with my nephew, I do. My excuses didn’t accumulate a pile of belly fat over almost thirty years, I did. Now, I’m lucky. I’m young(ish) and I have a long life ahead of me if I get out of those bad habits. And quite frankly, discovering Sean’s first blog through his twitter was when I started getting serious about weight loss. Because bullshit is seductive. I can spoonfeed myself a large load of crap and I’ll buy it because it’s what I want to hear and I’m also very convincing. Being regularly reminded that I’m spewing crap steels me enough to ignore the voice in my head that wants to stay on the couch and makes me do the workout I promised myself for the day. And it reminds me who will pay the price for buying into the BS in the end. Not society. Not my excuses. Not my family.
I’m just really here for the drama.
No, seriously. What really pisses me off is people who get offended for another people. There’s a bunch of y’all in here too, thin people getting all worked up about someone calling us fatties fatties. Why? Most of us are very capable of sticking up for ourselves and if need be, sitting on people and squishing them.
‘Sides, face it, the vast majority (yes, vast majority, v-a-s-t) of fat people are fat because of reasons Sean said, not because they have illnesses. (mind you, Flanery, there are legitimate reasons for people being overweight, no matter how hard you claim it’s not true, and trust me, arguing about this with me will get you knee-deep in shit. 😀 )
And just because y’all need to know, I’m a fattie (yes, gasp, a fattie, not a fat person) and working hard-ish to shed some of my extra chunk.
Once again, Sean, you don’t hold back. I’ve decided to make myself a goal to lose 30 lbs by May. I’m going to TX Frightmare in May and when I take a picture with Clark, you will notice a much slimmer girl, then the one you met in Austin. I want to be healthier and happier if not for myself, then for my sons.
I appreciate the article and encouragment. I’m a baby boomer who developed fibromyalgia in my early 30’s when I was a healthy weight and used to work out regularly but have slowed down over the years as the fibro worsened. Now, a few years ago I developed disk problems in my lower back which together with the fibro keeps me in pain most of the time. The weight has gradually been going up. Add to that, the flat feet I was born with have started to give trouble after doing treadmill regularly and I am in an PTTD brace. I seem constantly caught between trying to exercise and not wanting to make the pain worse and just generally discouraged. I’ve read so many articles encouraging weight loss, exercise and diet but none that really addresses people with physical limitations and/or chronic pain. That would also be much appreciated. I would love to do martial arts even at my age. LOL I’ll keep reading. Thank you.
You and I have a lot of the same problems so I thought I would let you know that I have had a lot of success with working out in the pool. Not swimming laps much but more treading water with moves like cross-country skiing and tae kwon do moves, also working with free weights in the water. I use five-pound weights which sounds weenie but they are a lot heavier under water! I have bursitis in my shoulders as well from factory work, and the water really helps relax and takes the stress off but also supplies resistance. Just a thought…hang in there, fibro sucks because it is invisible and people don’t understand what it is like to feel like a giant walking deep-tissue bruise all the time.
Thanks Sharon. Sorry for the late reply. I appreciate the understanding and pool work out tips. Will try it. I did find the perfect modified recumbent bike for my back and it’s at home and handy and doable even when I can do little else. I know I have to keep moving.
When I first found out I had Fibromyalgia, I decided to just do things as usual but as it’s gotten worse I’ve realized I have to make modifications to be able to function more efficiently. Denial doesn’t work.
sometimes the truth hurts when I first read this, I was like…..”WTF, fucking asshole”, but then I thought about it and in some ways it makes sense. I am a person who doesn’t like to rock the boat. but in order to make some positive changes in ones life you sometimes have to. it doesn’t have to be fat people that this blog post is talking about. you can put in what ever kind of person you want to and it will still make sense. for me, im fat. I am lazy and I don’t like it, but I am the only person that can change that. thank you sean for saying what most people don’t want to hear. 🙂
I am not offended by the word fatties, I know I’m fat and I know that I need to make the choice to change that and I am making that choice NOW!
I’m a fattie. I have no problem with Sean or anyone else saying so. It’s a FACT. To those who are in such an uproar apparently the truth hurts. I have been on a ‘diet’ for over a year now. I have lost only a couple of pounds. Why? Apparently I don’t want it bad enough. I obviously have no problem with being a fattie regardless of how much I say otherwise. I could list at least 20 ‘reasons’ of why I haven’t been successful, but as Sean states those are just EXC– USES. The world is full of them. If you want the so-called positive approach where your hand is held and you are patted on the back while you cry and list your excuses — watch the Biggest Loser or anything that Richard Simmons is affiliated with — then cry and eat your pizza. Yes some people do have medical issues. But that’s a small percentage. Most people are fat because they eat horrible food in horrible amounts and sit on their ass 22 hours a day. I speak from experience. Most of those people can give you 100s of excuses of why they can’t lose weight. There’s no accountability for your actions. Own it!!
And Sean… you should have a tv show. Dr. Phil gets paid out the wazoo for telling people common sense stuff that everyone already knows. You should get in on that action.
I’m gonna go out on a limb here and not jump on the fully agree bandwagon. You’re on the right track, sure, and I love that you don’t put up with excuses, because ultimately, for many of us, that’s what they boil down to. I know this because I’ve had a plethora of them. Unfortunately, right now my excuse is one that even I am having trouble figuring out how to get around. I work full time, and I’m in law school in the evenings. I leave at 7:30am every day, some days I get home at 8:30pm, some days at 10:30pm. Then there’s dinner, family time, homework, shower, bed, and start all over. My weekends consist, in large part, of homework and studying.
So I have a great excuse – but I know that ultimately it’s just an excuse. I don’t like the fact that I weigh more now at age 33 than I did when I was 20 and 9 months pregnant. But I’m lost as to what to do.
I DON’T want the bear coming for me, Sean.
I admit I am a fattie. At first I was about to get mad, but as I read your blog you speak the truth. I know I need to do something about my weight. I go through times of really eating well and exercising, to sitting on my ass doing nothing. I can use my excuse of severe depression, but I think if I lost weight a good portion of my depression would leave. I am a mother to a 3 year old and a 1 month old. I know I need to get myself into gear and do something for me so I can be here for them for a long time.
I agree! And the sad part is I’m not part of the 5%. I have always had that luck of eating what I want and not seeing anything come of it. But deep down I know that won;t last forever! And you can even physically look skinny and not be in the best of shape. With the being said I know I have to make a change to the way I eat and my exercise habits! And definately after having this baby, because then I have even more then just myself to live for. I’m happy that there are people out there that will put the truth in your face like you! People need to hear it! Let’s start bringing up that 5%!
OK, I read this last night and was a little aggravated because I think there is some real underlying hostility here amidst you’re intention to promote good health and awareness. I am ALL FOR being healthy and myself am religious about my workout regimen, but I have the luxury of only having myself to worry about when I’m not working or whatever. I think it’s much easier to lecture people when what you do revolves around this kind of lifestyle in the first place. When you’re not working as an actor, I believe this is what you do as a totally separate other career. I admire what you do with the martial arts/BJJ, some of those positions are just (physically speaking) too ambitious IMHO, but you’ve obviously dedicated years to mastering this extremely difficult and intricate form of physical training. That said, not all people who are in the “fat” category have the money, resources or available time to make the health commitment a regular part of their life. I think/agree Americans are absolutely too overweight and there are things many could be doing to correct their lives in simple ways, but this blog seems angry to me. Being forthcoming and honest, and being a total dick when being brutally honest are two different things. I don’t think anyone wishes to (ideally) die from a heart attack at 45, but this seemed just a little too vitriolic and aggressive to the point that those who read it and fall into that “fatties” category may have felt picked on. I’ve been told by my close friends that no one knows how to be a b-tch like I do when I need to, so I am trying to say this in the most diplomatic way, but I think that if you want to attract the public to your mindset, it’s probably not the best approach by calling them schoolyards nicknames, making you sound insensitive which I do not believe you appear to be as a regular guy. Despite my annoyance at your modus here, I do have a lot of respect for you and your talent in two extremely challenging vocations (that I know of). I’m not trying be the playa hater here. But this did come off as more an irascible lecture and less a platform in which to try to promote something which ultimately benefits everyone.
I agree! And the sad part is that I’m not part of the 5%. I have always had that lluck of eating what I want and not seeing anything come of it. But deep down I know that won’t last forever! And you can even physically look skinny and not be in the best of shape. With this being said I know I have to make a change to the way I eat and my exercise habits! And definately after having this baby, because then I have even more then just myslef to live for. I’m happy that there are people out there that will put the truth in your face like you! If you don’t want to hear it, your not being forced to read this blog. People need to hear it! Let’s start bringing that 5% up!
I find it laughable that people are offended with Sean’s words. Everyone knows he is not PC and will not filter just so someone else’s delicate senses could be saved.
If you are offended by the material then why go one reading it? It’s honestly not meant for you if it doesn’t speak to you and inspire you to get a move on.
I have been overweight since having my eldest boy just shy of five years ago, this has led me into a deep depression that I battled with until today. But guess what that’s not going to be my crutch anymore! I was depressed because of the weight but did nothing but perpetuate the problem by literally feeding my depression. My saint of a husband has stuck with me through all of this and has agreed to literally kick my ass into gear as soon as we have this baby (36 weeks on rest per docs orders).
Don’t let a label of a disease stop you, there’s always ways wether a diet change or activity change can help. No need for a 100lb super model but to where you’re health is better and you just feel better.
Here’s to better health!!!
Sean, thank you. For those out there getting offended at being called a “fattie” why don’t you stop. America has a huge obesity problem, look around. Kids are getting fatter and fatter at a younger age. I’m 95 lbs overweight. I gained all my weight in college. I was 130 in high school. Heaviest weight was 240. I ate myself into diabetes type 2, high blood pressure and joint and knee problems. I was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes 3 months shy of my 21st bday. I’ll be 29 in May and I still have diabetes type 2. It doesn’t go away sitting on your ass, telling yourself tomorrow I’ll get up early and go walk, workout, whatever. It doesn’t go away stuffing your face with fast food and soda and saying I’ll be better tomorrow. I did this to myself and I’m not even 30 yet. Only I can change myself. I can get off my medication and get healthy again. It all starts with me. Have I been in a lot of pain for a lot of years? Yes I have. I want to be happy again and be the healthy, confident young woman I was in high school. So thank you Sean for slapping me straight in the face with your post. I appreciate your truth.
I call myself a fattie as well, and to be honest I prefer that than being labeled obese, or something like that, there no hiding the facts, but I have lost over 70 pounds since I started trying my best at losing 6 months ago, and it’s kicking my ass, but everyday i try to kick it right back! no harm done! 🙂
First of all, congrats on your new site. Your blog says the truth in the most straightforward way. Offending it good if you want to drive someone’s attention. I agree with every word you wrote, except for one – the pain/pleasure principle is universal for every decision made by humans and it is not districted to weight issue solely. Determination is something that one needs for every activity. Overweight is only one symptom. You can extend the scope and make the shine seen from a larger distance. I wish to thank you also personally – your inspiration helped me to save my life by getting back to shape. Not related to the overweight problem but to some other medical condition, which your shine inspired me to fight and (hopefully) to win. This is why I am speaking about extending the scope. The details are related to another blog 😉 Thank you! Shine as bright as you can!
I love you. You’re my new best friend.
I have weight problems and always have. Even as a newborn, I was 12lbs7oz. I’m only 24 years old, 5’11” and I weigh 270. THAT’S BAD.
Being a fatty is a tradition in my family. My mother, aunt and my 14 year old cousin had Gastric Bipass Surgery and one of my elder brothers and a sisters and 2 other aunts need it.
I’ve been trying to get into a healthy state of mind, but couldn’t quite find the motivation. But as I read your brutally, yet awesomely honest words as I sit here in McDonald’s, eating a #4 with Big Mac sauce, I think it was the kick in the Cheeseburger I needed to start. I don’t think I’m hungry anymore.
I’m glad you’re honest. I think we need a little more tough love. Continue being the greatest man IN THE WORLD.
Thanks Mr. Flanery. I think this is the start of something AWESOME.
Just weight (wait) and see; people will change. Sounds good, right? The truth is a lot of people don’t change their ways. They may make attempts, like sticking with eating healthy meals & exercising for a week. But a lack of quick results deters their motivation to stick with any diet plan. It’s fun and easy to say “I will.” However, people are losing sight of reaching to “I did.”
I want to live for long, long time. I’m ready to be one of those people to jump off the couch (or desk chair) & become a healthier & better me.
Q: What’s your policy on holiday weight?
I agree with everything you’ve said Sean. I am one of those ‘fat’ people. I’ve always been a hefty person, even when I was a kid. I was physically active growing up, like all the time. If I wasn’t running and playing at school, it was riding my bike all day with my friends or softball through spring and fall seasons for seven years straight. By the time I was 18 years old I weighed 180lbs (for a 5ft tall woman, that’s really bad I know) and I hated it. Depression was my friend because of it and the combination of losing my mother to kidney failure at 15, but thanks to some dear friends I decided I was going to get that weight off. We made a plan started working out and within a year I’d gone from 180lbs to 135lbs, a size 18 to a size 9. It was awesome. I met my husband shortly afterwards and had my first child in 2005, the second in 2008. Now as I near my 30th birthday thanks to bad diet, completely lack of exercise and other things I am sitting at 200lbs. It kills me, constantly makes me tired and not really wanting to do anything. My children thankfully are both healthy weights for their age and height, I strive more to make sure they eat and exercise properly than I do myself. My oldest son takes Isshinryu karate and is working towards his next belt promotion as does my husband. The youngest is preparing to start next year when he turns 5, and thanks to our wonderful Sensei he is encouraging me to join then too. To me that isn’t the beginning of my journey considering I have already started adjusting my diet, talking with my doctor about proper vitamins and supplements I can take as well as getting on the road to quitting smoking (smoked since I was 15 yrs old). I don’t let myself have excuses anymore, I have a gym that I have access too 24/7 thanks to my employer and I know the only person who can stop me from getting healthy is myself. I’m not one of those people who takes offense to the things other say, I push back. I’ve done it my whole life, tell me I can’t do something and I’ll prove you wrong. This is just one more stepping stone to a longer, healthier, happier life for myself and my family.
Thank you for being so inspiring.
Okay. So yes I agree that the word “fattie” is offensive BUT…sometimes offenses need to be made in order to get the point across. Was I offended when eight years ago my older sister violated my personal privacy by going into my room, finding my stash, reeming my little know-it-all-too-cool-teeny-bopper A$$ for it, telling me I looked like, and I quote, ” a strung out dumpster whore”, then offered to drive me to 21st S. State St. (popular area for prostitution in this state) and drop me off? HELL YES I WAS! Did I have a very strong urge to put her face through the wall she was sitting next to? HELL YES I DID! Did I? NOPE! After the seething rage, feelings of being personally violated, and betrayed by my own flesh and blood started to settle I began to take into consideration the true meaning of her words. I don’t mean just the name calling either. I mean her entire speech she gave to me in the whole three hours I was in her room of what I was becoming, how I looked, how I acted, what she went through when she used, etc. Although it was berating, greatly hurtful, and severely belittling at times, her point was made very clear. By the end of it all we both burst into tears. Together we flushed my stash and smashed my pipes in the gutter outside. My point of my story isn’t for pity. My point is listen and pay attention to THE POINT of what Sean meant. We all have our bad habits and go through pain in our lives. We all have the choice to change it. I see this blog as more of a pep talk. I may not be overweight by I DO need to get my little a$$ into shape (and quit the cigarettes) soon if I want to succeed in my goals for my future career in criminal justice (wow! who knew right? Lol!)
As usual, you’ve given me a lot to think about. I lost my molar but gained a lot of energy all in one summer. I was one of those who gained a lot of weight. If that wasn’t enough, my son was diagnosed with autism. I have two daughters that I am not going to burden with becoming full time care givers. I started to lose weigh and become more active. I feel this strong need to say in optimal shape for myself, but also for my kids. Especially my son. He’s a nine year old with zero body fat, extremely active and energetic. I want to be the one who will care for him for a very long time and my worst fear would be dying from diabetes or a heart attack or anything that could be avoided. Then what will become of him? These are the things that I have to always take into account. I know that the truth can sometimes hurt. But I also know that many times otherwise intelligent people need to be hit upside the head with cold hard honesty in order to see the truth. Thank you for your candor!
I have finally read all of these lovely responses. First, congratulations to all who have made the positive step of improving your lifestyles!! To address some others: I am not the type of person to make excuses. Hell, my life could read like a soap opera! Childhood abuse, muscular dystrophy, marital abuse, poverty…..etc. Ultimately, it is up to ME to jumpstart my health. I can use every excuse in the book, and have for a good majority of my 35 yrs, but (despite or because of) Sean’s words, I had the kick in the ass needed to take charge. My disability DOES NOT stop me from being healthy. I changed my diet and do what excercise I can. I may not be able to afford a gym membership but I can afford to get off my ass and walk around the block or walk around the table during commercials at the very least! Exercise does not have to cost a thing! Now I am lucky that I saved my pennies (mostly from not getting fast food and junk) and have a personal trainer twice a week. He pushes me, despite my disability and I have lost 50lbs. I have quite a way to go before my goal but it’s a step at a time. We are the ones to take control of our lives, don’t let circumstances do it for you!
Awesome, Terri!!!! You’re a rock star.
Thank you Jenn! Just trying to get it out that our circumstances don’t have to rule our lives.
I appreciate your candor – that is why I subscribed to your blog. I understand the whole “fattie” issue. I’ve been accused for speaking candidly about overweight (obese) people and told I was being rude. I don’t have a way of with words, such as you (and those out there with that particular gift). Anyway, here is my point: Five years ago, I was at my best – physically and spiritually. Then, a little bit of ice cream here, a missed day at the gym there…. five years later: 50 lbs gained, no muscle tone, depressed and no motivation whatsoever on getting it fixed! What is it? I don’t know…I ask myself that every day. I always say, “There is always tomorrow.” So I say to you, keep on blogging about health, physical fitness, spiritual growth etc… Do it and don’t stop. There are people out here (like me) that need to hear it. Maybe one of these days I will have the motivation and desire to get back out there and get back in the groove. Life is fighting the good fight and doing your best to encourage other people as well to join in that fight. It is never-ending, but will be rewarding at the end. Thanks, Sean.
I think people are getting way too hung up on the word “fat” or “fattie”. We have fat cells in us. Not “obese”, “overweight”, “dumpy” “weeble-wobble” cells but FAT cells. And to those making excuses or not having enough time or money to lose weight my mom lost 200+ lbs by walking the hill by our house twice a day. She couldn’t even walk to the mailbox and had to use 2 sticks to even walk there. She’d been fat since before I was adopted into the family. She did it by changing her eating habits. She made a lifestyle change and she hasn’t gained a lb back. She just turned 69 and she lost those 200+ lbs about 3 yrs ago. She did it, so why can’t I or anyone else needing to lose weight.
Sorry to chime in again but I felt I should clarify something about my weight gain and the subsequent loss.
I have a condition called “insulin resistance”. What this means is that my body is incapable of effectively digesting certain carbohydrates so stores the sugars and fats rather than processing them properly and using them for energy. (a strong precursor to Type II diabetes, heart attack and stroke!) Why it happened, we’re still not sure, but after a few years of trial and error on my doctor’s behalf to try and figure out why after being very thin for most of my life, I was suddenly gaining huge amounts of weight, my doctor came across this and immediately put me on a very carbohydrate restrictive diet. Not a high protein diet by any means, just fewer carbs well balanced with loads of veggies and lean proteins. Immediate success. I lost all the extra weight at a healthy rate of 1.5-2 lbs per week, and in a matter of a few months I lost all the weight and was back exercising and getting back in shape. I gradually reincorporated carbs back into my diet, but am very careful with the type and amount I allow myself each day. I eat tons of veggies, fruits, lean meats, beans, and limited quantities of some rice and grains. What I don’t eat is refined sugars – so no processed foods, no pop, no fast food, basically no junk food! That does not mean I don’t indulge every now and then in a big plate of nachos or pizza, or even ice cream. I do, but the next day I limit my carbs to those in fruit and veggies only. No bread, no pasta, no rice. My daily calories are anywhere from 1500 – 2000. My doctor says there is a large portion of todays population that is experiencing the same condition and that perhaps it’s a sign of the times as we are inundated with processed and “quickie” foods. For anyone struggling with their weight, I highly suggest you see your doctor and have them look into this. Living with dietary restrictions may mean you take a little extra time each day making your meals from scratch, but the trade off is that what you eat will taste better and is so much better for you! Meals made from scratch have flavour that doesn’t come from added salts and sugars. It comes from the food itself. Change doesn’t happen overnight, but it’s up to all of us to make the effort to change how we live our lives and that includes what we put in our mouths.
Thanks for the shoving us in the right direction Sean..
I didn’t really read what everyone wrote, but I do agree with you completely.While I am in no way a “fattie” I wouldn’t mind dropping some pounds but more importantly on my part getting active. My problem is I have an incurable disease that is severely painful, and the more I move, the worse the pain gets. So what kind of advice can you offer to someone like me? Who wants to do activities, who wants to join karate and kick boxing, but just going to the mall will have me in severe pain for days. Physical therapy makes the pain worse, and my father tries every new trial they come out with, and has yet to find one to lessen his pain, which I have to say is far greater than mine. So if you have any advice for someone like me who would like to both loose weight and get active, I am all ears!!! Or eyes, lol ;p
Wow! Seriously! I just have to say wow! Out of all the doctors I have seen, general and “professional” and PT doctors, not ONE has ever thought of water aerobics. I personally have never thought of it, and I LOVE water. My mother always called me a fish!!!! I spent my summers swimming in Florida as a child, and I can’t think of much I would rather do than swim. Thank you, seriously, so much for that. Maybe a ton of you thought it, but it never even entered my mind. Now I am going to find a pool nearby that I can go to on a regular basis once I have an immune system again. I am so excited!!!! Thank you again!!!! I pray that it will work! I could live in water 🙂
I heard a great analogy once. Here it is: You come into someone’s home for Thanksgiving. It’s a huge house and the feast is the best you’ve ever had. Everyone’s having a great time enjoying themselves. But you notice that a bedroom is on fire. Flames everywhere and getting closer to the people celebrating. You try to tell the host, “Hey, your house is on fire” and they respond with, “That’s horrible!!!! How could you say that?? It’s so negative!!!” All you are trying to do is help save their life and they don’t want to hear about it since they’re having such a great time in the moment. The people that truly care about what you’re saying will pay heed and the others who are so damned wrapped up in the stupid word “fattie” will continue to get fat since they don’t want to hear such negativity. Thanks for sounding the alarm! Love you to pieces.
Wish I would have read through everything and seen this, before I posted earlier.. My post had nothing to do with obesity. So apologies if it was out of place.. Now then…
My 18 year old son is 280 lbs. I have no idea how to motivate him.. I have had his blood tests done, and so far no hint of diabetes.. I am afraid for his health, and I don’t know what to do.. He was born a big boy, and we always knew he would be… Just not like this.. I have NO idea where to start with him… Suggestions, anyone?
Ask him or get a male friend to ask him what is missing in his life and why he deals with not having it by eating and therefore doing harm to himself.
Oh, Sean, you seem to have caused quite a stir. I’m not afraid to admit, I’m a fattie. Ok, not huge, but definitely not where I should be, I should be about 25 pounds lighter than I am. Thankfully, I am working on it and have lost 25 pounds in about 6 months just by changing the way I eat and making wise food choices, I know that adding more exercise to my daily life will help me get past this current plateau and help me lose the other half of my 50 pound goal! But the thing is, halfway is a good start!
Thanks for being honest and telling it like it is even if it’s harsh, people need less mollycoddling in this world and more cold, hard truth. I’m going to post a picture of a scary bear on my fridge that way I’ll be less tempted to eat crap and often reminded to go lift some weights or take a walk instead of snacking 🙂
I WILL reach my goal!
Everyone who is getting offended by this blog need to step back and take a deep breath for a moment.
First off having met Sean he is -never- cruel to any of his fans, he treats us with love and respect even the ‘fatties’ that he meets. He knows what people can be capable of and he’s right it’s not about ‘group hugs’ it’s tough-loving thats he’s trying to give. He may have never been overweight himself but if I remember correctly he knows people who have gotten severely ill from being overweight (fact check here please) he only wants whats best for his fans, and he’s trying to be a beacon of the RIGHT kind of support people need. whether or not it’s being overweight, depressed, recovering from a severe illness etc. He wants whats best.
I for one (being overweight myself and have been my whole life) appreciate his honesty. I may not have health problems NOW, but if I dont make the proper changes I will have them as I get older. You can be beautiful being a big girl but that wont last long when it comes to your health. You can be confident as an overweight person but that wont do diddly when it comes to your health. Being overweight is a major health issue and it will destroy you.
Dont read to far into his choice of words, read into the message behind him. He doesn’t have malicious intent, he has real meaning. And this isn’t ass-kissing to a celebrity talk either, I was very offended the first time i read one of this blogs awhile back, but after taking a moment to reflect on what he was honestly saying and thinking back to meeting him in the past I realized that he means it with all the love that his heart has, when you meet him for the few minutes you get he makes you feel like you matter and that can change you. So i swallowed my pride and started to make subtle changes in my life. I haven’t lost any weight yet, but i’ve begun to feel stronger, as I stated above the first time I posted. I owe alot of that motivation sadly not to my personal trainer who I feel should be like this, but to Sean’s honesty, to a strangers opinion who isn’t afraid to voice his mind. He can change people just by his words.
So stop being such children about what he says, realize that he wont sugar coat the truth, and that what he says out of love. It’s not like when you meet him he says ‘jesus your a fattie aren’t you.’
OH and the person who is comparing this to being beaten by your husband…. really? Thats physical and mental violence compared to god honest truth.
You can be proud of who you are yes, you can be confident, yeah…. but a few years down the line it’s going to be your health that matters.
I think it’s great as Sean goes out of himself and touches on this topic. some feel attacked here …. perhaps they should think about precisely what Sean trying to say. I do believe that he has notion to what healthy eating and sport is, he probably does not know what it is to be fat, but I think you’re just shocked, because you are unused to hear such words from him. no kisskiss no hugs…. no love you….. just the truth…. but dear sean…. I repeat again, I do not agree in every detail. Thx for that blog 🙂 greetings from austria yours Barbee!!! 🙂
I remember finding the “breadcrumbs” and Sean very plainly writing that this was going to piss some people off, For those who are comparing domestic violence to being called “fat” or “fattie” I am going to let you in on a little secret.. ONE HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE OTHER!!! Domestic violence is an issue that is one persons choice to inflict pain and suffering on someone else.. For whatever shitty reason they have to do so.. Being overweight and lazy is an individual choice. If you are overweight because of health issues then find the process that works for you to change this… again it is on the individual to make the change in their life that is going to prolong their days on this earth.. I am so glad that Sean made it a point to not “sugar coat” what he thinks or feels, and he has the right to say whatever because this is “HIS” blog.. Do I think it was a bit abrasive.. yes I do, but not offensive, It’s called tough love people. There was no judgement passed, just simple truth. Calling this man “stupid” and “superficial” sounded a bit like “meet me at the tree after school” type of shit… Kudos to this blog… Looking forward to the next. P.S. I think it’s safe to say Sean that you wont be getting Christmas cards from some of the people on here 😉
Overeating or improper nutrition is the overwhelming reason for being overweight. That’s not to say that it is 100 percent of the reasons and I don’t think Sean said that. Some suffer from other medical or glandular issues, but those things can also be addressed by a physician.
Overweight people simply wear on the outside what others manage to keep secret on the inside, but everyone pays eventually for poor nutrition and fitness. I like the bear behind the boulder analogy because it is exactly how life-threatening issues develop. If you are not eating properly, it doesn’t matter whether or not you carry extra weight. Two years ago, I heard of the early death of an avid athlete. He died of a heart attack brought on by poor eating habits. He may have looked healthy, but he wasn’t healthy on the inside.
The fat label belongs to everyone who doesn’t eat and/or exercise properly. Arguing with Sean over it doesn’t erase that reality.
Let me start off by saying that I’m not angry….I’m not in denial about needing to lose weight and be healthier but what I’m about to say will not be very popular considering what most of these other comments say but I’m going to say it anyways. In fact, I don’t think you will take what I’m about to say very seriously except to chalk me up to being another person that’s in denial, angry, lazy or full of excuses….think what you want but here’s my opinion:
First off, I find it interesting how someone who has more time than the average person to work out can tell everyone else how simple it is to lose weight. That you just have to want it enough to do it. You have the ability to constantly be on the move which makes you very fortunate to have such a flexible career.
Second, for someone who has never been an overweight adult you can’t fully appreciate how difficult it really is. You’ve never had a serious injury that caused you to pack on the pounds (unless there’s something I’m unaware of) or a medical condition that does or even worse, BOTH at the same time. When you do then I may take you more seriously telling me to just get up and do it. It is also a FACT that men lose weight easier and faster than women.
Third, I would NOT tolerate my significant other saying “Hey fatty, you really need to eat right and exercise otherwise you’re always going to be unhealthy and unhappy.” It’s one thing to be honest but it’s another to be condescending about it. So why should I tolerate it from anyone else?
Again….say what you will but this is NOT inspiring to me in the least. You may be hot and entertaining but I also think you are a bit full of it. Like you said….I’m not trying to be mean, I’m just being honest……
geeze. I’ve been a fan for like a minute and it’s obvious why he does it…to get you angry, so you do some deep thinking, and then change, etc.. I just can’t understand how anyone would join his blog and NOT know exactly what he is gonna say and how he’s gonna say it. Forget about the fattie, fat, obese, blubber..whatever and just get the point that fat is an epidemic (you know, like AIDS) , it’s killing us and something drastic has to be done.
Idiotic comment – fatness/obesity is NOTHING like AIDS. Could you be more lame?
Sure, I’ll do my very best.
affecting or tending to affect a disproportionately large number of individuals within a population, community, or region at the same time
The World Health Organization (WHO), “Obesity and overweight pose a major risk for serious diet-related chronic diseases, including type 2 diabetes, cardiovascular disease, hypertension and stroke, and certain forms of cancer”, a WHO fact sheet states. According to AP, experts at the conference “have warned that obesity is a bigger threat than AIDS or bird flu, and will easily overwhelm the world’s health care systems if urgent action is not taken
So I’m thinking you should go to Angola or Ethiopia (or any part of sub Saharan Africa, for that matter) and explain to them your correlation between these two diseases. Their obesity problem being on the completely opposite end of the spectrum and all. Maybe you can tell them how to eat better and still live with a deadly disease and all will be good. Have you ever seen anyone suffer from AIDS or HIV – I don’t care if you used the word “epidemic” as your excuse for your ridiculously inane comparison – your comment was moronic and completely erroneous.
Finally, some one is actually taking over weight issues seriously and not baby talking through it. This is exactly what my life needed right now. Thank you Mr. Flannery! I am a college student with a BMI of 20.1, but I have a terrible diet and do not exercise. I’m anemic and have seizures because of it. I just do not have time to take care of myself, so it seems, with 15 credit hours of school and a full time job. Thank you so much!
Wow. Lotta people rockin’ the mic today…
Sometimes to get people’s attention, you have to get in their face…you have to show them what they obliviously are not seeing… or nobody that ‘cares’ has the guts enough to come right out and say it. No. They would rather watch you sitting around at the local rib shack sucking down the ‘all you can eat buffet’…Good Lard People! Wake up! Look around you…. we are drowning in a sea of fat.
Not too long ago Mr. F. got in my face, so to speak, with one of his blog posts. Now, seven months and a lot of blood, sweat and tears later, I AM a better, stronger person physically AND mentally for it. I won’t go into specifics, it’s already history on the HBJJ blog–but I was a mess…I mean a real train wreck. And now, looking back on that conversation, it wasn’t the words but the message that struck home to me. Quite frankly, in my line of work, words are more or less weapons hurled around to and fro. (I’ve driven a school bus for 20 years now.) I already had a thick suit of armor when our paths crossed.
I don’t know Sean personally, never met him, and he probably would toss me out of his studio ten minutes into any ‘training’ class. I’m just a stubborn, questioning, and highly outspoken 48 yr old pain in the backside. Honestly I can’t understand how my instructor lasts 55 minutes twice a week with me …..bless his heart! =)
BUT, getting back–the sheer fact that here was this man, a ‘celebrity’ as some have more than made a point of reference to…using his time trying to help others. That’s a bad thing? I don’t see it. If anything, you would think one like himself would be out doing ‘Hollywood’ stuff with their time…but here he sat. Writing. I mean blog after blog after blog. And, I kept reading them… waited for them to be posted.
It didn’t take long for me to realize something. He was, nor is ever going to STOP. He will do what he has to do to get your attention. To open your eyes. He sincerely cares about the lives of other people. He wants you to live. To better yourselves. He’s even giving you tools on how to do it.
Now, after sitting here reading all the responses … all I can do is shake my head …
Look within YOURSELF. You are the only one held accountable in your life. For who you are and what you do. HOW you do it. Nobody makes you DO anything, it is a CHOICE. Everything you do is nothing but choices.
I chose to pull myself up out of the trenches. I’m not the same person I was back in April. I’ve came a long way. But, on the same token, I have only begun. Small goals met, even bigger goals to set.
The first thing told to me when I started my training was,
“You will achieve your goals, but it will be through slow and steady consistency that they will be met.”
I’ve not backed down yet–have to do a little of my own butt kicking from time to time, but blog posts like this do help with that. [ Thanks, Mr. F. =) ]
Bottom line? Do it for yourself.. and if that’s not motivation enough, then do it for those you love. Choose to LIVE!
Let not the message be lost! Sean is an inspirational, articulate, well informed, kick arse, not the Dalai Lama. All he has done is state the blindingly bloody obvious, evidentially based fact, that if you dont take good care of the body your given, that body wont last very long. Inertia and complacency in the present tends to lead to regretful hindsight in the future, in my Cardiac Nurse / Crash team member experience. Hindsight serves no one well unless its the SIGHT of your beHIND that jolts you into taking positive action. Whereas foresight and deciding to take steps in a forward direction literally, repeatedly and at a fair pace can serve you extremely well for the rest of your hopefully long and happy life. I’d like to say Sean from one life saver to another,the message is most definitely not lost on me. I too completely support your ideology and would like to say thankyou for taking the time to consider and improve the health of your nation. All power to you! Helen x
So right! I have had doctors with a bed side manner far worse than our pal here. Would it sound better coming from them? When they are delivering the cold hard truth to you, it is still going to sting. People may not like it, but that is the reality. You get busy living, or you get busy dying. And that choice is yours alone.
Very refreshing Sean! You truly never seize to amaze me. I admire your perspective and your desire/passion/respect to share these life lessons with all of us. Truly thankful! – Cassandra
My underlying reasons for getting fat are the same as yours. The first time I was molested I was 3. My birth father found my cousins molesting me & blamed me. He yelled at & called me a whore & a slut. He then paraded me out in front of the family & everyone had a great laugh about it. Even my mother. After that I made damn sure I was never around them alone again. If my parents weren’t going to protect me then I’d have to do it myself. A few years passed & I had forgotten all about what had happened. That’s when my second molester struck. These sickos have a sixth sense about children who are vulnerable. This time I didn’t fight at all. I knew I had no way of fighting back. Off & on through out the years I was abused by 9 different people. From the time I was 3 to the time I was 21. I’d always been a chubby girl but that wasn’t enough to keep them away. So subconsciously I decided to get super fat. That way no one would want to touch me. A few yrs ago I started losing weight based on a fluke. Then it got me wanting to lose weight. I’ve lost quite a bit so far but still have a ways to go. Every day is a struggle for me. Sometimes I find myself sabotaging myself to gain a little bit of weight back. I’m starting to get attention from guys & quite frankly it’s scary for me. I’m a grown ass woman & I’m afraid of men. I’m also still terrified to lose too much weight. Logically I know rape is a power thing. The little girl who was so hurt sees it differently. She sees it as people forcing themselves on her & she wants her “fat armor” back on. The trick somedays is to do my best to ignore her. To keep going to the gym. Keep eating healthy. Keep going down this new path. It’s scary most days but I know I’ll be better off in the end. If it wasn’t for Sean I don’t know that I could continue. Not only has he given encouragement but he’s also given me a way to protect myself. I’m hoping to start BJJ soon. Not only will this help me continue to lose weight but I’ll never have to worry about anyone ever touching me again unless I want to be touched. From the bottom of my heart I thank Sean every day because I know he helped to save my life. Because of him & the community that he’s built it’s given me the courage to take control back. Even my agoraphobia has lessened. It used to take me hours & hours to prepare to leave my house. It’s lessened to just a couple hours. I was also able to leave the comfort & safety of my home & meet him at a con. I wanted to tell him how much he’s changed me but I wussed out. Guess this is kind of my way of saying thank you to him. Also thank you to you for sharing your story because I don’t think I’d have shared mine if you hadn’t opened the door.
I read your blog today Sean while I was snacking at my office desk. Read a few of the posts as well – some really positive in praising your words, and some I would consider angry, or defensive in response to your “truth”. I would like to share my thoughts if you will, and give you my truth. I’m not going to blow smoke up your ass and praise you in attempts to gain your attention or favour – you don’t need it Sean. Rather, I’m hoping that maybe one person who takes the time to read this may learn something from it. If those who are defensive by what you said, and the truth of your words doesn’t wake them up, then maybe what I have to say will.
Changing what something is called, doesn’t change what it is. I can call myself “plump” or maybe
the PC “plus-size”, even “fluffy” – but at the end of the day I’m still fat. I see it every day
when I stand before the bathroom mirror. I am reminded when I walk by windows and catch my reflection. I live with it as I overhear the words, “such a pretty girl, a shame she can’t lose a few pounds”. Yes, it sucks being fat. I know that now. I didn’t always though. Not too long ago I wore these extra fluffy layers like a suit of armour. Armour to protect myself. Armour that made me invisible so I could disappear. Armour that would prevent me from ever being hurt again. Armour that deflected words like plump and chunky away from another word. Rape.
Changing what something is called, doesn’t change what it is. Sexual assault is what the authorities like to call it in Canada. Again, doesn’t matter what an ugly word is called, the results or images are the same. The scars are the same. The pain is the same. I close my eyes, and I can replay the attack in my mind just like it was a scene out of a movie-of-the-week starring a much different me. A me that was fit, that believed that bad things only happened to bad people, and that my home was a place of safety. That’s right, I was fit. I was a gym rat, that walked with confidence and felt I was able to take on the world. I have never been a raging beauty, especially with the wild curly hair that generations of my family have inherited, but I did miraculously manage to make a few men’s heads turn. I enjoyed the attention. What woman wouldn’t?
I had just returned home from the gym, had a shower and put on pj’s my mother had given me for
Christmas the year before. My two roommates were out as they were every Tuesday night. Someone knocked at the door, and after a quick glance out the window – thinking it was some guy from an environmental group come to ask me to help save the whales – I opened the door. The next several minutes would be some of the longest of my life. I remember a hand on my throat. I remember his breath. I remember the words. You deserve this. You want this. I am going to watch you bleed. This bearded man made it clear he was there to rape and kill me. He only got half of his wish. Know that I fought back. I fought fucking hard. I screamed like a banshee. Help finally did come in the form of my attackers stepfather who realized his coked up son was missing. When I hid in the bathroom, clutching the phone calling 911, I was beaten, bruised and bleeding. But so was he. When the RCMP finally arrived, it took 6 constables to take this half naked man down, and the injuries he’d sustained were one’s I’d given him. Broken nose,
a few broken ribs and he looked like he’d been scratched by one angry hellcat. But I was alive.
I went into therapy and took self-defense classes with my girlfriends, and began to heal on the outside. I thought I was doing pretty well. Then he got out of jail after 4 months with just a slap on the wrist. That’s when I hatched my plan. No, I wasn’t going to go chop his dick off, as much as I wanted to. Instead, I somehow rationalized that I had brought his attention onto myself, and that if I hadn’t gained his attention, the rape would never have occurred. Twisted right? At the time I didn’t think so. So I moved clear across country, stopped going to the gym and began to build my suit of fatty armour.
It worked. Holy shit did it work. I got the invisibility that I desired. I no longer turned mens heads. I felt in control of my life. Amazing what we can con ourselves into believing. For years I wore my armour and continued to “live”. I thought I was happy – focused on my career, thought that I was content and the hassles of dating were non-existent. I was having to buy bigger sized pants, then the next size up. And the next. My size 8’s now had a 1 in front. Mission accomplished. Invisibility achieved. No chance now of another man hurting me.
I took a job with our military, and went overseas to become a travel coordinator for our troops in Afghanistan. My friends and family thought I was brave. I survived the IED Highway, a firefight, some badly aimed rocket attacks on the Kandahar base before being transferred to what was at the time, a secret Canadian base in Dubai. It was hot as hell there. I was working 24 hour shifts. I was eating right. I was doing good work. Then something miraculous began to happen. I lost weight.
In those 6 months away, I lost 30lbs. May not seem like a lot, but I had to wear a belt on my uniform to keep my shorts on. When I returned, I re-entered therapy to work through all the emotions of having worked in a war zone. Seeing 18 caskets be unloaded from Hercs to make their final passage home to their loved ones was difficult. While working with the therapist, the
old wounds were reopened and I think I truly began to heal on the inside. But there was one problem. The outside didn’t match who I was anymore.
I was proud of the weight I had lost, and happy with my accomplishments. Key word there – happy. Forgot what that felt like. I thought I was happy eating an entire bag of Lay’s salt & vinegar chips. I thought I was happy spending my weekends at home alone. I thought I was happy as a size 18. For years I had practiced all the excuses and swore by them. They helped
keep my armour shiny. I realized I didn’t want that armour anymore, and the excuses had to end. The only thing stopping me from becoming the person I knew I was, the person that deserved to be loved, wasn’t my attacker… it was me.
Now I wish I could tell you I am now a svelt and it size 10 again. Not quite the case. Am I losing weight? Yes, slowly it is coming off. I am eating better, walking daily and working out. The weight didn’t go on overnight, and I am realistic in knowing it won’t come off overnight. I even gained some weight back after the death of my mom, but that isn’t an excuse to give up. I won’t let this fat suit of armour stop me from being the best version of me possible. I won’t let my
attacker rob me from my life any longer. I won’t let excuses be rob me of my life any longer.
Changing what something is called, doesn’t change what it is. Fat is fat. Excuses are excuses. Change is change. I know I am finally on the right path, and my armour is getting lighter. I know what the excuses are, and I probably had a pretty damn good one. I guess I am sharing this with you Sean and readers, is that I understand the pleasure/pain principle because I have lived it. I have been through pain and survived it. I know it’s time to put the effort into the pleasure of living the longest, healthiest, armour-free life I can. Yes, some words may be ugly, and they may sting, but don’t let those words stop you from getting the message behind the words. No excuses.
Your words may be tough to take for some people but they are true and I thank you for saying them Sean, sugar coating things just makes the problem worse, i’ll definately keep reading your posts 🙂
Sean, feel free to call me all the names you want if it makes me angry enough to get up off my ass and do something about it. I appreciate the motivation!
All I got is I’m fat and ugly. Ha, FML. No ciggies to take it out on, either… Guess the treadmill will have to do.
And guys, getting my first little nip/tuck after 95 lbs. lost thanks to this man, so if y’all could pretty please say a prayer for me on Dec. 17 I’d appreciate it soooo much.
Thanks & God bless! xx
of course being called fat doesn’t feel good but the truth of the matter is that we are fat. so what do you prefer him call us? id rather be called fat than obese. i myself i have been working on my weight for a couple years now and have lost 167lbs. i’m very proud of that! i’ve had to battle cervical cancer along the way and 3 different blood disorders which i am treated with chemo for them the chemo just totally drains me of all energy, always nauseated and in pain, but i try and keep on trucking lol i have 22lbs left to lose to get to my goal weight. i do believe i WILL get there thanks Sean!
Whoah there Sean, I think you struck a nerve on here : )
I think in some ways the terminology used is doing EXACTLY what it needed to do, or even maybe was meant to do (perhaps even unbeknownst to the author himself). By getting upset, by the need to engage on the issue, by rushing to defend yourself (or in some cases others)…the wheels are now in motion. In order to make the necessary changes in your life you have to first love yourself enough to do it, to want it, to taste it. I was a tiny thing when I got married and prior to having kids: two difficult pregnancies later (the first being literally minutes away from having a stroke when I delivered and becoming diabetic with my second) I certainly was not where I wanted to be. I may not be exactly where I want to be now, but I am working at it. And I don’t intend to stop. Not just in terms of the weight and how I perceive myself but in terms of wanting to make sure that I am ALWAYS here for my kids. I suffered a loss this past summer, a terrible loss. A woman that I have known for some 20 yrs, more like family than a mere friend. She had the greatest heart of anyone I have ever known, she loved everyone she ever met. The sad thing is, she never loved herself that much. She couldn’t see what she had to offer…and that took its toll on her physically. She didn’t take care of herself the way she should, the way that she took care of everyone else. She didn’t listen to her doctors, she didn’t listen to her family, she didn’t listen to her friends. Her body couldn’t take the abuse anymore, the abuse she was inflicting upon herself. In the end she left behind a devestated family, friends with more questions than answers and a very young daughter that I fear will never have any real memories of her mother. She loved us all, unfortunately she didn’t love us more than she hated herself. If Sean’s message can stop that from happening to even one person…then I say he has done his job here. It’s an admirable thing he does…a noble cause. While people might disagree with how he goes about it you have to understand…HE IS TRYING TO SAVE YOUR LIFE.
Wow Sean. Very inspiring. I’m a very active pretty healthy person but within the last year I’ve lost some motivation for working out. I’ve been trying hard to get back into shape and although I admit I really don’t have far to go, maybe 10lbs but I have to tell you reading this has given me the extra push i needed to get up and go work out and have the body and healthy lifestyle I want. Thanks for the inspiration and I look forward to your future posts.:)
You probably don’t remember, but I gave you the Superman cape in Chicago and for good reason. You signed my whitebelt and said “Don’t let me hear about you quitting.” I’m not going to quit, I’m doing this for myself and I really don’t want an earfull from you even if you really only mean the best of intentions.
Oh I remember very well.!!
Ok, ‘Fattie’ here and for no other reason except laziness. I let myself go and didn’t realize how badly until I met Norm and Sean in Louisiana earlier this year. Seeing pics of myself with those two embarrassed me. I’m working on it, sometimes not as hard as I can, but I’m working on it. There have been some false starts, but I’ll get there.
Now, the use of the word fattie offends me.But it’s supposed to. Sometimes, people need to be offended in order to act. So while I find it offensive, I don’t have a problem with it, if that makes sense.
What I do find disheartening is the idea that someone I admire so much, like Sean, might not respect me because I’ve yet to conquer my problem. 🙁
Yes, managing your diet and simply moving is obvious. Because EVERYONE says it. Sorry Sean, it’s not new information. It’s out there. All over the place. It has been for a VERY long time. And it doesn’t work. Not for anyone more than 50-60 pounds overweight. Otherwise there wouldn’t be anyone more than 50-60 pounds overweight.
Signed someone who is eating less, moving more (5+ hours/week) and is still more than 100 pounds overweight for the second time in her life.
Well, then you didn’t reduce your intake enough… and you’re still not MOVING enough. This is not subjective.
And it’s not that freaking simple. Gah. How much weight have you ever lost? I lost 120 pounds the first time. And it didn’t make anything better. Not one freaking thing. Every time I reduce my caloric intake I fall asleep at work. At home. Behind the wheel. Nobody expects me to be holding down a job but it won’t be much longer if I go to my boss and tell her she needs to cut my hours because a person who has never ever ever been in the same boat as me thinks I’m not trying hard enough. (and doesn’t give any credence to counseling but then nobody does, which is why this method is overly simplistic, to be polite)
Tell you what. Since you seem to have time we don’t, strap on 100 pounds (minimum) any way you want – fat suit, weight packs, whatever – work an 8-hour job for five days and work out for each of those five day and film it. THEN I will consider you some kind of guru.
Excuses. You just don’t want it badly enough.
And you’re delusional and dangerous.
and that is exactly it!! people will obtain what they want if they reach for it! but that is the main problem with not seeing results…people dont want it badly enough, so they dont try. Ex- got a friend who’s about 55-65lbs overweight…works at a greyhound race track, job 1 run after putting dogs into the box or 2 sit and wait with the dogs, he wants to lose weight he says, very badly, hes a very good guy, but always voulnteers to sit and wait, never wants to do the running/jogging and he rarely ever dose it, maybe once every two weeks…somebody always takes his place. just one example of saying but not wanting.
Food, the real stuff, can be miraculous when the right ones are taken in and the wrong ones left out. For example, I became anemic during pregnancy and have since been, but I can control it by eating foods with iron. Becoming a blood donor encouraged me to keep my diet up and it benefits me. PLUS, high iron foods give you energy. Eating a raw cucumber can take away a headache, carrots can help indigestion, there’s plenty of foods that will help heal our bodies in all conditions. Before having to need by pass surgery, it could have been easier to “by pass” the sweets, fast foods, and wrong foods. Keep trying, find the right things and then don’t quit! To give up on yourself is to care less about yourself which is of no benefit to anyone. You want a miracle? Pray for one. Try what I call “perimeter shopping” … It’s shopping on the perimeter of the grocery store. I get fresh produce, dairy, fresh bread, and meats all in the perimeter of a store. The isles are full of temptations so I avoid them. 🙂 try and keep trying and set your mind to it, and you can do it!
I’m not looking for a miracle. Too much has happened. I like cucumbers, raw peas fresh from the shell, corn and, unfortunately, potatoes. But I can only eat them when I am not working (along with a lot of varieties of fruit) because 45-60 minutes later I usually have to make a hurried and painful visit to the restroom and I can’t afford that while I’m working. I’ve been trying to find a way to eat them and have them stay with me to actually reap the benefit, but no doctor will help me solve the problem because they don’t believe I’m even trying to eat vegetables.
At the start of my weight loss I was over 200 lbs overweight. Yep, weighed in at 345lbs. Reducing my caloric intake to 1500 cal a day and training (45min of circuit training on weight machines twice a week, pedaling a bike or walking for thirty min the rest of the weeki) helped me lose 50lbs and I am still losing. I have 80 more to go to my initial goal. As I lose, my caloric intake decreases because I need less to run my body. I will never go below 1250 as that would be unhealthy but I will be able to increase my exercise by then as my strength and endurance increases. It does work for those who are more than 50-60lbs overweight
Good grief, did everyone miss the part where I said I work out a minimum of five hours a week? I love doing it. I have no problem going. I miss it when I can’t. I try to replace it with something else, but that requires I overdose on ibuprofen at least 3 times a week to manage the associated pain. Don’t take that much? Sure, I can use the mute button on my phone when the stabbing pains of the migraine overtake me or when I have to scream or try to stop crying when my legs seizes up. I try to shake it off without medicating. What do you people want, the medical records from the time I was treated for a groin pull after working out with regular athletic people? I am so tired at the end of the day the only thing I can do is sleep and it takes a herculean will to get out of bed in the morning to go to my workout, but I do. You are one person Terri and you’ve found something that works for you, and I applaud you. But you cannot say that what you do is going to do the same for me that it did for you. And you can’t say what I’m doing isn’t eventually going to work for me. If I can keep going. Right now I am still standing. Now matter how many times the sledgehammer that is life bashes me. I missed my workout today so I could find out whether the stroke I had in my eye on News Years Day 2011 will cause long-term blindness. I will miss my workout tomorrow because I have to go to the local cancer hospital so my oncologist can tell me whether or not we have successfully murdered my uterus. And I will probably cry all the way home and remind myself 14 times that I never wanted kids and probably couldn’t support them anyway, pass out from being so emotionally drained, wake up in the morning, suck it up yet again and try and make it through the day.
I was not making the statement that what has worked for me is going to work for you or that your methods are wrong. I was merely addressing the part of your statement that said “And it doesn’t work. Not for anyone more than 50-60 pounds overweight. Otherwise there wouldn’t be anyone more than 50-60 pounds overweight. Signed someone who is eating less, moving more (5+ hours/week) and is still more than 100 pounds overweight for the second time in her life.” Again, just stating that it does work for someone grossly overweight such as myself. I am no stranger to medical issues. In my post further up I briefly gloss on my issues. I was born with Muscular Dystrophy. I wear braces from the knee down on both legs that keep my feet at ninety degree angles just so I can walk. Without them, I don’t walk. MD isn’t painless, it’s just the opposite. I have days where I can’t even wipe my own ass. I also can’t have children, due to the MD and the damage I took during an abusive marriage. I am in no way saying health issues don’t add an element of hardship to exercise. I wish you well in your health and your weight loss.
Found out today I have dropped 80 pounds in the last three months.
What everyone seems to forget is that there are three basic body types :Ectomorph, Mesomorph and Endomorph.
Here are typical traits of each:
An ectomorph is a typical skinny guy. Ecto’s have a light build with small joints and lean muscle. Usually ectomorph’s have long thin limbs with stringy muscles. Shoulders tend to be thin with little width.
Typical traits of an ectomorph:
• Small “delicate” frame and bone structure
• Classic “hardgainer”
• Small shoulders
• Lean muscle mass
• Finds it hard to gain weight
• Fast metabolism
Ectomorphs find it very hard to gain weight. They have a fast metabolism which burns up calories very quickly. Ecto’s need a huge amount of calories in order to gain weight. Workouts should be short and intense focusing on big muscle groups. Supplements are definitely recommended. Ectomorphs should eat before bed to prevent muscle catabolism during the night. Generally, ectomorphs can lose fat very easily which makes cutting back to lean muscle easier for them.
A mesomorph has a large bone structure, large muscles and a naturally athletic physique. Mesomorphs are the best body type for bodybuilding. They find it quite easy to gain and lose weight. They are naturally strong which is the perfect platform for building muscle.
Typical traits on a Mesomorph:
• Generally hard body
• Well defined muscles
• Rectangular shaped body
• Gains muscle easily
• Gains fat more easily than ectomorphs
The mesomorph body type responds the best to weight training. Gains are usually seen very quickly, especially for beginners. The downside to mesomorphs is they gain fat more easily than ectomorphs. This means they must watch their calorie intake. Usually a combination of weight training and cardio works best for mesomorphs.
The endomorph body type is solid and generally soft. Endomorphs gain fat very easily. Endo’s are usually of a shorter build with thick arms and legs. Muscles are strong, especially the upper legs. Endomorphs find they are naturally strong in leg exercises like the squat.
Typical traits of an Endomorph:
• Soft and round body
• Gains muscle and fat very easily
• Is generally short
• Round physique
• Finds it hard to lose fat
• Slow metabolism
•Muscles not so well defined
When it comes to training endomorphs find it very easy to gain weight. Unfortunately, a large portion of this weight is fat not muscle. To keep fat gain to a minimum, endomorphs must always train cardio as well as weights. Usually supplements may not be needed as long as the person has a high protein intake in their diet.
(and why yes, I DID just copy and paste that!)
See, we are not all meant to be the super-skinny, tall, big-boobed models our televisions slam our brains with every day. We are all different and unique. I think the main point made in this blog is that every one should 1. Love themselves and 2. do so enough to extend that life and the quality of it.
Everyone has a different body type, life, circimstances, etc. – but it’s no excuse not to love and honor the body and Life that God gave us. And we certainly are not doing that by sitting on our sofa’s and stuffing Dorito’s in our pie-holes! Do what you can to live a clean and healthy life, and love yourself and those around you enough to WANT to do everything that you can to extend it!
There’s people with more than 60 lbs. of overweight not because it can’t be done, but because we love food and hate exercise.
I weighed twice what I should in the beginning of March this year, but who wants that? Nobody. So I started eating right, which doesn’t necessarily mean eat less. My problem was that I could go the whole day with 2 starbucks frapps, and a giant chocolate chip cookie. I didn’t eat a lot, I just ate crap. Just follow a balanced diet, and you’ll lose weight. No exercise needed, but probably plastic surgery later (my case, for being a lazy butt) to get rid of all the excess skin.
Please don’t call someone who wants the best for the people that love him “dangerous”. I didn’t get it until I started getting a great response from people complementing on my weightloss. Try it! “El que no arriesga, no gana”.
Yeya, he’s aggressively preaching a plan that has universally failed for years. Do you think there would be an obesity problem if just exercising and eating right actually worked?
The plan is there, obese people just don’t put it into action. I was 95 lbs. heavier before Sean, because I had a poor diet and I’d have rather circle parking lots at school or stores 25 times than to have to park far away and walk– If the plan didn’t work, 100% of the world would be obese. Now if he cares or not that I’ve lost how ever much I’ve lost, it doesn’t matter, haha in my head he does, and that’s what keeps me moving. I saw you wrote you lost 120 lbs. “the first time”, and that is a common mistake, to think of it as something you have to get through in order to reach a goal. It’s not just a plan, it’s a lifestyle change. It took me 6 years of being twice my size to realize it. Granted, I’m still very much obese, I’m not stopping, I’m pushing further.
If you feel like you have some extra lbs. to lose, just keep in mind it’s not just dieting/exercising to get to that weight, but balancing out candybars with exercise in order to MAINTAIN the weight once you’re there.
Definitely NOT easy, I’m nowhere near my goal weight but I can already tell you it’s completely worth it!
Don’t rule it out just yet 🙂
And Yeya, you look great, by the way!!! Now STOP SMOKING!!
“Do you think there would be an obesity problem if just exercising and eating right actually worked?”
Kerri, It DOES work when done properly. It’s a fact whether or not you choose to accept it. Instead of fighting it, EMBRACE it. I did and I couldn’t be happier. Stop making excuses and start making changes to live the life you deserve.
You said you realized you lost 80lbs in the last three months after a claim of eating right and exercising 5+ hours a week, but now you are claiming that there is an obesity epidemic because eating and exercising is not enough…Didn’t you just contradict yourself?
Caitlin – you assume I ate what you all consider right. I ate what I wanted. Just in smaller portions.
And Caitlin, to shed over 100 pounds and maintain it requires a change in food habits, a change in exercise habits, and COUNSELING. This is what pisses me off about Sean’s my way or the highway aggressiveness and how flippantly you all throw around the word “excuses.” The fact I was raped by two different men as a child and once more by someone new in my 30s when I tried to start dating is a FACT. It is also a documented FACT that many obese woman who’ve gained weight have done it to protect themselves from continued negative attention. Do you want us all to just suck it up and tether ourselves to a treadmill or do you think we might understand our eating habits better if we talked to a professional about them?
” …to shed over 100 pounds and maintain it requires a change in food habits, a change in exercise habits, and COUNSELING.”
You are absolutely right about the first two parts of that statement, but the third I have to call BS. I’m not afraid to be proven wrong, so if you would be able to provide any credible source out there that indicates that in order for someone to lose 100lbs, or any set amount of weight for the matter, requires Counseling, please share it.
Sean’s not doing “My Way or the Highway”. He’s simply doing “The Way”. Eat less crap and move more. That’s the big “secret”. I lost my access weight well before Sean started his health blogs. I can attest to the message he’s sending out based on results.
While I feel very deeply for your personal situation, I feel the point of discussion is being overseen. The point is, the way to lose any amount of weight requires eating right and moving more. Choosing to purposely gain weight is self-sabotage. If you can openly suggest talking to a professional to understand your eating habits kinda indicates you already know what is causing it and have the choice to continue to self-sabotage or decide you ARE worth taking care of.
Caitlin – I wrote lose and MAINTAIN.
“David revealed that his slide back into an unhealthy lifestyle was because he could not come to terms with this newly-slim self, and though he had been outwardly thriving, he was struggling within.
‘I wasn’t doing too well. I looked really good on the outside, but inside I was a terrible mess,’ he said.
‘All my life I was this monster in my head and all of a sudden, to be this good looking guy, it blew my mind away. I didn’t know how to deal with it.’
And gaining over 100 pounds isn’t self-sabotage. It’s suicide.
Kerri- I’m sending up my white flag on this particular topic, because this is going around in circles. I just want to say that I wish you all the best in everything you do. Just always know you are deserve the best and know you are worth taking care of. If in your opinion that means needing Counseling, I’d recommend seeking it. Whatever it takes to get you to the happiness and healthy life you deserve. God Bless!
*You are deserving of the best…*
It’s not just about eating less. It’s also about what you eat. It’s so easy just to run into the store and find the quickest thing to eat. Even things like Healthy Choice aren’t that healthy. Most of those convenient food are loaded with bad stuff. Flip the box over & take a look at the chart. Fresh food might take more time to make but in the end it’s worth it. Think of your body as a high performance car. Would you put diesel fuel in a high performance car? No you wouldn’t. So why are you doing that to your body. Take some time & do research on food & how the right combinations can actually help you lose weight.
I see your point and I thank you for it. If other people do not see it well then that is on them.
Please keep it up. 🙂 I really like the new blog.
OK listen up folks! I weighed in at 462.6 lbs!!! I couldn’t weigh on the scale at the dr office. I had to go to the ‘special’ scale in the hospital that went above 350 ok. SO I AM A FATTIE!! But here is the kicker, I realized that society wasn’t the problem I was. I didn’t care. I didn’t give a shizz if I was 462 or 162. I didn’t love nor respect myself. I had type II diabetes, hypertension, arthritus you name it, I ran the gammit. I hated myself because of being so fat. UNTIL *DING (lightbulb moment) If I took control of my eatting habits if I took control and got off my arse and exercised I may feel better! Guess what happened? I felt better than I ever felt before. I began to walk 1/2 mile then 1 mile then two miles a day! Then like magic *poof* I lost 160 lbs my diabetes is under control no meds and I can weigh on the scale in the dr office, hell I can weigh at home now! Am I where I need to be Nope not yet! but that is the key isn’t it not to give up but to strive and shine (stole it sorry :D) everyday and try to be a better ME! I l LOVE ME and I’ll be damned if I don’t fight to keep me around a while longer. So don’t get mad at the messagner look at yourself and work on it. DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Welcome to the 5%… we’ve been waiting!!! God bless, and congratulations!!!!
Thank you and it feels damn good too! God bless you and keep up the blog. It is important.
Thanks for a great message! I was diagnosed with RA and spinal stenosis in 1998 and I STILL make every attempt to lead a healthy life. Even when the pain gets me down – I get off my kiester and take a slow walk around the block a couple of times. It doesn’t take that much effort – it’s just a matter of mentle discipline (and that is the hardest part). If I can keep my weight down, anyone can at least make the effort. Thanks for the awsome blog!
Great Job Kelly and Lacretia!!!!!
This blog was blunt, harsh, straight foward, and mean to probably many people, but to me it was truth, inspirational, great, and i very much appreciate this blog like a lot! In my opinion, I believe it is essiential to be straight foward and be blunt about the truth rather than sugar coat the truth because how are you supposed to actually get the message or point across about the truth if you are basically saying what people want to hear by sugar coating? All sugar coating dose is make people feel better or “not that bad” about themselves for their wrong doings. Where as being blunt actually makes them think about their wrong doing and actually try and change it around because they feel bad or ashamed about themselves. The reason why Sean Patrick Flanery posts these blogs are to help his fans, and if Sean really dose appreciate and love his fans (which i dont doubt it), then all he is doing is helping US out by telling the truth and giving some advice and in my opinion some very inspirational words. He is not hating or disliking any of his fans, but its the fans who are getting all worked up because honestly..they cant handle the hard truth. I can, 20lbs overweight, used to be 50lbs overweight, but i took action because i couldnt stand my reflection and now i lost 30lbs. haha trust me im still a “fatttie, fat ass” but at least im doing something about it, (can run 3 mi, actually do pull-ups, push-ups, sit-ups,etc… but before couldnt do a single pull up or push up!!! yeah thats fucking ridiculous) and will continue to lose this weight and will do my best to keep that shit off. People…have respect for Sean, he’s willing to lose fans to help out for a much bigger cause (he shouldnt lose fans because that is simply ridiculous) and that cause is…well…The U.S.A is the fattest country in the world. Thanks Sean for these blogs, all they do is inspire me, and i hope you never get soft on any of your future blog posts!
After reading your blog last night, and having all of today to ponder things, I have come to the self-realization that even though I have been traversing out of the 95% and into that coveted 5% I have not done so whole heartedly. I may have made significant changes this year, but they are not nearly enough.
I will need to treat getting off the couch with the same aggression and resolve as I did getting off cocaine. I was high effectively every day for six years. One day, I made the decision to quit and I beat that devil with a big stick. I quit cold turkey, moved apartments, changed my phone number and I stopped hanging with the “party” friends. I have been clean for 8 years now.
So, if I can bring myself back from the brink of self-destruction and rebuild my life, I should be more than capable of getting off my ass and be more active. Not for vanity, but for a better life, a better me. For a long time I didn’t care about ME. Didn’t care about much of anything, just went through life on autopilot. It was within the past 3 years that I have begun to CARE again. With my mom surviving breast cancer in 2011 and both my grandmothers passing within the past few years, I realized life really is PRECIOUS.
I have to agree completely with your assessment of my problem. Laziness, and bad eating habits have made me fat, unhealthy and I suffer from arthritis and bulging discs, bad knees and now it turns out I have bone spurs on both heels. My foot had been bothering me for a while, but I simply chose to ignore it, until I couldn’t anymore. Not being able to participate in yoga and Tae Kwon Do for me is not acceptable. This past month, not going to TKD and going other activites like going for a walk has made me moody, depressed even. However, I needed to let my foot heal.
I am now making better food choices with smaller portions. I am taking your advice and will be juicing as soon as my Ninja Mega Kitchen System arrives next week and I have a heavy bag coming my way as well. I should be back in TKD in a week or so and I looking forward to it. I have converted my spare room into a place to work out and have begun to wake up earlier…now to implement a routine. I’m just waiting for the doctor to give the green light. I do not intend to fail. I WILL PREVAIL.
Sean, I’m so grateful for the swift kick in the ass that you give in your blogs. Anyone voicing their anger at this one in particular is truly angry with themselves. The TRUTH hurts.
Like the ol’ saying goes… truth hurts. Being honest with people is the most unselfish gift you could give. Thank you, shine on<3
I can see a lot of people are hurt by your words and mostly they are in their teens and 20’s and they just don’t get it. I know I didn’t get it at that age. I’m 40 now. I met you in Seattle about 2 years ago and I told you I started Krav Maga to help my weight. Well… It has worked out for me but I had to quit the class because it was too far away (about 1 1/2 hour drive one way) I live in the mountains of California in Calaveras County and believe me it can be a bit rough up here. Your words are “Tough Love” like my mother would call them (R.I.P. Mom) and sometime they are hard to chew and you are right in every single way. I’m still at the middle of my goal and taking it one day at a time. I sometimes slip because I just happen to be a great at baking (Ask Wendy, she’s has my red velvet cupcake recipes) I was 226lbs when we met. I’m now at 162 and my goal is 130lbs. What motivated me was my knees, they where starting to hurt with all that weight (my Grizzly Bear) At 5’3″ you could imagine…..
I have started reading books on Krav Maga, meditation, Kimberly Snyder’s green smoothies, no red meat,potatoes,,nor frying ( and I used to make a great Fried Chicken) and the thing is…I really don’t miss it.
Thank you for talking to me that day in Seattle. I hope we meet again with my goal at hand. I’m gonna need Bear Hug from you. You were not the whole reason I needed to change my life, but you are a huge part in it. Your words are like a kick in the butt and some people need it, even if they don’t know it…
Thank you and with Love,
Ive lost over #50 over the past 6 years by finding my triggers and eliminating them, even if it was people. I find happiness in my family and friends, so it can be done! I still have a long way to go, but lifes a journey, right?
Sean you know that I am a huge fan and you also know by now that I also speak my mind . I run Twempirians Unite as a person not just a fan. I have lost 50 pounds and 8 sizes since April. I have changed my diet I sleep better and I exercise more. However I still feel that the best way to get ppl to do something is to motivate them not use name calling I also think you should acknowledge the fact that some of us are overweight due to illness or medication I would rather struggle with my weight than be sick again in the hospital away from my children before I was ill I was in the infantry and was in better shape than you are now I did martial arts and lifted weights. And now I do what I can to be healthy. I DON’T eat whatever I want and I am far from lazy acknowledge the fact that we are not all this way by our own fault some of us are victims of circumstance and fight it every day.
This comment is addressed to people who disagree with the idea that people have a choice in how their bodies look. Firstly, you never find thin, attractive people and ask them how they got to be in such good shape and they answer “Oh, I can’t do anything about this. It’s my genetics.” No, they take credit, because they probably worked their asses off to look the way they do. So for a overweight person to take the same road and blame their weight on genetics just makes them look that much worse. Yes, there are cases of hyper and hypothyroidism, but those are relatively rare. Every human being is born with pretty much the same body. You do not see babies born obese. Weight itself is not genetic. Metabolism, they way your body breaks down and synthesizes nutrients, however, can be passed down genetically. This, however is no excuse. Everyone has a choice in how they let their own body develop. I, for example, am a 21 year old female. The average weight of the first and second generation of my family on my mother’s side is 232 pounds and the average height is 5’7. The average weight for people on my father’s side is 281 pounds and the average height is 6’2. I have inherited a rather unfortunate metabolism. My body does not naturally look like a supermodel, nor do I look like a whale. I gain weight easier than people who have higher metabolisms, but I am not obese. I, however am 6 feet tall, and weigh 150 lbs have a BMI of 20.2. I have modified my life to suit what I want MYSELF to be, not what my genetic code predisposes me to be. Anyone can be thin. It is about what you eat, how often you exercise, and how you live your life. We are individuals, we are not bound by what is written in our DNA, we are bound by our own hard work and our own drive to better ourselves. You don’t blame your talents on your genetics, you don’t give your genetics credit for the races you win, the tests you ace, the masterpieces you paint. You take credit for your own successes, and also must take credit for your own failures. If you want to be better, get off the couch and make yourself better. But down the cheeseburger and pick up a stick of celery. Winning is never easy. Giving up is easy. Take the initiative to overcome the challenges through the tried and true method of doing it the hard way, and succeeding will only feel that much better.
If you find offense in Sean’s words then guess what? You’re fat! If you’re thin then there’s nothing for you to be offended over. You now have 2 choices. You can take what he said in & do something about being fat or you can continue to huff & puff & groan on the internet because someone called you fat. Yes you sitting there with a tub of ice cream in one hand & a 2ltr bottle of soda in the other. It’s your choice.
That’s basically what he was saying. I just said it a bit meaner. Why? Because I’m sick of this PC world where you have to handle everyone with kit gloves. Sean is trying to wake people up & sometimes you need a bull horn because people have become deaf to the truth. They stick their head in sand and scream LALALALALALALA I CAN’T HEAR YOU! Especially when it’s a home truth. “But, but, but sifi he called us fat!” So what? Are you fat? Then why is calling you fat so horrible? He’s not saying things like “Hey fat ass put down the fork & leave food for the rest of us.” He’s trying to motivate you to make a change in your life FOR THE BETTER. He’s taking time out of his very busy schedule to do you a solid. You should be thanking him instead of jumping down his throat.
For most of my life I’ve been at least chubby. For at least half my life I was FAT! I ballooned to over 260lbs. I made every excuse in the book. I came from a fat family. If I looked at food I’d gain weight. I just wasn’t meant to be a thin girl. A few yrs ago I was diagnosed with Diabetes. The first thing I did was stop drinking soda. I was drinking between 3 to 4ltrs a day. Within the first month I dropped 20lbs. That’s what kick started my new healthy lifestyle & finally losing weight. Over the next couple years I managed to lose 70lbs. Then I plateaued & got discouraged. A couple years passed & I stayed right there on that plateau. Then I found Sean on Twitter. I’d loved his work since Young Indy & decided to stalk his TL to see if he was an ass or a decent human. What I found was a person trying to help others get healthy. I found a “celeb” who actually cared. Someone who used their time to encourage others to make their lives better. I also found an amazing community of people who support each other. People who encourage each other & people who will pick you up when you’re down. I’ve since lost 20 more pounds. All because of finding 1 man. Someone I never expected to be the class act I found.
When I went to Austin for Comicon I kind of expected him to be a decent guy. He blew my expectations out of the water. He was kind, warm, friendly. He never once treated me like a fat chick. (He was the only actor that didn’t make me feel like the fat ugly chick bugging them & taking time away from the cute ones.) He just treated me like an old friend. Something I didn’t expect. He even did research on a good BJJ dojo for me that would be closer to my house. That’s a person who’s trying to help out. Not someone trying to be mean spirited or cruel.
You may accuse me of crawling up his hiney. I’m not. I have my own mind & do my best to see things for what they are. If he had been an ass I’d say that. (Maybe not on his site. That would be really rude.) Next time you read one of his blogs try to look at from the perspective of someone who’s trying to help you. You just might get more out of it.
Thats my GIRL! couldnt have said it better!
I just want to quote something Sean said… Why? because I am still learning…
“Anger is always the first reaction…”
It has taken me 40 years to realize this.. And I only did, because I am here reading these posts. Before my first post today, I was still angry…. (for different reasons of course) And was still blaming my issues on other people.. After my last post, I was still trying to figure out if I had any of it right. So I thought on this all night at work.. This is what I came up with, and if I am way off please be blunt… I really hate pussy footing around..
IF anything Sean or anyone said has made you angry, then it is already working.. BUT, remember he does not validate you.. YOU validate you.. Those bullies who called you “fat ass” in school do not validate you.. Your ex who left you for that hotter skinnier younger girl, does NOT validate you…
Let these words or expressions piss you off and make you angry.. But let them because you want to… Yeah, SPF is awesome I love him but his words have pissed me off too.. BUT I am not sitting here feeling embarrassed, or crushed.. Now I am just even more determined to be any kind of successful.. I have to think, I have to pay attention… I have to get the fuck out of my head, and stop living in my made up world… Stop pretending “whatever” does or does not exist.. I exist, I am not fat, but I might as well be.. I am FULL of excuses.. Sure there is always tomorrow, so why worry about today.. I am a procrastinator… It really is so damn easy to pretend, that after too long we start to just fade, or give up or something.. At the same time I am relentless.. WTF!!! Can I make up my mind already? This is exhausting..
My point is, (and the next word people) ACKNOWLEDGE!! I ACKNOWLEDGED my OWN bs… acknowledge yours.. So you can finally start to correct it… AS Mr. Flanery put it, more or less…
First of all I’d like to do some “celebrity ass kissing” because frankly you don’t see too many like Flanery taking time out of their lives to listen to people who say how much they love them, think they’re sexy, blah, blah (more crazy ass shit) blah, and take time to respond. Now that I’m done with that little tidbit here is my actual statement, it might offend some but in all truth I DON’T GIVE A FUCK. For those getting hung up on the fact that his choice of words such as “fatties” differs from your politically correct term, which ever they may be, is clouding you from what he is really trying to express. Our America is so hung up on making things easier for The working man/woman, we have fast food in almost every town, premade snacks and “dinners” loaded with saturated fats, and not enough people getting the motivation they need to create a healthier life; is it so wrong to get off that moral high horse and admit that our country is highly obese and dying. I am not a 104 little girl talking but a woman who’s been thru much of the worlds troubles. I have always been on the heavy side but after becoming pregnant I thought I was entitled to eat whatever the hell I wanted. It wasn’t until I was on a hospital bed being induced into labor and being told that my child wasn’t getting enough oxygen, that part of me knew shit had to change. I was the fatty that he so bluntly talks about, after having my child I was 235lbs, I had put my body through hell and before that I had been a heavy set person so I made a choice. I’ve lost 45 lbs, I run, hike and work out daily so I can be here for my daughter. As for the fact of children being bullied because of their weight and committing suicide that is a cowards way out ITS NOT WHAT PEOPLE CALL YOU BUT WHAT YOU ANSWER TOO! Its so simple to point fingers and say it was someone else’s fault, people are going to say things about you till the day you die if you don’t like it then do something about it show those people that you are not what they call you, put your middle finger in the air and scream a big FUCK YOU. Oh and its alright if you don’t like what’s being said, you can take your ninny ass somewhere else, it’s a blog people, one persons take on the world, the admin can post whatever is wanted. It’s your choice to read it and take it to heart or blog back and get your feelings hurt. Again and I say this with all seriousness if you don’t like what is being said then find somebody else who’s going to sugar coat shit for you.
(Sorry about the cussing)
Wow…u can’t be that shallow right? I do not sit on a couch have a beautiful big ass..no dimples and am a bartender ( unfortunately) by trade now…still I see the point..oxy moron excluded! I would be on the gym if I could. Tell me Sean..am I less desirable because I am not a size 2, 4, 6 ,or even 8? So was Marilyn not attractive to you? You have changed my opinion of u as a person…what is the point of making your fans or friends feel inferior to you? I hope you r meaning the extreme overweight..
I think he means that there is a “huge” problem in America. At least he is not ignoring the FACTS. How many fat Chinese people do you see? There’s those big fat wrestlers in Japan, they are like a Japanese minority, but there is a problem with overweight people, they are only hurting themselves and maybe that hurts their loved ones in a ripple effect… It hinders people. I personally don’t care about individual fat people that don’t care about themselves, but I see how the “fast” lane has provided an unhealthy environment which causes some struggles with food choices. We, America, have created McDonald’s, burger king, jack in the box, taco time, etc. and are viewed as “FAT” society by other countries around the globe. I’m glad an American can stand up and face the truth and accept reality and try to do something to change it for the better than ignore it and dwindle into the abyss of two-faced people. I don’t feel inferior to this “celebrity” I’ve yet to meet, I don’t think that he means to make one feel inferior, he is equally if not harder on himself than he is on others. There’s nothing wrong with speaking the truth and exercising constitutional rights. PS, a big beautiful ass with no dimples can be desirable… You may have a very attractive shape and have normal blood pressure and everything, I’m sure he’s directing it towards the obese that are becoming diabetics and such. And Marilyn was beautiful, inside and out!!
To me there is a major difference between “Beauty” and “Healthy”. There are larger women who are stunning and trim women who are…not so stunning. It also goes the opposite way. I don’t think this is a matter of “Thin is Beautiful”. The message I get from Sean is to care about yourself and get healthy.
I mean for my response above to go under a difference comment…
Holy whoa…okay, I didn’t read all the comments, but it’s so weird to me that some people are getting hung up on a single word when there is so much more to be taken away from this post. It’s basically stopping them in their tracks and they cannot get past it. A bit ironic, really.
Sure, there are people with health issues that can cause them to be overweight. BUT THE SOLUTION IS ALWAYS THE SAME. Always. And perhaps there are certain people aren’t always directly responsible for their weight gain – if they’re young and grew up in an unhealthy household or there was an illness that set them back – but their weight LOSS is always going to be their responsibility. It’s so easy to make mountains of excuses to muddy the situation so it comes off very complex and confusing and impossible, but it is not. Everyone has problems and issues and hurdles that can stop them from doing what needs to be done. We make the choice.
Okay, I have severe Crohn’s Disease and Lupus. I am in extreme pain every day. The truth is, once you stop feeling sorry about yourself and get off your ass and make a change, things will get better. Sean is right, The truth hurts, but the truth works. I am currently down 55 lbs and counting, by changing what i ate and got off my ass and started exercising. Believe it or not the pain has actually decreased significantly. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not gone completely and never will, but it’s tolerable now. I did this all thanks to the motivation of the great Sean Patrick Flanery. He’s brutally honest, not trying to be a bully. We need more people like that. And that Sean is why I love you!
I am sure some feathers are ruffled over this subject but sometimes “in your face truth” is the only thing that gets through to someone. Lets face it if gaining & losing weight & staying healthy was completely easy this country wouldn’t have the obesity problem. I think everyone is always capable of being a better version of themselves. Like an Art Project-“a work in progress”. For myself trying to live a stronger, healthier life and its making me feel different about the possibilities in my life.
For the people who use the fact that they were abused as children as an excuse to why they are overweight, that is no excuse. I was abused, molested as a kid, and damaged more than many people know. I get how it can mess up your head, because I have been there. But making it out to be an excuse to let yourself become unhealthy will only destroy you further. Will that give you the confidence that being raped took away? Absolutely not. I was raped, I was beaten. And I didn’t allow myself to succumb to a lifestyle of shame and self hatred. Using that as an excuse to defend your own laziness only makes you appear weak. Grow a pair and take control of your own life, your own body, and your own mind.
Many have mentioned traumatic events from their past that are interfering with their weight loss. I’ve had plenty of trauma in my life that I do not care to talk about, but what I realize is that being a healthy person includes emotional well being as well as proper weight and nutrition. I’ve lost and gained huge amounts of weight over the years. My mindset was always, “I’ll be happy when I’m skinny.” I’d get to my ideal weight and still be miserable, so I’d go back to destroying myself with food. I finally decided I did not want to die so I set out to IMPROVE myself this time, not just lose weight. I examined my life and identified what my obstacles are and set out to destroy them a little at a time. I realized I tend to be negative. I started with something very small – smiling even when I didn’t feel like it. I can just imagine people rolling their eyes after reading that, but hear me out. I also stopped complaining all the time about things I cannot change. People respond differently to you when you seem happy. One day at work my colleague said, “Wow, you’re in a good mood today!” I was a little shocked when I realized I was. Another huge obstacle I had to deal with is stress. There are many sources of stress in my life that I cannot avoid, so I just changed the way I handle them. I did find many forms of stress that I could control like people that are negative or extremely critical. I don’t need those people in my life. When I have a bad day now, I identify the things I could not control and let them go. If I made a mistake, I admit it, decide not to do it again, and let it go. I’m not going to beat myself up anymore about my past. For the first time EVER dieting and exercising does not seem like torture. I don’t feel the need to buy a bag of Oreos and eat them all. I’m losing weight and I feel great. I will get to my goal.
I guess what I’m trying to say, if anyone bothers to read all of this, is to not only focus on weight loss but also on your emotional well being because you can’t have one without the other.
I did read your reply & agree. I do think that emotional well being has so much to do with making positive things happen in your life. Wish you all the best & keep smiling 🙂
I try to keep it simple and eat only 1 ingredient foods. Do I always follow that rule….No!!! I will always pick myself up and try harder the next day, I have found 1 ingredient foods work best for me! Will I ever be as thin as a super model…No!!! Can I be as healthy as I choose….Yes!!! Do I always get to work out for an hour or more every day….No, if 10-15 mins is all I can fit in, then that is better than no minutes!!!! Action always generates inspiration!!!! As you are, I have been. As I am, you will be!!!!
I joined the Ymca because of Sean. Yes. It’s his intensity and passion that did it.
Before joining, I was convinced that exercise = work = pain and suffering. Ok. I was still convinced until two weeks into a gym routine and a sauna/whirlpool treat after…But, hey! It turns out that not only did I start feeling good and getting fit/healthy (despite my health issues that can be used for overweight excuses), what happened was this…
I discovered that fitness is actually enjoyable! Daily living is much better with more energy.
You can always dance if a treadmill is not your thing. Enjoy yourself. It’s a state of mind.
…turns out the treadmill’s a blast… x
Sean, I would love to see you make some kind of mention in a blog emphasizing the other side of the coin: the WRONG ways to lose weight, such as developing eating disorders. One would assume that since you stress exercise and eating right, you wouldn’t have any fans with that problem but you may be surprised.
Sean…thanks for the encouraging words, yet again. I’ve only got about 20 lbs post baby weight to lose, (and by god I will lose them dammit! even if it takes me another 2 years!)
I’ve been on a plan and I work out when I find the time (and do all those extra little things like a walk at lunch or taking stairs over escalator, etc etc). But….I’m going to play devil’s advocate here for those who are having a hard time with their weight loss. Sometimes it’s not just about ‘excuses’ or ‘laziness’. I know I can speak for others when I say that mentally it’s so hard sometimes. I’ve acknowledged that I’m a fattie but not because my clothes are a bit snug on me, but because my BRAIN is obsessed with food and the feelings that I get when I eat something full of deliciousness–it’s almost like an addiction. I always denied that I had an emotional attachment to food, but I do. I claimed I was never an emotional eater because I didn’t eat when I was sad or angry but I have learned that I AM in fact an emotional eater because to me, eating is an EVENT. (maybe it’s the Italian in me). I’ve had a love affair with food, GOOD healthy food too–not even processed junk food, but REAL food, and that’s been my battle.
What helped me was when I learned to stop looking at food as something that gives me pleasure and started to look at food for what it REALLY is–FUEL and NUTRITION for your body!! Not going to lie, but accepting that was actually sad for me! Almost like a breakup with someone! But once I accepted that, the emotional attachment started to lessen and it helped me in my weight loss tremendously.
Now….I have a mantra that I try to stick to–to help me with my emotional eating Basically, I remind myself, “hey…. if hunger is not the problem then food is not the solution!” Sometimes it works, but other times it doesn’t.
Anyway, I did a lot of rambling just to point out that sometimes it’s way more of a mental battle for some than a physical battle.
And another point I’d like to make to those that feel that moving more and eating less just doesn’t work anymore. Do yourself a favor and try and catch Extreme Makeover Weight Loss Edition with Chris Powell. The people on that show have done some unbelievable things with this man’s help! Losing 200, 300, 400 lbs! IT CAN BE DONE! When I see how hard these people work AND end up losing those monumental numbers, then I know that I can do anything.
I am the mother of an overweight child. I, myself, could stand to lose about 20 pounds. I am working on that. Let me begin by saying that I am not lazy. I am not a horrible mother. I will say that my life for the last 8 years has been rough, to the say the least. A divorce, unemployment, welfare, food stamps, moving, parental issues with my childrens’ father, 3 years of trying to make a life for us, then unemployment, welfare, food stamps, homelessness, and continued stress and emotional crap pretty much sums it all up. I know, I know…all excuses. Hear me out, put this all together under the wings of a single mother, and you should be impressed neither of us are on medication, have been committed, or may I dare to say, dead. We have survived. Unfortunately, my daughter survived by eating. Our life has showed her how to soothe herself with food. I watched helplessly as my daughter continued to gain weight, until she has reached age 16 and almost 300 pounds. It breaks my heart to know she is endangering her health. And I know I am also to blame for this. I couldn’t afford to buy healthy food or pay for her to join a gym. I try to get her out of the house to walk at least 3 days a week, but our weather doesn’t play nice. I can hear you all screaming…EXC– USES!! EXC– USES!! Well, that’s all fine and dandy. So, now I’m asking what can I do to help her? Help me get rid of these excuses. Just know that I’m on welfare, jobless, and homeless (living with “friends”). A good start would be a job, an income, and a home. But for now, I’ll take whatever I can get.
Perimeter shop first. Not being able to afford healthy food but being able to afford junk food because you can buy more of it is an attitude people take to excuse not eating healthy. I say BS! Shop the outside of the grocery store, where he fresh fruits and veggies are, and the meats. Read the ingredients. Start with one step at a time in the changes and be consistent. V8 fusion is our favorite juice with full serving of veggies with less sugar than regular apple juice. Keep learning about your food and what you eat. Can you afford to let your daughter get fatter or healthier?
I agree with everything Sean says. My daughter knows she’s fat. She accepts it. She knows it’s unhealthy. But she also feels that she shouldn’t have to change herself because society says so…she’s 16…she knows everything, right? 16 and almost 300 pounds. I am a single mother, unemployed after 3 years of working, which followed 2 years of unemployment raising my family. My daughter ate to soothe her emotions after her father and I split. I watched her gain the weight, and I tried to help her. I paid for a membership to our local YMCA, but that limited her to using the pool, not the weight room or classes. I stopped the membership due to finances, such as I have none. I tried helping her watch what she eats, limiting her portions, and trying the eating every few hours approach. While I was working, I couldn’t control what she ate because I wasn’t home. Now that I’m home, I don’t have the money to buy the healthier foods. One pound of apples last for a day or two. A pot of pasta could last three days…my dilemma. I am currently jobless, penniless, and homeless–depending on my friends to let us live with them–which is now causing more emotional distress to all of us. I want to help her. I want her to heal. I could use a little healing myself, around 20 pounds worth. SHE IS MY PRIORITY!!
Scream at me all you want that all I have are excuses…I’ve heard it before. How do I not have any more excuses? Someone send me a miracle!!
At 16, motivation has to come from within her or a life changing experience. I was where she was at that age myself. I am 35 and it took severe health issues, forced retirement and other factors to pull my head out of my arse. My goal isn’t thin but healthy. I want to be able to move without needing a wheelchair for as long as I can. Is there an activity she enjoys, a group of friends who can make it fun? Is there a counselor at her school to help her work through some of the divorce issues and retrain that food doesn’t have to be the only comfort?
Sorry, something glitched and I posted twice…oh, well…twice as much fun, right? 🙂
So, Im not over weight or inactive at all. But this post still inspired me to keep after my goals in life and to step it up. Thanks Sean for a little inspiration, gonna go outside tomorrow kick some butt!! 🙂
Good evening. Mr. Flanery.
After reading your article, here are some of my thought that I want to share with you.
I guess those strong words you chose like “fat”, just like some kind of exercise or training for my mind and heart. It’s tough and difficult for me but I should calm down and try to understand what the article said. Someone I like said “fattie” to me… Well, it’s really hurt, BUT the worst thing is: IT IS FACT. *look the fat on belly* It’s hard to accept in the beginning but I know exactly that only I take this fact so that I can make some change.
For me, it’s hard to imagine that heart disease or diabetes could happen to me so I won’t take care of myself and even ignore something wrong with my life. But the issue “FAT” actually attracts my notice. Well… so I guess you do have a reason to call me “fat”. After all it is working.
I still remembered that you said “It is the best way to show respect for life… by first respecting my own.” And a lady told me that exercise “It’s a long process but worth it in the end.” on twitter. I saw photos and tweets you retweet that show me many people started changing their life and did really well.
I think the point is “To be a healthy person”. I went to see the doctor and he taught me to what time to eat, what kind of food to eat, and how to do exercise in daily life. I don’t take elevator or bus but climbing stairs and taking walk. Jogging with my I-pod. I can still have some sweets but not too much. Stay in a good mood makes more healthy, I think.
It’s my challenge to become more healthy. Maybe someday I can fly to America to see you, who knows? So I’ll keep trying to make myself better.
I still can’t believe so many people are up in arms over this one word. It’s an age old recipe, my mom new it inthe 50’s. Eat healthy exercise. If you don’t want to be a fattie that’s what you have to do. No fad diets. Stand up and go take a wallk, no money needed for that. Stretch, get some hand weights, put on a cd and dance…just MOVE. Add one healthy thing to your diet everyday and then the next week another. Then start removing a bad thing. It’s not rocket science. STOP w/excuses. People who say they don’t have the financial means are ridiculous. It takes no extra money to be healthy. You don’t even have to go to a gym. I have only met Sean twice. Couldn’t be more down to earth and genuinely a nice person. If you follow him you must know he is a no holds barred, honest, no bullshit kind of guy. Also not mean or judgemental. Actually the opposite. What you see is what you get. If your hide is that thin and a word can put you in a tallspin…you should go elsewhere. Not blowing smoke up his ass,..but it REALLY IS THAT SIMPLE.
Mr. Flanery, I don’t want to be a nuisance, (sorry if I am).. I have been reading your blog, as well as following you on twitter… Your methods of motivating people are way out there.. But I know they work. I realize you are very busy and can’t possibly read every single comment or question that comes you way from fans.. But I have asked this before, and I will ask again… How can I as a mother motivate my 18 year old son, who has since moved out to get healthy? He is almost 300 lbs, and lives with people who are also very unhealthy.. The overweight thing is completely on him, and he knows he doesn’t look good.. He is lazy except for when he has to go to work… But I am concerned for his health, and the people he lives with only enable him.. perhaps some of that is on me too… I did raise him, but I have NEVER raised my children to be junk food addicts… Candy and treats were never a part of our lives, except for special occasions… Even Mcdonalds is forbidden… William has had his blood tested, and nothing serious has shown up.. But that doesn’t mean it wont. Someone suggested he might be hypoglycemic.. Well I have no clue what the hell that even is.. Diabetes does not run in our family, but certain cancers do… Maybe you know a website you can direct me to with extremely graphic pictures of people who have suffered major consequences of being obese… Or something.. I don’t know.. I know it sounds like I am begging, and perhaps I am.. But you are already on a mission to help people.. So please help me to help my son.. make him a part of that mission…Anything you can suggest I will take seriously… I don’t want to lose my baby boy…It is just even more difficult now, that he has moved out.. when he lived with me, I always cooked healthy.. Though I could never control what he did when he was out of the house… Before he moved, he was at around 250 lbs… Anything you can do or say to help please…
Ask your son if he wants to end up like Patrick Deuel http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oxQUnFflWBE or like these teenagers http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jzktJYFkEJ0
Get him to talk to you openly and honestly about why he doesn’t value his own life.
There are countless benefits to being healthy…
Reduce risks of: cardiovascular disease, type 2 diabetes and metabolic syndrome, some cancers, reduced risk of pain and death
Improve: strengthen your bones and muscles, improve your mental health and mood, increase chances of living longer
I’d never heard of Mr Flanery until today when I was called out to the home of a 14 yr old patient who suffers from severe asthma and requires powerful steroids to control her symptoms, as a result she is around 2 stones overweight, this is common for people being treated in this way and usually resolves itself if/when treatment is stopped. However, the girl in question had decided to stop taking her medication in order to lose weight and had not told anybody. To cut a long story short, she ended up in hospital this afternoon, when I asked her what had possessed her to stop her meds she burst into tears and told me “Sean doesn’t like fat girls.” I assumed Sean was a boy she fancied until her Mom told me about Mr Flanery and his blog. The girl in question is a huge fan of Sean and his films. Kids from school had been using this blog as a way of attacking her, sending her links to it with snide messages about ‘Fatties’ etc… I’ve read the blog aswell as all the following messages and can only say that these bullies seem to have found a kindred spirit in Mr Flanery. His use of words designed to upset, condescending tone and his dismissal of anyone who ‘questions’ him or his ‘plan’ (which is a true example of ‘the emperors new clothes’) as deluded or stupid is appalling and quite frankly dangerous.
I’m sorry. I must of missed the part of the blog or the comments that told ANYONE to stop taking needed medication in order to lose weight. It must have been in the same portion that commanded others to become bulimic. It is a tragedy that a 14 year old girl would take such drastic measures to lose weight but could you please point out to me where in this blog, or any other, there has been any other suggestion besides eat right and exercise? I think most health professionals advise their patients to do the same. No, Mr. Flanery is not a medical doctor or a psychiatrist but the advice he has given here is common sense to anyone willing to take it as it is given. Healthy living does not equate itself to discontinuing needed medication. And to place all the blame for doing so is beyond unfair and just as closed minded as you accuse him to be.
My point is NOT that the blog told her to stop her meds. My point is that when you set yourself up as some sort of weight loss guru then you’d better know what you’re talking about. To say that the only reason people are fat is that they eat too much is wrong. Eating well and regular exercise is not a new idea and is what I would advise my patients in most cases, the difference is that I would NEVER call them fatties or any other name because it doesn’t, whatever Sean thinks, help anybody. How on earth is he qualified to tell someone that they’re just making excuses when he hasn’t even met them or seen their medical records? I can’t and I spent the best part of a decade training! I speak on a regular basis to young women who have developed eating disorders (some who didn’t have a problem in the first place) because of bullying and name calling, so many young people have a massively distorted idea of what healthy looks like and bdd is incredibly common.
When you are a role model to young, impressionable people you should realise that your words have an impact and while I don’t think for one minute that it’s Mr. Flanerys fault that my patient chose to stop taking her meds, I do believe that when you write a blog that is intended to help people that it should do just that and help people. Not insult them. Because the ‘truth’ is that most overweight people get enough insults without their favourite celeb joining in.
Hm. I have to admit, I don’t agree with the exact wording of what you say, for different reasons, but really….You’re right. It’s really all just excuses. And we humans are very good at coming up with them, whenever something doesn’t suit us, not matter the situation.
There is always a way to fix being overweight. Yes, some have medical problems that cause it, but there is always a way to fix that as well, some may need the help to start, others need an operation to help them in the beginning. But even after that, it’s still all up to them. I know this from experience. You can’t just do it either, and then stop. The change need to be permanent.
Anyway, I’ve always been overweight, well, most of my life. I managed at the most to drop 75 lbs in two years, by eating right and exercising. Was wonderful being only 160 lbs. My back pains went away, I had tons of energy, even had less migraines cause I wasn’t so stressed out all the time.
Unfortunately I gained more than half of it again when I got sick. Couldn’t exercise/move and even though I kept eating the same healthy diet, I gained weight again cause I couldn’t move, the pain was all consuming and I got dangerously depressed. But I managed to pick myself up again by focusing on the little things. I got well again, lost some of the weight, but then got sick again, and third time it was the same all over again. This fourth time I got really angry. Feeling like everything was working against me, I literally told myself that there is NO F***ING WAY that I am gonna lose this battle, thinking of both my body giving up on me and my weight making it worse. So I started to push myself, it was painful, but no pain – no gain, doing things ppl said I couldn’t etc. Just thought, no? Watch me! Managed to push myself enough to get off crutches a lot faster than the doctors thought I could and even lost weight while doing it. I was so surprised….thinking why didn’t that happen before? It’s not like I didn’t try. You know what? It was simply the motivation, the anger. It really energized me. (I had it before too, but not enough of it.)
I’ll never forget my doctors smile when he heard….. In 3 months I’m now already halfway to my goal (160 lbs, more will be a bonus) and am working full time again. So yeah, even though I don’t agree with your exact wording, it does hurt being called fat….But you know what? I gets our attention….making ppl angry works. lol. At least if it makes them get on their feet and do something about it. 🙂 So why not? 😉 I don’t sugarcoat anything myself, so can’t fault anyone else for not doing it either. Truth hurts, simple as that. Think I’ll keep reading your blog. 😉
It is an absolute fact that several health issues (slow metabolism, cushings, hypothyroidism, diabetes and more) as well as many medications (corticosteroids, lithium, antidepressants and more) all have the unfortunate side effect of weight gain. There is no way to dispute this, because it is an absolute fact.
It’s also an absolute fact that the number of people suffering these specific circumstances is vastly disproportionate to the number of obese people. More simply put: there are far more people who are fat because they consume more calories than they burn.. than there are people who are overweight due to disease process/medication.
Am I a physician? No, I’m not…but I am the RN standing beside your Physician as he’s diagnosing you as being overweight based on your poor diet and sedentary lifestyle. You know how you got that way, yet you try to coax a “gland” diagnosis from the Dr reading your tests results, which say your glands are operating as they should.
But Drs don’t have to work “hands on” the way nurses do. This is why our careers are being cut short due to the astronomical number of back injuries…look it up. It is literally crippling us to lift, push, pull and tug at your bulk, so you can‘t sell your excuses to us. We’re the ones who have to…
~Order extra food trays because 1 wont fill you up.
~Call 3-4 other nurses into your room to help turn/move you.
~Dedicate 1 person to holding up/pushing back folds/flaps of fat to do our job.
~Give more medication than normally required because the standard dose is ineffective.
~Locate a facility with machines (now) specifically designed/created to accommodate your size.
~Figure out how to transport you because you’re too wide to fit between the arms of a wheelchair. ~Hold staff off other clients, to walk beside your gurney, because you’re hanging off both sides.
The list goes on and on, and it is unprecedented in the history of this nation. We had never required this equipment before, because we didn’t have widespread obesity 20, 30, 40 yrs ago. But people didn’t live off fast food and carbonated beverages while staring at a tv or gaming system. (Or whatever your vice may be.)
Is your first instinct to say “if you didn’t want to help people you shouldn’t have become a nurse?” If that were true, I’d agree with you, but that isn’t the case. The truth is that most nurses are essentially healthy and proportionately sized, and we’re growing less sympathetic to your plight once you get rude with us. It’s true. After realizing we (at 120-140 #s) can’t lift or move you (at 275+ #s) and that we require help, you get embarrassed then you lash out. Why should I have to take verbal abuse from you, because you’re overweight? I shouldn’t!
You may be poor, displaced, embarrassed, angry, obese etc (I can’t address every excuse you can make as to why you won’t become proactive in your own health) but I can tell you this..
~If you have a roof, you have a floor and you can do sit ups, push ups and leg lifts.
~If you cant jog in place STAND UP while you’re watching tv and walk in place.
~If you’re grossly obese you can start by working your arms. Lift them til you sweat.
~If you’re too big to get down in the floor then STAND UP and do push ups off the wall.
You’ve just got to move! If you’ll start moving your metabolism will increase. You will build stamina. You will burn calories. You will lose fat. You won’t get skinny, but skinny shouldn’t be the goal. ~Healthy should be the goal.
~Stop buying soda..drink water.
~Don’t eat until you’re full..eat until you’re not hungry.
~Don’t eat when you’re sad, bored, depressed..instead, get moving.
~Less carbs and more protein is ideal. If you can’t manage that, just don’t eat McDonalds!
Not only have we become an obese nation.. we’ve come to want/need/expect political correctness to a point of absurdity. Believing the world should make excuses for you, because you make excuses for yourself is ridiculous.
Personally, I don’t want or need anyone to sugarcoat the facts for me, and you shouldn’t want or need anyone to sugarcoat the facts for you. If you’re instinct is to lash out at Sean because he hit a nerve, maybe take a minute before you start bitching to figure out the ’real’ reason his words stung you. Literally ask yourself “is it because I’m fat and offended?” If the answer is yes, it isn’t his fault.
Thank you for your articulate and insightful comment. I am appreciative you took the time to share your first-hand experience and knowledge as a person and medical professional. I hope that everyone reads it and understands that you and Sean are are both saying the same message … “Healthy should be the goal”.
Excellent post! I never thought about it from your perspective before. I stay fit for the sake of my own health, but now I’ll also be factoring into my daily motivation the impact obesity can have on other people, which I’m ashamed to say I hadn’t ever really considered. I’m 36, with 4 children and an underactive thyroid, so the healthy level of fitness I enjoy is routinely earned through discipline and hard work, which means that every piece of inspiration I can use to support my continued motivation is welcome. I sincerely thank you!
PuttingMyNameCouldMeanMyJob’s response has been my favorite so far!!! I could not agree more.
Did anyone read my previous post? There are three types of bodies: ectomorph, mesomorph and endomorph – Look it up for Bob’s sake! We are not all suppose to look alike! Work your hardest at being the best that YOU can be and stop making excuses!
Yes, I read your previous post Kelly! And I agree “Work your hardest at being the best that YOU can be and stop making excuses!”
You know what? Sean’s word is not gospel & those that follow it to the letter need to ask themselves why they are doing so instead of forming their own thoughts & acting on them.
Sean is not bullying anyone, he does not single out specific people or point fingers directly..
What he does achieve is making people THINK, a written reality check for some. Maybe a few words ring true, maybe you would like to be a better person or a little healthier & why not? You get one life, don’t waste it, be a credit to YOURSELF.
Yes there are people who are hindered by medication, maybe it isn’t the right medication for you? Go back & see your Doctor, do not take no for an answer, explore the possibilities of other medication with them, be an active participant in the medical process, don’t just sit back & take it.
Life is not meant to be made of ‘if only’ & ‘why didn’t I?’ & taking the easy path, it is there for the living, forge your own way & don’t just exist, LIVE.
& this is not aimed at anyone, as Sean has penned his thoughts, I am too.
Thanks for the swift kick in the ass. I really needed it, I hope some day to show you side by side pics of my changes. I was always a small girl with kicking curves, and now my curves have kicked me. I have been to so many doctors only to be told they can’t find out what’s wrong with me, but they know I’m “sick”. They blamed my stress level for the massive weight gain, and now that the stress is down, the depression left is killing me. I know nothing will change if I don’t change it myself.
To the people get all riled up cause of this post Sean is not being mean or name calling. He is stating facts & what’s reality. Sorry some of you just give excuses & think he is being rude. He isn’t he said he is here to help us all. I used to be the person who used excuses….not anymore because I accepted reality & what I can do to help myself. Also with someone who has suffered depression. I lost drive to workout or stay healthy. Sean’s words inspired me greatly & guess what I feel much better when I workout & I am not as bad as I used to be. People all have problems mentally & physically we are human. But if you want to be happy then do it for yourself trust me it feels good.
We know Medications and some Medical & Psychological conditions predispose a person to gain weight, but that’s just it, we all KNOW that it’s a POSSIBILITY! It’s not an inevitability! There are no major medical or psychological conditions (other than a few Cardiac pro arrhythmic conditions) that don’t benefit from exercise and a balanced diet. Walking is exercise, it doesnt have to mean joining a gym or spending money, move more & eat moderately. I’m speaking as a nurse but also as a patient on hefty doses of immunosuppressant therapy and life long steroids! I have not put on weight I make sure of it. A very close member of my family attempted suicide & following a lengthy psychiatric hospital stay 4 years ago & taking a cocktail of extremely strong anti psychotic & anti depressant drugs attributes exercise as fundamental in his recovery and exercise & healthy eating maintain him at a healthy weight & in a positive state of mind! I own my life I control what happens to my body. I choose to take the toxic pls that keep me alive & I choose do as much as i can to counteract the side effects!I chose to read this blog and I choose to take on board advice if I think it will make me happier and live longer. We all have a choice, I agree with Sean I choose life!
You agree with sean you choose life… Does that mean those of us who don’t agree with sean choose death? His word is not the be all end all there are other ways to live.
Here is a direct quote from the blog: “So, what is the recipe for prevention? …Pick one. Just about every single diet and exercise program out there works. BUT, they only work if you do them.”
To each his own opinion, but why is that hard to agree with?
He’s not saying you must do everything he personally does. You just have to DO SOMETHING and commit to it. Not one diet program or workout routine is going to be uniform for everyone. Sean eats well and does BJJ. I watch what I eat and walk… I’m not what would be classified at “Fit”, but I am much healthier than I was almost 50lbs ago.
Yes it means exactly that, DEATH. Perhaps not immediately, but a slow painful existence followed by death. Unless you eat healthy food types, reasonable portions AND exercise on a regular basis, then you are choosing DEATH. It is NOT at all living life to a person’s fullest potential to do otherwise.
You are still hiding behind excuses, shame and the false hope that people will tell you it is ok to be fat and unhealthy. Worst yet you are passing on your bad habits and bad attitude to your daughters. By the way it is NOT ok to have a “cheat day”, because the only person you are cheating is YOURSELF!!!
Breesie, you are fat, miserable, low self-esteem, other possible health issues, and ruining your children’s lives … how is that a good LIFE? Please rationally explain to everyone why you think “your way” is better.
I think I clearly articulated My thoughts on My choices in My comment!
Sean, I Have To Say, THANK YOU!!!
About a year ago I was 55 lbs over weight, at this moment I am 30 lbs over and NOT where I want to be. I am 5′ 7 going to be 19 next month and I am Not happy where I am!! For the past 5 months I’ve been doing the exact same things as before to lose the weight but it just won’t come off. Is there something you can recommend for me to do to loose it?? I Would Try Anything!!!
To get things that you’ve never had, you have to be willing to do things that you’ve never done.
I Believe that is Very True! There’s A Lot that I Never done. So where should I start? Small or Dive Right In??
We can’t solve a problem while in the same mindset – same route of thinking – from which the problem occurred. We can’t even SEE the problem from within that space. There are well-traveled tracks (patterns) in our minds where we most frequently think, and we can only change those if we change the way we think and see. Make new roads with new information and new possibilities. Often we will need to be shocked out of those old tracks. I am grateful for the people in my life who have been willing to confront me about areas where I may be harming myself and/or others. I’m grateful for the clarity of this message. Few people are willing to point out that someone is slowly committing a form of suicide. I accept the challenge and it is now a part of several seemingly overwhelming battles I am facing. I just believe that the view on the other side will be worth the work to get through – one mountain at a time. (And never stop to admire the view for too long because there will always be a new challenge and opportunity awaiting you on that other side!)
I wish more people would speak the truth like you do & encourage people to just “move” and eat better & not sugar coat everything. That is one of the reasons I really like your blogs, tweet posts- you are honest & speak the truth… People just don’t want to hear the truth & accept facts…
I was really overweight all my life and got made fun of all the time & the summer before I started high school (many years ago); I finally had enough of the BS & got my crap together & was tired of making excuses. I started working out, eating better & even got a job at a gym & lost all the weight in a healthy way… I am now 39 and in the best shape I have ever been. I enjoy working out & I feel awesome after I do…I look at it as “an hour & a half out of my day isn’t going to kill me” & in the end I feel good about myself & I know I did something good for my body….
The solution is so easy its ridiculous (eat better & be active)..
Keep inspiring people Sean… see you again in NOLA…
Sean, I read this about a week ago and never bothered commenting, though I should have because everything you said is true and I respect the hell out of you for being so amazingly honest!!! Sugar coating words is like sugar coated sweets, it helps makes you fat. I decided to comment today because this the time of the year that reminds me why I work as hard as I do. I come from a very large family, both in amount of members and in body mass. Of all of the adults, it’s us younger generation that aren’t fat yet, and I stress the yet, because a couple of my cousins are on their way to it. Today nobody wanted to cook and I didn’t have the time or the space to cook for that many so we went to a hotel Thanksgiving buffet. It was horrifying watching them shovel it in and go up for more. They skip all of the healthy options and go straight for the high fat, high calorie, artery cloggers. I love my family, they mean the world to me, but it was gross and embarrassing. And, it was a very large reminder of why I work my ass off at the gym 5 hours everyday, no break. It is why I follow a strict diet. I grew up with a family of fatties and I grew up watching what it does to them. My Grandmother has type two diabetes, has had triple bypass surgery, knee surgery and can barely walk. The majority of my Aunts and Uncles have heart problems, high cholesterol,asthma, diabetes, knee problems, and probably every other preventable health problem you can name. They can’t walk up a flight of stairs without sounding like they ran a marathon. I work my ass off because I want to live and not be in pain, and a lot of their health problems are hereditary, heart conditions and diabetes are very prominent on both sides of my family even in the thin members, so I am very careful to prevent them for as long as I can. I refuse to go down without a fight. I work my ass off because I want to be happy and healthy. I work my ass off because I want to be a good rolemodel. I work my ass off because I am 22 and have my whole life ahead of me. All the blood, sweat, and tears shed in the workout room are definitely worth it. Now, if we could only get others as motivated as us. 😀
I’ve just begun to follow your blog and it has truly given me motivation to get my body to the next level. I’ve just joined Crossfit and the workouts are pretty gnarly but the results are totally worth it. I’m a reporter for a local station in Florida and there has been a recent headline in the news that I localized that I would love to hear your opinion on ( and others as well). There was a news anchor in Wisconsin who devoted a four minute block to her newscasts attacking a “bully” who wrote the station to encourage her to set an example for her community and lose weight. She is a very overweight woman who anchors a very prominent show, so the viewer complained that she was setting a bad example for young children in her viewing area. In the news industry and in the acting industry( one that you know well), there is an overwhelming pressure to “look the part.” It’s hard to get a job if you don’t look good on camera. What’s your opinion on this issue? Yes, in your blog, you said that it’s very important for EVERYONE to get off the couch and get control of their lives. But she says we need to teach our children to be kind and to not call people fatties and to not be critical of physical appearances. I personally think she is wrong. It’s part of her job to up keep her figure. And it’s not her job to make herself the news. Since this was such a national topic of discussion, I thought this particularly pertains to your blog post and am very interested to see your thoughts on this case. Thank you for taking the time to write this blog and inspire those like me who need that extra push to join the 5%.
Here’s the anchor’s 4 minute rant-
I met Sean in Austin which was a big treat for me and I was very impressed with the care and attention he gave each of his fans. Obviously he cares, he isn’t taking the time to try to get people to open their eyes because he thinks he’s superior. His use of words like ‘fattie’ yes they are jarring but they need to be to get people to really look at who they have become. I’m not going to lie I’ve crushed on Flanery since high school an never once thought if I got to meet him I would have a picture with him I wouldn’t even want to look at. I mean really when your standing next to that beautiful you don’t want to be a foot shorter and twice as wide. I hadn’t taken a picture in so long while I knew I’d gain I hadn’t realized it was that out of control. Over the years I have perfected the art of focusing on my family and ignoring myself. His words and living by example have motivated me to want to take control of myself and my body. To love myself as much as I love others and to start taking care of myself. I don’t know if he will remember but when I met him I had a new baby (4 weeks he was early) and an 11 month old, along with an 8 year old and 11 year old, all boys. He met my 11 month old. That’s right two kids under a year and I am bigger than I have ever been. I hope in 6-12 months, after what ever changes happen from a healthier more active lifestyle, I get a chance to show him the picture we took last month and be able to say. You helped me make this change, your words gave me the encouragement I needed to want to be a a healthier and happier me. Thank you for the jarring honesty.
Thanks for another great blog Sean! I pushed it a little too hard for a while and my back injury told me to slow down a bit. The problem is that slowing down makes it so easy to use the excuse to go back to old habits. This is the perfect forum to proclaim that I will not let temptation get the better of me. My progress may be a bit slower right now but it is positive progress and I will not stop moving forward. Your no nonsense blogs help so much in keeping the demons at bay. Bless you for your kind caring heart!
As I do respect that you have your own opinions, I think the main reason you hate on over weight people is that you have never been one yourself. Maybe there is something about yourself you don’t like so you feel the need to pick on other people?
I will lose weight. I will never be a super model skinny girl, but I will one day be healthy and I will do it for me. Not because someone else wants me to.
Remember, you can get bitter, or you can get better… but you can’t get both.
Wow,I like that… I will have to use those words in my life on those days when bitter wants to creeps in. Thank you for those simple but true words.
Hey all….I may be late to the party with this one, but I just saw this video for the first time this weekend and I had to share it here! It’s so amazing, and so inspirational. And most importantly it should remind all of us that if you truly want to do something YOU can and will do it! The only thing that will ever stop you from achieving your goals IS YOU. This man’s transformation is amazing, it brought tears to my eyes.
You can have all the tools you need in order to get healthy, but the power of your mind and your will to want to get to your goal are the strongest tools in the toolbox.
I love the way Sean basically bitch-slaps us for our own good.
I’ve got Fibromyalgia, which can make exercising pure hell, but I do the best I can..even if it’s just spending an hour slowly walking my dog around the neighborhood and I try to eat as healthy as I can. Sometimes it’s the little decisions that can help too.. cook the food in the oven instead of the fryer, walk to the shop at the end of the street instead of letting someone else go for me.. etc. Take the baby steps and after a while, it gets easier to stride.
Of course, I still have my days where I can’t even get out of bed, but I try to make it for it when I feel better. I struggle on through my days where I feel like I’m 80 and look forward to my days when I feel my 32 years
I would hope that none of what you’ve said is meant to degrade those who are overweight for the sake of hatefulness or cruelty, but to motivate those that are overweight to become healthy and active to lengthen their life line and improve their quality of life. I’m a physical therapist asst and I see stroke patients daily and the ages are getting younger all the time. I believe this is really the point to your truthfulness….to put real life probabilities to their poor health choices. I found inspiration I’ve been searching for that I haven’t been able to find within myself…So Thank you!
Just wanted to let you know that I have gotten rid of 2 of my BDM triggers. First I have started exercising to a program that I ordered through late night TV and have lost 25 pounds in the first 2 months. I also got rid of the Boyfriend who I kept allowing to take my dreams and piss on them. So there is one BDM issue I have yet to deal with and that is the cigarettes. I will get there….sooner rather than later. Thank you for telling it like it is. Wake up call was definitely needed.
Hi Sean! Bueno, voy a publicar mi comentario en español ya que es mi idioma. Hace poco tengo twitter y si bien empece siguiendo tu carrera como actor por TBS debo reconocer que me empeze a interesar mas por tu escritura, la cual me encanta.
En mi opinion lo que puedo decir es que me encantaron tus palabras. Yo siempre tuve problemas de sobrepeso y a los 18 años llegue a tener 25kgs demas. En cualquier etapa de la vida de una persona es feo estar gordo, uno se siente mal, no quiere salir, se niega a ver las cosas como son hasta que la cabeza hace un click (por lo menos en mi caso). En un año, comiendo bien y saliendo a caminar o a andar en bicicleta logre llegar a mi peso. Fue todo merito mio y la verdad es que valio la pena. Se que es un tema delicado y doloroso y por eso muchas personas pueden ofenderse pero creo que tus palabras son las correctas y te admiro por eso 🙂
Sos una gran inspiracion Sean! Nunca pares!
Kisses from Argentina xxx
My heart is broken. I am sure you mean well but yeah that was,I’ll just go now.
I publicly declare to embark on being part of the 5.000000285%! Yup I’m a fattie, and the self delusions and self sabotage stop here. I’ve let pain be a crutch of avoidance. I’ve kicked substances, tobacco, booze and sugar now it’s time to move. In my best Christopher Walken I say to those in my way (including my personalized Shitty Committee) *uck em. You heard me. To the “puppy” next to the spoon…I see you! (Resident evil skinless, head splitting freak!) Hey you in the mirror! I need more cowbell! Bring it. Shine, until tomorrow!
Hi Sean, I agree in 100% with you. To be overweight is so dangerous and your story about the puppy and the grizzly was great. I´m overweight too but I lost over 12 kilos in the last 8 months and I´m continue to loose more! I also start sports again. The first step I did was to stay away from candy, sodas and chips and fastfood. After a while I felt that it´s good for me. So I will continue the battle til I reach my goal. And all I can say when it comes to overweight people is: Ladies and Gentlemen, you are lying against yourself! Get your butt up, go out, start sports again and give a fucking damn when they look at you while you doing sports! It´s for YOU not for THEM! Your bones will be in real trouble if you don´t DO something against the kilos! So STAND UP DAMIT! ALL OF YOU! And to you Sean…..you did a great job with the worsd you said! 😉
So I’m a couple of months late here…But felt compelled to weigh in.
I am a fattie. Was I always one? No, of course not. Will I always be one? Hell no.
I come from a family that loves food. I was raised in a carb-loving atmosphere where money was tight so food left on the plate at the end of meals was considered offensive. Could I use this for an excuse? Sure, but then that’d be the childish way of going about things. Instead, I prefer to own my poor lifestyle choices. There’s nothing wrong with me, medically or genetically. The truth of the matter is, as an adult, I became lazy about my dietary needs and the necessary level of exercise I needed in order to “cancel out” that cheeseburger and fries. So now what? It’s simple, to me, really. I’ve taken control again. I’ve not eaten fast food in months. I no longer buy things like ice cream, instead I go for the occasional frozen yogurt. I no longer buy sweets and candies. If I’m craving something sweet, I eat an orange or a bit of pineapple. As much as the dietary changes helped, it wasn’t enough. I made the decision for myself; I would no longer live a sedentary lifestyle. Joining a gym wasn’t an option, due to finances. But you know what, I started walking. And then, after saving up for a couple paychecks, I went out and bought a bicycle. That was in January. And since January 11th, I’ve dropped almost two whole pant sizes. I don’t know how much weight I’ve actually lost, as I’m in it for my health, not to get down to some redundant, magical, number. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m still plump, but I feel great and I look forward to the day that I reach the twenty-mile mark on one of my daily bike rides.
This particular blog has spurred me to action, and I will read it everyday to stay motivated and be the 5%. Eloquent, and not at all offensive (good lord people, get over it) it feels as though it was written for me. Some odd things have happened the last month to bring me here, to this blog, and now I know why. To be inspired to change. To take action. To just F-ing do it. And so, I will. No regrets, no anger; only optimism that I can attain that which I believe. No excuses. So, I’m going to read it one more time, turn off the computer, and get my fat ass to work. Thank you Sean, and I can’t help but F-ing love you.
I’m a late comer to the blog…but glad I have found it. Oh how worked up people are getting and focusing on the usage of the term “fattie.” Missing the point of the blog? I think they are. No matter how you word it: fat, fattie, obese, morbidly obese, chunky……someone somewhere will be hurt or offended. I think it’s because the truth hurts. No one likes their flaws/faults/failures pointed out to them. I know I don’t. And yes, I’m one of the fatties that fall into the 95%. Sad but true. I know I can do something about it, and I have in the past, my problem has been sticking to it and keeping motivated. I always seem to find the right excuse to not exercise and be lazy. And yes I do have hypothyroidism, but that is not what made me fat. I made myself fat. My hypothyroidism didn’t shove the donut in my mouth…I did. The only one I can blame is myself. It helps to know there are people out there like Sean who will not candy coat ( bad usage of words. Laughs ) and be blunt and tell you how it is. I need my ass kicked into gear and I find it refreshing to read the thoughts of someone who is not afraid to speak up. He’s not doing it to be mean…he’s doing it to motivate and help people. It will take more for me to get the ball rolling but yes this is a nudge in the right direction that I have needed. Thank you for the wake up call Sean and way to put it into perspective.
Sean I just wanted to thank you for this. I just found this blog threw your Twitter the other day. I spent the last few days going threw it and this one in particular speaks to me. I have battled my weight my whole life (a really long time). I don’t believe it’s genetics. I believe it’s me, me being lazy. I can admit it. IT’S ALL MY FAULT!!!! I have no one to blame but me. Now it’s time for me to fix it.
I actually started working on this the last couple of months. My parents will be married 50 years in January. We are having a party for them. I am from Texas (Pasadena, right down the street from Sugarland) and haven’t been home in a few years. I was thinner then last time there, but not by much. Anyway I really don’t want to go home even heavier than the last time I was there. So I decided to start doing something about it. I have lost about 13lbs so far and have many, many more to go.
I would like to be down another 50 lbs before then. I’m tuning 50 in just a couple of years, (I’m just short of being 2 months younger than you so you know how long I have, LOL) and I want to be at my goal weight by then. I just don’t want to be fat anymore, nor do I want to go into my 50’s being that way. So I will be coming here often and re reading what you have said to motivate me and keep me going.
I really like that you call a spade a spade and don’t sugar coat it and that’s really what I need. So thanks again darlin and I look forward to more blogs from you. 😉
Oh my god! Why must so many people comment that the word “fattie” is offensive. It was meant to be offensive! It was so that we could see the cold hard truth in front of us and have it slap us in the face. Ignorance is going to get you know where in life so why don’t people start accepting the truth. If you don’t like it do something about it! I loved this blog post by the way Sean. 🙂
Hi Sean. I’m late to the party….I am fat. I take no offense to your post. I have battled with my weight my ENTIRE life. I could blame a lot of things but I won’t. I take responsibility. But after 30+ years numerous diets, nutritionists and other stuff, I’m finally starting to lose the fat. Why: I was diagnosed with sleep apnea (I stop breathing when I sleep). My weight contributes to the apnea. Having SA males it harder to lose weight. Now undergoing CPAP therapy, I am doing well. I hope to reach my body fat % goal within 16 months. Thank you for the reality check in. Much love.
You know at first I was upset not because of the word fattie, I could care less, but because I was worried that you didn’t like people who are fat, that would make me sad because I am fat, overweight, pudgy, fluffy, all those names. And i would hate for someone that i adore to dislike me before they even met me. But I love how I look and I have tons of confidence in myself. To me this is better than being “skinny” because I love me. Honestly I don’t always make healthy choices, what can I say I’m human I make mistakes but I work on being healthy and active to make a good example for my little siblings. I want them to realize that as long as they love themselves and make healthy decisions, it doesn’t matter what they look like.
After reading so many of other people’s comments I realized what you really were trying to get us to understand *sorry I’m not always the brightest crayon in the box* and it made me feel tons better. But I want to say to those who have had a negative response to the blog post *if anyone reads this comment* you should really think before you comment, Sean is very active about being healthy because he wants better for us not because he wants to put us down and rip us apart. Sometimes in life you need someone to take a direct approach to a problem and Sean is doing more than so many other celebrities do by interacting with us and actually caring. In my book Sean is amazing for this so really people next time before you respond with anger take a deep breath and think.
I totally agree with you Stephanie, and your right, sometimes we just need a swift kick in the butt to get us going and that’s what Sean is doing. 😉 I know I needed that kick. LOL
BTW Stephanie, good job on being positive and loving your self. Something I haven’t learned yet.
Every other day I run/walk at least two to three miles. The days I don’t I do light weight training.
Twice a month I do a 10k fast paced walk.
As for food, I don’t sit and eat ice cream or fast food. In fact I barely even use salt.
Am I losing weight…nope.. I gained two pounds in fact. And I do not smoke and barely ever drink.
Am I making excuses, not working hard enough? Do share…
If your intention is to lose weight and you are unsuccessful, then you are either eating too many calories, not burning enough… or both.
I will keep that in mind. I decided to cut certain foods from my diet and reduced the amount I eat. On a better note I did drop two inches from my waist. Ever since I stopped smoking two years ago I have been making better choices.
That is beautiful! Congratulations & keep up the good work! -S
I’m so glad I found your blog in this moment. A couple years ago, I accidentally lost 75 pounds(seriously, it was an accident. Though, I’m glad it happened, because it has sparked something in me). Yesterday, I started a challenge to eat clean and work out routinely. As I read this on my lunch break, I feel inspired by your post and don’t feel one ounce guilty about the chicken, roasted green veggies, and liter of water sitting in front of me. Keep being awesome Sean.
Sometime ago I had to lower my cholesterol level and so I had to change my diet a little bit. The first 3 weeks I lost more than 15 pounds. Than the waight loss slowed down and now after 3 months it stopped at a little above 24 pounds. But my diet consists mostly of boiled chicken witch vegetables or spinach souce, and raw veggies or mouslie for brekfast and supper.Sometime ago I had to lower my cholesterol level and so I had to change my diet a little bit. The first 3 weeks I lost more than 15 pounds. Than the weight loss slowed down and now after 3 months it stopped at a little above 24 pounds. But my diet consists mostly of boiled chicken witch vegetables or spinach sauce, and raw veggies or muesli for breakfast and supper. One day I took the time and counted the calories for the meals I ate during the day. And now I know why I stopped loosing weight. My organism is cumulating energy instead of burning it I consume 450 – 600 kcal a day. And I still weight almost way too much.
I’m so glad I can include myself in the 5% and growing percentage….your motivation & encouragement got me on the right track (30lbs gone & almost to my goal) and I feel soooo much better, physcially and emotionally, you’re right ‘pleasure’ does come with accomplishment, feeling better about yourself and having others compliment you on your success is gratifying and happiness fills you, no more ‘excuses’ …..thanks so much and much love
I so agree with this when I quit smoking I had to change my life to not wanna a cigarette any more it’s been 11 months and I am glad I stopped smoking but I made a mistake instead of smoking I was eating and went from 190 to 250 lb and was sick because of the weight gain I am diabetic now and taking a pill for that two times a day plus pills for other illness because of the weight gain so I started reading what you wrote on here and started changing sence june I have lost weight around 25 lb I been eating good no more eating sweet stuff all the time stopped drinking soda and when I went to the doctor today I am under 250 lb it feels great and we are talking about a better diet for me to try for myson and I because now my son is on a diet to and exercising with me thank you sean for doing what you do for people you are a great person
Ok, so here’s the thing…Sean, I love your writing and I love how you are rough and to the point. I am one of these people you are talking about. Hearing someone call you fat is hurtful but lets face it, If you’re a fattie like me, it ain’t a fuckin’ secret. Why be offended? Sean is trying to tell us that we don’t have to be. He’s not saying that all fat people are sick. He’s saying that having that weight on your body is going to cause things like heart attacks and diabetes. He’s using harsh truths and words to show us a harsh reality. I guarantee you he knows why people are fat including psychological reasons and thyroid problems and slow metabolism. This post is about bringing us hope. We don’t have to be fat. Let me tell you, I used to be a size 8 in college. Then I was on and off Chemo for 6 years and I also had to take a drug (for 3 months) while I was on Chemo where I had to eat 20 grams of fat with each dose every 8 hours. Plus, I had to eat my regular meals so I could get all my nutrients and vitamins. I hated food at that point. I gained so much weight. I had to eat it though, because that’s how I was going to get the Hep C to leave my body. I have been cured and off treatment for a year and a half now. I still carry the weight. I know how to lose weight and I choose not to do the things I need to do. I look for quick fixes like pills and serums when I know none of those things work. The only thing that works is a lifestyle change. Weight Watchers works and you can eat anything you want. I’ve done it two times, hit a plateau and quit. Just diet isn’t enough, though. You have to move your body. It has to be diet and exercise together. Not just one or the other. Excuses like meds, mental state and illness are just excuses…You use those things as excuses, you are letting circumstances beat you down. Your medicines, illnesses and depression don’t own you so don’t let them rule you! Beat that shit down and overcome the obstacles. My weight and excuses have held me back, but right now I feel fucking pumped up that I am going to change that. I’m making a commitment to myself to start going to the gym (been paying for that membership anyway). I am not gonna let any of these bull shit excuses get in my way any longer. I’m gonna do it. This shit is on!
Hello Sean Patrick, first time poster here. Just found your blog and I think your posts about health are very inspirational; tough-love and in-your-face, but inspirational nonetheless. Your post about the excuses we make is spot on. What I wanted to ask you is: are you willing to take your mission for better health one step further? There are many documentaries on Netflix about big agriculture, the food industry, government policies regarding such, and the effects it all has on our health. You are right about us needing to take responsibility for our actions and attitude, but you can’t ignore the fact that companies and gov have a big impact on our health. Producers of soy/corn receive an unfair amount of gov subsidies over those that grow produce (and all unhealthy food made from soy/corn is cheap). Couple that with fees that are charged to organic producers in order for them to use the certified organic label, and most middle and low income families are reaching for the junk food. You have the notoriety and gravitas to make a real change in our county, along with your famous friends. You obviously care about the general health and well-being of those around you. Will you use your power for good? ~ ^_^ A Humble Admirer
I do have to say, after going through your blog once more after about a year I am glad a lot of your words have stuck with me and that I have been able to implement a lot of them into my everyday life.
I am one of those fat people, but I wasn’t always. Growing up I would find ways to make myself stay active including soccer, gymnastics, and musical theatre up until starting college in 2012. When I was diagnosed with Rhabdomyosarcoma, I didn’t have as much energy, nor the want to continue with school, work, or every day things. I was put on a high calorie/ high protein diet by my doctors, and I’ve realized how much I screwed up by taking those words to mean “eat anything and everything that could possibly be bad and that doesn’t make you sick.” I finished chemotherapy in June, and started a journey to be healthier soon after. I joined BJJ and started walking around campus more than usual and than I have been able to. I dropped 30 lbs within a few months, but I haven’t gotten into a lifestyle I want yet.
Sadly, since the end of November, I have had to stop training in preparation for another bone marrow transplant, but once I have gotten the clear go ahead, I plan to make 2015 the year of no excuses while I am overseas. I plan to get myself on a better track, study harder, and it won’t just be a “new years resolution” it will be my dream I will not stop chasing and can’t stop thinking about.
Thank you for your words Mr. Flanery. I’m thankful you take time out to encourage others in the best way possible by being brutally honest.I wish you the happiest Christmas and most wonderful New Year.
I said I would make 2015 the year of no excuses and not just a new years resolution. Seemingly empty words for a rather rocky beginning to a new year. Yet, here I am at the start of 2016 looking back on the message I wrote to you, 70 lbs lost and still going strong. I’m no where near where I’d like to be but the simple changes of getting off the sofa, not whinging about life, and accepting that I personally had to make the changes I was seeking have made this past year fly by and have actually made saying yes to new things a lot easier. I went sky diving for the first time and bungee jumping, the things that initially I was too fat to even blink an eye while saying ‘absolutely not a chance’ when proposed to me by friends. I flew to Iceland and hiked in the bitter cold to see some of the amazing natural beauty they have. In Scotland, I was able to hike the Old Man of Storr and live my dream of taking the same picture my grandfather had from when he first visited the Highlands when he was my age. I couldn’t have done it without a change in how I thought of my health because even though I have cancer, even though I have thyroid issues, even though health issues add up and continue to, I had the choice to add another limitation to my life by putting pressure on my joints and my internal organs for carrying so much weight and simply not moving and being sedentary and reminding myself of this blog post during difficult times has resulted in one of the best years of my life thus far.
Thank you Mr. Flanery, and here’s to a happier, healthier, and even more inspiring 2016 all around as I help others on their way into a better lifestyle in my newest job. Cannot wait for what more is to come. xx Saoirse R.
Wow, that’s amazing! Here’s to continued healthy living and success in everything. God bless.
I know this is an old post but again I just found your blog. After reading the comments I only had one thing that kept popping up in my mind, many repeat that they are dieting and working out and not losing weight and it’s never mentioned that muscle weighs more than fat. As we go on the journey to get healthy and in shape, it’s more than the number on the scale it is the inches some mention and ultimately the way you feel better. Sorry just a kind of hey no one mentioned this fact.
Thank you for mentioning that. I hadn’t seen anyone else say it either…
And no one has mentioned the person who CANNOT physically move due to paralysis. Are they CHOOSING death, too?
Okay… been thinking since I read this post: “Am I mad because he’s telling truth?”
I often get mad when people speak a truth I don’t want to hear.
I think I’m mad for SOME of what he says is true for SOME people. There are always exceptions. And not the same as excuses.
I think Mr. Flanery suffers from the Dunning-Kruger effect, only instead of it being about cognition and intelligence, it’s about someone’s weight.
I haven’t figured out why I find you insightful and inspirational, but I do. I will worry about why another day. As I’m reading this,I keep picturing my mother, who died from diabetes and kidney failure, and I keep thinking yes! If only she had done as she was supposed to, she would still be alive. And suddenly I did a mental head sleep. I am my mother! I’m obese(not a word I like, but if you can call a spade a spade, so can I) and I smoke. I have figured out two things. I want to love myself and I don’t want to die. You have helped me cut through the bullshit excuses I use daily and realize that this isn’t ok. I’m not ok. Thank you for telling me the way it is. Hopefully I will be able to report progress on the real me(notice I didn’t say new me). I like me, wouldn’t care for a new me, but I want to love me. That’s my goal.
I think this us fabulous. And I’ve tried numerous things. But sadly I have a lot of shit that likes to get in my way. If I could tell you my ducky terrible story, think you can help me? Maybe pm me on twitter or something. I’m dedicated and ready. I don’t have much to loose, I just have no muscle mass. I swear 20lbs of what I have are my boobs!! Lol. But seriously, I’ve talked to trainers and they just push push push. My body isn’t capable of that. I’m sick. Like sick sick. Hit me up! I would love to hear what you think! And to be happy in my skin would be fabulous.
Ok, so here goes. I am almost 60 and I was active at work until about 3 years ago. My work was suddenly gone because of a medical condition. 60 to 0 in an instant. I quit on myself and everyone said, you should just rest and take it easy. When I started to pack on weight, nobody said anything about it. I wish someone like you had been there then to tell it to me straight. I had already started to lose weight and eat right before I found this. I read this now on the days I need someone to tell it to me straight. Just please keep doing that and I will keep reading. I have multiple medical conditions including Hypothyroidism and Meniere’s disease and I could give you many reasons to sit on my butt and do nothing. I am done with excuses. Thank you for being a straight shooter. I need that.
I definitely need an ass kicker, but a sensitive one.. Does that even exhist?! Lol! I have a few autoimmune diseases plus Rheumatoid Arthritis and Fibromyalgia (and some lung, heart, and kidney issues as well..) But I’m honestly doing fabulous! And I love who I am and what I’ve Ben through and continue to go through in my life. I can handle this. I got this. I am thankful for every day. But with that being said.. Fuck.. Prednisone.. I went from an unhealthy 108 to an unhealthy 148!! Ugh.. I need help getting to the 120’s. I wish I lived by you. I demand you help me! We could help each other! that being said.. I wouldn’t say no to online coaching! Lol. You crack me up. I need that. If the people I talk to/work with don’t laugh at me.. We aren’t gonna work out! Srsly.
Even baby steps are something. I’m taking a walk on this fabulous night with my four legged monster. One would think working five twelves would be enough.. Aparently not. the frogs are freaking him out. Whoever said pit bulls are bad asses was never blessed enough to be owened by one!
They are indeed a very loving breed.
This story is quite straight forward & really makes you think. As I was reading it I was thinking a lot of what you said could be applied to different aspects of my life. Thanks for writing the brutal truth that we may not want to hear but need to.