Link for PART ONE: Click HERE.
Disclaimer: No Norman Reedus’ were harmed in the unfolding of this glorious plot. Norman Reedus is my homeboy… and this is just what homeboys do.
So where were we? Oh yeah, we’re at a Wizard World event in Nashville, TN… and the “Stein” is almost hyperventilating in my bathroom waiting patiently for me to come save him, while I’m doing absolutely nothing… completely sprawled out & free styling on the bed as I say the following to him on the phone, with full commitment, as if the academy would be voting on my performance:
“Just stay with me, brother! I’m coming, but in the meantime, lemme get connected to his damn TV. Any second now. Hang on, hang on, gimme a sec… and BOOM. Got it. Okay, the passwords are in for the hotel’s DirecTV account, I’ve got my app open & I’m all plugged in… just searching for the TV that’s cross referenced with the location that your FIND-A-FRIEND is giving me… any moment… any moment… and I’M IN!!.”
Reedenstein: “Goddam dude, I swear to God, you are fucking Kojack!!”
Me: “No, bro… this shit is WAY beyond Kojack.”
Reedenstein: “Fuckin’ Magnum P.I. then!”
Me: “Fuck Magnum… if you’d have called him, you’d be dead by now.”
Reedenstein: “Yeah, you’re prolly right. Fuck him. I heard that Higgin’s was the brains anyway. Hey, remember that fucker’s doberman’s? Zeus and Apollo? And T.C. with that tiny little chopper that he just fucking RAGED all over Hawaii with, like he fucking owned it. Yeah, fuck Magnum! I’m sorry, bro… I wouldn’a called him. Hey, are you close?”
Me: “My polka dot’s getting closer and closer. Hang tight & let’s reprogram this fucker. Tell me if you hear the channels changing.”
So, I hit the up button, and start climbing the channels.
Reedenstein: “Holy fuck, it’s working! I can hear the channels changing-WAIT!! Can you go back? I just heard Duck Dynasty! Fuck, Phil kicks ass! Have you ever met him, bro?”
Me: “No, but I’m digging your “Stein” science… let’s give Scary Boots get an earful of ol’ Phil & see if that get’s him off the “killing by the lake” plan.”
Reedenstein: “How long you think it took him to grow that beard, man? OH SHIT, he’s in full Pastor-mode! I can hear it. Phil’s doling out some scripture! I knew I could count on Phil!!
Me: “Okay, you gotta listen to me now. Here’s the plan. I’m gonna turn the volume up on the TV so loud that security will come up there and tell him to turn it down. When you hear the knock on the door…bolt!!! BUT… it might take a while for a complaint to go through, so, in the meantime… let’s order you some room service. I’m downstairs right now, but I can’t get to the floor that my FIND-A-FRIEND is indicating without a room key. Door guy’s down here by the elevators like he’s fancy club regulatin’ and my boots ain’t dress code ready—I MEAN MY SNEAKERS… yeah, my sneakers. Anyway, let’s at least get you fed. You want some chicken fingers?”
Reedenstein: “Yeah, with BBQ sauce. And a Coke.”
Me: “Alright, it’s on the way. Scary Boots won’t even hear the door with the volume up so loud & I’ll tell room service to just open the door and set it right inside and leave. When you see the tray dropped off from under the door crack… reach out and pull it in as fast as you can and then lock the door again immediately! But hopefully Phil can talk this fucker off the killing ledge.”
Reedenstein: “Hey, shouldn’t I just bolt when the room service person get’s here?”
Me: “Fuck no, those delivery idiots aren’t combat ready! Remember, patience equals preservation.”
Holy shit!, even I didn’t know what that meant.
Reedenstein: “Yeah, you’re right.”
Now, at this point even I started to drift while I was waiting for the room service & we just chatted about nonsense… chicks… motorcycles… business… chicks again… it always comes back to chicks. That is, until I saw the Skittles and M&M’s sitting there.
Throughout the entire conversation after that sight, I carefully made a tiny incision with the blade of my Leatherman right in the middle of that bag of M&M’s. Then, I gently squeezed a single Skittle inside the bag, and placed a tiny sliver of Scotch tape on the incision. I never even scrubbed up… but my operation was now complete. I tip-toed over to the door, and placed the edge of the bag of M&M’s just underneath the closest side, so if he looked underneath again… he’d see it. Then, I climbed back on the bed, threw a bag of Famous Amos chocolate chips against the wall that faced the bathroom door, and waited.
Reedenstein: “I just heard something smash! Hang on a second, I gotta look under & see what happened.”
I left the relaxing headboard and crouched my head down by the foot of the bed to peer around to the bathroom door, and sure enough… the bag of M&M’s was yanked under the door and out of my sight. I waited.
Reedenstein: “I think the guy just IED’d his mini-bar! But, I scavenged a bag of M&M’s that landed just outside the door. I’m gonna hors d’oeuvre on this shit before my fingers get here. Fuck this guy. He can make due on the Pringles for all I care.”
And there was that feeling again, the one I get during all of life’s extremes.
My GOD, my BALLS are even starting to tingle, I’m thinking, as I stifled the kind of explosive laughter that usually breaks blood vessels & gives little homies hernias. “Of course they are, my son. That’s by design” came immediately and instantaneously, as something always does when I inadvertently address him. “That’s where I put my message board to you, right by your legacy… so you’ll pay attention, you understand. Hang on, Phil’s calling.”, he said. Yeah, I figured there was a reason… and I wasn’t complaining, just so you know, I thought. And then I saw that he was right, as usual… Phil WAS calling him.
… on the TV. And I turned the volume up even louder.
Reedenstein: “Perfect timing, too! I can hear them about to eat, and Phil’s saying grace! I’m gonna join him with my appetizer of M&M’s while I wait for my supper snacks.”
The “Stein” was KILLING me, but I managed to slip out a monotone:
“Yeah, you get down on those baby’s. Fingers & sauce should be there any minute.”
Through the phone, I could hear the bag rip open. Then, what sounded like hundreds of M&M’s hitting his teeth… and then just crunching. Lord almighty, this fucker was fiending on those babies like a fucking famished eight year-old that’s never seen the first aisle of a 7-11. By the way it sounded, even I hadn’t ever enjoyed an M&M like this fucker. That is, until I hear him cry out:
I heard gagging, spitting and coughing coming from the bathroom, while my chest was HEAVING with contained hilarity. But I DID manage a somewhat believable:
“What the fuck man! You alright?”
Reedenstein: “Oh God! Fucker put something in the M&M’s! Taste like Mr. Clean or something! It’s really tart man, even made my butt cheeks pucker up a little bit! You gotta fuckin’ hurry!!!”
As he kept rambling on, I finally hit “send” on a text message that I had been writing from my TextPlus app, which is an app that will allow you to send text messages to anyone from a unique number other than your own. The text message read:
YOU HAVE BEEN DOSED WITH A COMA INDUCING AMOUNT OF ISOPROBYL CHLORIS REEDENSIDE. IT WILL TAKE AFFECT IN APPROXIMATELY 30 MINUTES. YOUR OPTIONS ARE AS FOLLOWS:
A) SLEEP THROUGH MY DEPRAVED & VIOLATING BEHAVIOR.
B) COME OUTSIDE, AND ENJOY IT CONSCIOUSLY. A SIMPLE INGREDIENT IN REDBULL CALLED TAURINE WILL COUNTERACT THE CHEMICAL IMMEDIATELY. I HAVE A CAN WAITING. TEXT BACK A SINGLE LETTER INDICATING YOUR INTENTION.
PS I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT ALL MY LIFE, HOLD ON. I CAN FEEL IT IN THE AIR TONIGHT, HOLD ON.
I wait… and then I hear the “ding” of a text delivery coming from the bathroom. I climb off the bed, take my boots off and place them directly outside and facing the bathroom door. I wait… and wait, as I’m sure he’s reading, until he explodes with:
“FUCK YOU, MOTHERFUCKER!!! FLANERY’S COMING RIGHT NOW, AND HE WILL FUCKING CHOKE YOU LIFELESS!!!”
Then back to me, with:
“Dude, swear to God, the fucker just sent me a text. How’d this sick fuck get my number??? You gotta hurry man!!! He doped me up man, and I can already feel it taking affect. Hey, can you also bring me some RedBull???”
What will happen to the “Stein”? Will he get violated in a way unbecoming of a “Stein”? …And what was on the legacy’s message board? Be sure to subscribe to ShineUntilTomorrow at the upper right for the exciting conclusion of “The Flannenbaum & Reedenstein Chronicles” aka “This Might Or Might Not Have Ever Even Happened”.
And be sure to leave a comment of your thoughts!
For PART 4… click HERE.
-Sean Patrick Flanery
Oh lord, this is getting crazier everytime! Hahahahaha! I scared my cat with my loud laughter XD
omg lmao! this is just the best!
LOL you know what? I bet he WOULD play a prank like this, just for the hell of it…
I would say his antics land him square in the chaotic neutral category.
LOL I can’t wait to read more, this is fantastic! Awesome writing!
Classic! Can’t wait for the final chapter!
AHHHH!! There’s a part 4?! 😉 Magnum PI! Duck Dynasty! Genesis quotes! SKITTLES. This is awesome! Can’t wait for the next part. Thank you for making Monday better with your story! 🙂
EERRRRMAAAHHGERRDDD!! I am dying! Literally dying of laughter!
**SEAN, can you PLEASE send me some redbull???? 😉
Mischievous double stacked leprechaun you be!
You both are awesome! Great meeting you in Tulsa! Thanks again for haunting my nightmares with your song and dance in the photo op room!
honestly these stories are amazing; whether fiction or non-fiction I have a feeling these types of things happen a lot to you guys. I can’t wait to read more; I hope you publish something soon of all you and reedus moments. make the flandus never end
Oh googly moogly… I just nearly pissed myself laughing at that. One of my co-workers asked what was so funny, but then he was on the floor laughing after reading it. Seriously can’t wait until the next episode
Oh my God….can I hang out with you ? Lol you guys crack me up
Oh my God!!! This is hilarious! I would love to party with you two!!
I love this sean you are so great at telling a story
Clutch my pearls,.. I love it! Having a bad Monday and this makes it soo much better.
OMG!!! Sean I would LUV u to read me bed time stories!!! Love ur stories and ur writing keeps me on my toes!! Can’t wait for Part 4 #Reeduslockedinthebathroom ❤️❤️❤️❤️
OMG!!! Sean I would LUV u to read me bed time stories!!! Love ur stories and ur writing keeps me on my toes!! Can’t wait for Part 4 #Reeduslockedinthebathroom ❤️❤️❤️❤️
Here’s a thought — this should be made into a mini-book, and then the proceeds of the sales of it could go to your favorite charity. It’s THAT good/funny. And I bet it would sell a lot! 🙂
Ok, seriously Sean, I have never laughed so hard in my life. Brilliant.
Oh dear Lord! I am starting to feel sorry for Reedus. That poor guy thinks he is getting tortured and killed and all he thinks of is his hero Flanery saving him. But latter it the one that tortures him with M&Ms and some weird messages. Dude, I don’t want to know what you do to your enemies when you fool a friend like that.
This story is getting better and better. Thank you for that Sean and thank you for your awesomeness. 🙂
Oh for the love of Flandus!!! This just gets better and better
I do believe a Flanery,Reedus,Tyson karaoke sing-along to “In The Air Tonight” is now in order
I’m literally out of oxigen for too much laughing!!!!
OH. EMM. GEE. I haven’t laughed that freaking hard since part 2!!! Holy Crap, dude!!! I literally have tears!! Thank you so much!!! This made my Monday!!!
Lol red bull gives you ‘wings’
Balls tingling, butt cheeks puckering, Red Bull, M&Ms, and Skittles will never have the same meaning…I love this, I will be disappointed when it ends but I’m sure you have lots more to share with us in the future, I absolutely love reading everything you write!! Id love to spend 5 minutes in your head but I may not want to leave, you are a genius…Bravo!!
OH COME ON!!! Ur killing us man! Each one is getting better and better but the suspense is killing me! Plz give us the next chpt soon!
omg!! so good!!! thanks for that!! i hope it’s fucking real!!! can’t wait for the next ♥
You need to stop! I’m dying! #YouCantMakeThisUpIfYouTried
A skittle in a bag of M&Ms.. “…even made my butt cheeks pucker up a little bit!”
Me: *dying of laughter*
Genius, Sean. Fucking genius!
This is GOLD. So hilarious!!! The pictures were fantastic too!!! LOL! I can’t wait to read what happens!!!!
HA!!!!! This is epic!! You should really teach seminars on how to mess with people!! I can’t watch the Walking Dead now without giggling a little bit anytime Norman comes on the screen! Well done my friend. Can’t wait for the conclusion. 🙂
ROFLMAO!!! *note to self… bring Reedus a can of redbull at next meet and greet*
I fecking think this is the coyote story of the year , my stomache is gonna be like a washboard , from laughin so hard . Love to you sean , n norman
Oh Sean! You’re so bad! An evil genius! Lol!!
Are you even aware of your own incredible genius?!?! Like really. HA HA!!!!!!
Laughed so loud made everyone look. Thanks!! I needed that. It still feels like I have a silly grin on my face. Your the best.
OMG! Your a genius on the fly! This is so epic! And if you can’t mess with your homeboy, then who the hell can!
I know you say this may or may not have ever even happened, but I truly hope to GAHD it did. I love Reedus, but I NEED for this to be a true story. Is he ALWAYS this easy to prank?!
Glad to see you two are still friends after this. Why are men so cruel when it comes to pranks? Is it a testosterone thing?? LMAO
How is it possible that this story just keeps getting better?!?! Love it!!!
This is great!!! I love it, thank you for sharing can not wait to see what happens
If laughter is the best medicine then this story is the cure for everything. So funny & when I read it I imagine your voice & Reedenstein’s voice & I’m laughing so hard. Thanks for making Monday so much better with Part 3 & can’t wait for Part 4. 😉 Terri / @shineonangel
A story well written. I can see it play out in my brain it is so vivid. Thank you Sean. I adore you
This really needs to be an illustrated book, or cartoon! Best storyteller/prankster ever!
Seriously, I doubt the “Stein” actually remembers the names of Higgins’ dobermans, but you can spin and weave a most awesome tale that definitely entertains Sean!!! Thanks for brining some laughter & light to an otherwise dim day!!
This is awesome. Sean you take my mind of life 🙂
This is the best thing I have read! Absolutely hilarious!! I love how Sean expresses himself in explaining the situation!
Omg please never let it end! Or if it does more insanity must ensue! I love this story.
Hahahahahaha!!!! Genius!!!! I spit my drink out laughing so hard at the “he filed me up man and I can already feel it taking affect”!!!!!! Pure genius!!!! I cannot wait for installment #4!!!!!
I started crying from laughing so hard. Killing me with these sections but thoroughly enjoying them. Cannot wait for the next. (and the ideas of messing with people these are giving me is astounding. >:D )
Love you!!! Thanks for a laugh during a work day that won’t end!
If this actually happened I’m surprised Reedustein is still speaking to you!!!!
I love your story telling. It is always so detailed and colorful. The idea of dosing Norm with a skittle is freaking hilarious.
Your posts always brighten my day, so thank you for the pick me up. I need something like this in my life everyday.
I hope I never, ever, ever get lost in your bathroom.
The skittle was a nice touch. What a masterful way to turn a buddy’s dispair into something truly sublime.
I am a believer… not to be mistaken for a Belieber.
You’re killin me Sean! I’m absolutely loving this story. Keep up the great storytelling.
You are an evil genius (true story or not)! Laughing out loud reading this and for some reason getting the weirdest looks. Love the added artwork. It gives you wings, you know.
Please don’t make us wait too long lol
Thanks for this lmao I really am not sure how I missed it… piles and piles of emails they’ve been lost in I suppose? Hilarious…
Omg I’m dying with laughter right now I can’t wait til you put part 4 out I’m in the edge of my seat.
I read that text message in the voice of Jigsaw. Oh, Lord! P.S. That artwork of Norman eating M&M’s in the bathroom is absolutely amazing!
This keeps getting better and better. You freaking rock Sean! This made my day!
omg absolutely genious!!! makes me sad that I have to wait a whole week for the next one, but its so worth it!! you guys sound like so much fun to hang out with <3 can't stop laughing!
God, I love this so much and I’m pretty sure my neighbours can here my laughing at it.
Bless your twisted little heart I just love you!!
Flannery!!! You have to stop posting when I’m in class!!! Just burst out laughing in the middle of my otherwise silent math class!! Got lectured for five minutes by my teacher then glared at for the next 15 mins as I spontaneously burst into giggles while continuing to read and neglecting my homework!! So worth it though!! This was hilarious!!! You are a fantastic storyteller man!! I cannot wait to read the next part!! Please post soon, but not while I’m in class… I don’t think my teach would like another random giggle fit and possibly giving me detention…
“Alright!!! I love this shit!!!” this is why these are two of my favorite actors…
This is to funny. I had to bury my face in my pillow so I wouldnt wake up the rest of the house, I was laughing so much & so loud.
Thank you Sean, I cant think of a better way to start the week than with some gut wrenching giggling.
hahaha OMG… This is hilarious!! I loved listening to you tell this story yesterday in Tulsa!! You had everybody rolling! I can’t wait for what comes next!! lol :0)
just woke the kids up again i laughed that loud
I can’t believe that just fuckin happened!!!!
Bwahaha, Omg these are totally making Monday a day I look forward to! This Is The Most Evil AND Funny Thing I’ve Read!
Dude this story is fucking hilarious!
Fascinating, funny and so visual. Love it.
It was great to read it after hearing you reading at the Q&A in Tulsa. It’s is the best so far. The pictures you added just kept the imagery going. Thanks for the good laughs. You are such a clue & sweet dud!
“Fuck you. Motherfucker” This simply had my laughing to the point of tears! Well done Sean, well done.
Oh my gosh this is demented, brilliant and hysterical!!!
You are an evil genius! I love it! 😛 Muahahaha I can’t get enough of this.
I’m not gonna lie… I’m kinda hoping this story keeps goin cuz it’s so hilarious! Poor Reedus tho lol… Sean your a genius. Write a book already!
Too funny, Sean! Can’t wait for the next installment! You are the man!
OMG THIS IS TOO GOOD!!! Had to hold my laughter to keep choking on my break snack at work hehehe.
This just gets better and better…
I’m glad you told us this part of the story at the Tulsa panel it was awesome to watch you tell it! I absolutely love your stories!! This one keeps getting better and better!! Never laughed so hard!!
Someone’s going to be getting a lot of red bull & m & m’s at the next few cons. Love it!
This is just the best! Thank you so much for this. Cannot wait for part 4! <3
Sean you are amazing . I love it can’t wait for the end
This is absolutely hysterical! Now to anxiously wait for the next part <3 . You could totally write a book about this stuff!
Holy Mother of God!!!… I cant breath !!!! DYING OVER HERE . Damn Scary Boots!!!
Sweet baby Geezusstein… I am SO doing that to a bag of M&Ms. Then I’m gonna put it in my oldest kids stocking and just wait LOL!
these have me in stitches at work. customers are looking at me like im crazy hahahaahah
LMFAO…I haven’t laughed this hard in a while. I had tears falling because I was cracking up so bad! I love you guys! I can’t wait for the next part! ❤❤
I could totally see him in there crouched like Smokey in Deebo’s chicken coop LOLOL
Yep, I just snorted iced tea out of my nose and my cat is looking at me funny! Love this!
The Phil Collins reference just made me schnarf all over my keyboard! Well done, sir.
These posts should come with a warning: DO NOT ATTEMPT TO IMBIBE ANY LIQUIDS WHILE READING THIS.
Thanks for the laugh Sean you never stop amazing me with your talent for writing and story telling. I love reading your serious blogs but I love this also, how many more parts are there does Norman get his fingers and sauce will he ever see the light of day <3
Remind me not to read these at work
Do not read these at work.
Sean, seriously you are amazing, this made my night!:’3
LOL. This is just what I needed to put the Shine in my day. Thank you for continuing the story. Waiting for the conclusion.
You make my Tuesday (yes it is here 😉 awesome! 😉 can’t wait for part 4!! Love you both for the awesomeness! 🙂
Glad the smiles are international !!!!!
OH MY GODNESS SEAN YOU GONNA GIMME A DAMN HEARTACHE !!! this things go on worse and worse and I can’t even. How the hell Norm can be this innocent. YOU’RE GOING TO HELL FOR THIS! I’m gonna choke so bad from laughing XD
You’re killin me smalls!! HAHA You just ain’t right in the head man but that’s why I love you! Can’t wait to hear the end!!
This would be an awesome short film by the way hahaha!
you officially just had the greatest idea EVER!!!!! Seriously, Sean, you HAVE TO DO THIS!!!!!
Brilliant! Dude, seriously…..funny stuff, can’t wait for the next installment!
Omg! I’m dying from laughter! I cannot wait to read more!
I can certainly see Reedus showing you the true diversity of the word FUCK!!!!
OMFG!!!! Dying, laughing so hard my ribs hurt and I WAS gonna have chicken fingers for dinner WTF?! Dude…chicken soup is starting to look better, less likely to choke out in laughter while eating it.
Great job!!! Keep it going…..
Fantastic as always! This never fails to make my Monday! 🙂
Sweet Baby J! I almost spit out my own Red Bull! LMAO So again we wait patiently….
Omg everytime I think it’s the end it keeps going I was laughing so hard you keep the anticipation going lol.
After the day I have had.. this was great to come home to. I definitely need the laughter. I, however, hate waiting a wait for the next part. Write a book please. I would definitely read it.
Was so privileged to hear you very animatedly and hilariously read us part 3 on the CC panel yesterday. I just read it again and its even funnier. Sir, you have a gift! Can’t wait for 4. Peace!
You are just to much Sean and you ain’t right with all this but it’s also so dam funny loving this story! been awesome following it can’t wait for the epic ending!
Please post soon!
Have I told you lately, that I love you? *HUGS*
Love the sketch! This story is too funny.
Fantastic Sean, waiting in anticipation. By the way, when is your book being released 🙂
Love Aussie fan girl xxx
part 4? Oh no! You can’t leave us hanging like this. Too damn funny! Can’t wait to see how this all ends.
My husband is generally pretty damn good at coming up with this sort of scam to mess with those he loves, but you have him beat. Even better that I am not the target, makes it so much easier to appreciate the evil genius…
OMG this is way too funny! Love your sense of humor. Can’t wait to read part 4
OMG! Laughing so hard I cried! This is AMAZING Sean! Can’t wait for the next part. I’m sharing this with everyone I know!!!
My Co-workers probably think I’m nuts, I’m laughing so hard! Good stuff man, give me more!
I laugh every time I read these… It cracks me up just reading your unique but spot on descriptions.
Surprised you cant hear me laughing all the way from Sydney. this is hilarious. I shouldn’t read your stories at work, my colleagues think I’m nuts! thanks Sean, you definitely made my day!
I can’t stop laughing. I also can’t decide if you are just that creatively twisted or if this is just crazy enough to actually be true. If it is even remotely true, all I can say is Norman better tell us what he dished out as payback for you!
This is great… love the kojack and magnium pi thrown n there…the skittle i the m&ms is too funny
OMG! I spewed soda out of my nose! This is awesome. Will never think of M&M’s and Reedus the same. You are wicked Sean! Can’t wait to see how this ends! Love your scary boots 🙂
Deliciously, deliciously evil, Master Flanery! I said it before and i say now, you are the best storyteller in the history of storytelling… Hugs from Argentina pal. I can’t wait to finally know how this ends!
OH MY GOD!!! I CANNOT STOP LAUGHING! MY KIDS THINK I’VE LOST MY MIND! Does Norman know you’re posting this? Would love to hear the other side of that story! Luv!
So as I’m standing at work I’m reading this installment. Couldn’t help but laugh as I’m reading it. I’ve got people just looking at me like what is wrong with her lol. These stories just keep getting better with reach one. I can’t wait for the next installment to find our what happens next. Keep you the good job Sean. Way to go keeping us in suspense.
Holy shit Sean, I’m loving this…..excited for part 4!!!!!!!!!!
You are a fucking riot! I cant take it, my side’s hurt I’m laughing so hard.
I am so looking forward to part 4. I fell kinda bad for Norman though, not bad enough to stop laughing, but there it is.
I was eating while I was reading this and a woman thought I was crying because I was laughing so hard that tears were pouring out of my eyes.
This is fucking hysterical and why Have I not seen this before
Better late than never!! And welcome!
Those damn green Skittles DO taste like Mr Clean!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You are an evil genius.
Omg anti spam started off with BJ!!!! Any Hoo ! I love this ,
I so look forward to the continuations of this story! I’m just glad that Boondock Saints is so emblazoned in my mind that I read this in your voices. Makes me laugh so hard and so awkwardly loud every time! Thank you!
Once again..too funny! This is hilarious!! But……can I just get some proof of this…”free styling” that you do? 😉
Oh my God! I seriously just peed a little! I fucking love your stories Sean!
OMFG! Laughed so hard I almost peed on the cat! No shit! Can’t wait for the next one…
Oh man, this just keeps getting better and better! After being smiled at by a creepy mall Santa, this just wraps up a creep induced day perfectly. Keep em coming…please!
This is epic and creative!…It would make a great mini series or movie!!! lol
I think I might have pee’d a little reading this hahaha pure hilarity
This shit is to funny. I’m picturing all this shit in my head and it sends my ass into hysterics.
People on the train are looking at me funny because I can’t stop laughing. After a long day auditing…this was the pick me up I needed. Thank you Mr Flannery. I eagerly await the next installment.
You, sir, are a gifted storyteller. Thank you for brightening my day!
Oh my God, this is fucking great! I’m so glad I found your blog. I must say that I’m really pulled into your writing. You have a real knack for telling a great story with just words. That’s a gift man and not many people have that gift. Major fucking kudos to you!!!! Can’t wait til’ the next part!
Thank you for the kind words!
OMG! I’m really starting to think he’s not the sharpest pencil in the box or you deserve an academy award!!!! You cannot tell me there was not substantial alcohol involved for him to be SO gullible LOL!
this is so friggen hilarious love your friendship you both have with each other hugz and love to the both of you
Omg Sean, my face hurts from laughing. Maybe I’m a fool to believe you, but I do, I can see this totally happening. I wish there was some kind of bedtime stories with flanery series.
Your killing me man. It’s like hilarious fan fiction by the hero himself!
Now that is some seriously funny shit and so sounds like something my family & I would do.
This is too fucking funny. I literally can’t. Each time it gets funnier and funnier. Looking forward to part 4!
This is so golden…. Can’t wait for more.
The rest in Reno! As if I needed another reason to be excited about going. See you there, Sean!
Sean, this is AMAZING. I read part 3 first so it was a little confusing but went back and read parts one and two and subscribed to your blog. Great read after a long work day. Keep up the good work of tormenting Norman. Hehehe.
“I LOVE THIS SHIT!!!!’
I seriously can’t get enough of this shiz! Omg!! XD
Oh yeah its gettin crazier I love it! this is some funny shiza!! cant wait for more XD Sean you are talented!! ^-^ HannahC^-^
Holy crappola that is some seriously funny stuff. You are genius my friend pure genius! I can’t wait to see how this plays out and am looking forward to more in Reno! #SPFRocksDaParty
I wasn’t sure you could get anymore sadistic, I was wrong, great job. I have giggled this much in a very long time. So thanks for that, and can’t wait for the next installment!
You are absolutely evil and I love it!
Keep up the good work sean cant wait for the next installment
These stories are so good, you know your spoiling us. We’re going to keep wanting more.
You sick fuck! Sean, you sick fuck!!!
Mean mother fucker!
That’s my bro in there, and if you hurt him this sister is going to kick your ass!! You see, I looked long and hard to find him, as he was switched at birth. I had to go through birth records, narrow the times, dates, places down to put two and two together. I bet you never knew he had a sister, well neither does he. Now, after all these years I find him the subject of your blog being emotionally tortured. If the Stein gets hurt in any way in the making of this blog, I’ll be coming for you!
You better lock your doors at night, sleep tight.
(PS. I may be joking, I may be serious… )
You never fail to surprise me. What a great blog, just found it and can’t wait for the rest. Great way to end the evening after a long night at work. 🙂
Started reading after I got up this morning And nearly forgot to wake up my son for school. Lol still made it in time though. Thanks for a great start to my day, can’t wait for the next part. Love from Germany. xo
Can I just say OMG. This just keeps getting better and better. Love it. Don’t stop writing !
Oh Captain! I’m loving this story! I loved when you read it to us in Tulsa (so much fun to watch you tell it in person). Seriously awesome! You need to write “Fucking with Reedus” stories all the time! I could live on it…lol. I can’t wait for the next part. You are the best! Much love and all that shit.
Water, and Fucking with Reedus…sounds like a great diet to me 🙂 Best diet EVAH!!
Will he be violated in a way unbecoming of a stein? Lol wow. And i must say, as awesome as this story is…its totally messing up my sexy hard ass image of norman reedus :/
Seriously. Flanery. You have to tell me exactly what combination of things the Stein drank. Just so I know what lethal concoction to avoid. So that my best friend doesn’t take advantage of me in such a way. Also regaling people with the story later.
This is just beyond hysterical. I’m laughing so hard I almost puked. Sean, If this is what you put your friends through, I would hate to be your enemy. Seriously, you could win wars with your Psy-ops! Absolutely Brilliant! I can’t wait for the next installment. Keep up the great writing, brother!
You are hilarious and the writing is inspired – nice add in of the Phil Collins reference there – hurry up with the next installment – this is my favourite thing about Monday right now lol…
the humor in this tale is just over the top, but I really admire the way you also have such an intensity in it that although it is humorous I still catch myself holding my breath as I read. You are in fact the only writer I have ever encountered that has done this. Great work! I look forward to more
Haven’t read anything that had me eagerly waiting for the next bit this much. Awesomeness. great piece of writing… Great inspiration for screwing with one’s friends 😉
This is really great. You should bring a video of each part! But I laughed a lot again
Seriously this should be a scene in the next Boondock Saints movie! Epic!!
HOLY HELL!!!! this is some seriously funny shit!!!! I LOVE IT!!!!
This is a sign of a true & strong friendship. I love how you keep it togehter as you pull this off. Bravo good sir Bravo.
Thank you for taking the time to interact and share your stories with all of us, whether it’s Reedus in a bathroom or your life lessons & encouragement, it is appreciated greatly, as much as we flatter you, we are flattered more, thanks again:)
Well, I really appreciate it. Thank you.
I couldn’t stop laughing when I saw the image of Reedus just chowing down on those M&M’s!! It’s perfect!!!
You are by far one of my favorite story tellers XD Isn’t Lucia Franciosa’s – The TheMeeDes (The Reedus Feinding) work truly talented. Love her.
LMFAO!! I LOVE this Sean. Seriously though, imagining you doing THIS to a good friend, I can only IMAGINE what you could do to an enemy LOL THAT would be a story worth picturing 🙂 Although, THIS is giving me goose bumps of exhilaration! Not to mention the laughing out loud at work is rather priceless!! 😉 Thanks again and bring on part 4 (Wish I could be in Reno! LOL).
OMFG!!! Sean this is EPIC!!! I can seriously picture this whole story playing out from the look of utter amusement on your face to sheer terror on Norman’s face!! Lmao!!! GOLDEN!!! You guys must make a mini movie with this, or even a whole movie!!! I would definitely watch!!! Thank you for this awesomeness!!
Read your story makes me feel so lucky ! You are an amazing guy ! Can’t wait to read what happen next. Thanks for sharing !
I’m officially dead … I laughed so hard I dropped my laptop … #Epic. .. I’m gonna need Flannery to post another short in my next book release … #FlanneryShouldWriteABook #NYTBestseller #LadyWoodForDays
Flanery! This is hilarious! Thanks so much for sharing this with us! Flandus for life
Well shit, that was awesome.
This is classic. I must remember to not read this at work. You are going to get me fired. I just made some strange noise, a mix between a laugh and a snort. Thankfully everyone seems to have ignored my outburst so I am typing here to look busy. Shh dont tell anyone.
Loved hearing you tell this story at Wizard World Tulsa!! I had to read it again – hilarious!! Can’t wait to read the conclusion!!
Pingback: Shine… until tomorrow. Norman Reedus Locked In A Bathroom?
OMG Poor Norman! I hope this didn’t really happen! But this is funny as hell and I will definitely keep reading ! I GOTTA KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TO REEDENSTEIN !! Don’t keep us waiting to Long !
Answers are forthcoming!
You, sir, are a miracle in the world of storytelling! Your use of words… my GOD! I can just see the scenarios unfolding in my mind as I read on! I could nearly bust a gut reading this! Thank you, for brightening up my morning!
Wait … is it too soon to start plotting some serious fanfiction here?!?!
Oh my god!! This is so amazing, I damn near pissed myself while scaring the dog with my laughter!! I can’t wait for the next part! XD
ADMIT IT!!!!!!! did you pee yourself from laughing so hard???
“FlannenBaum and ReedenStein”, the adventures or shall one say ‘misadventures’? Reads like a Grimm Tales, a scary build up with a helpless ‘hero’ who ends up trapped in the ‘wicked witches’ latrine and all afeared of what may be of those scary boots. -Had me holding onto my bootstraps until the next instalment. Thank you. Very good read and truly enjoyable. P.S. the illustrations with the story are beautiful! Please let the artists know they are appreciated.-Cheers
i Loooooove these! i can’t wait for more of this story aahahah
Hi to everyone from Hamburg Germany!
Sean, I came to your Blog, because I did not understand some posted comments about scary boots and such stuff on Facebook 😉 I took time to read all your Blog posts from the last two years! I love the way you find your words combined with pictures, artwork and excerpts. I is giving me the creeps and encourages a lot! Thank you so much for beeing an inspiration for everyone out there in this world and giving us such a big laughing with your new story! I am curious on what will happen next!
Hi to everyone from Hamburg Germany!
Sean, came to reading your blog, because I did not understand some posted comments about scary boots and such stuff on Facebook. I took time to read all your blog posts from the last two years! I love the way you find your words combined with pictures, artworks and excerpts. It is giving me tbe creeps and encourages a lot. Thank you for beeing an inspiration for everyone out there in this world and giving us such a big laughing with your new story. I am curious what will happen next.
BEST. STORY. EVER
LEAVES MY STORY OF PROJECT: DILDO THIEF IN SHAME!!
Make this a comic book!
Hahahaha hahahaha this is the best thing I have ever read! I so hope this actually happened. Hah got to love these guys lmao. If you made this is Flannery, you are that much more talented and amazing! Pleeease continue with this story, for as long as possible haha. Now I’m going to go through and read your other blog posts. Keep up the good work bro!
This is the most funniest thing I have EVER read!!!!! I absolutely LOVE you both. The worst part is I can actually see this really happening. Please don’t hold out any longer I’m ready to find out if Reedus is going to be “taken advantage of”.. 🙂
You are a bad, bad man; hilarious… but so naughty! Thx for the m&m trick
Can’t wait to find out what happens next!!!!
Such a great story! So excited to see what happens next!
When do we get part #4????? Having DT’s here!
stop the madness, you are killing me with this…lol. Great work Sean.
you truly are a good friend , that’s what buds do to each other…. fuck with them !!!!!
ROTFLMFAO for real, just love this, your blogs. I just come here, and read a way when I am having a shit day. You keep my spirits high, and always put a f’in smile on face, ALWAYS!!!!. Keep it up because I never want this shit to end. Oh yeah, can’t wait for the book either, totally looking forward to it. Many hugs to you dear, and keep shining 🙂
Oh my fucking god this is the most hilarious story I have heard in forever. U 2 remind me of my Dad before he settled down. Wow, so glad my kid is a sound sleeper, he definitely would be giving me the WTF look.
Brilliant!!! Can’t wait for the next chapter! I’m in stitches!
This is hilarious. Totally wish there had been more talking/hanging out when my friends and I met you guys way back at Horror Hound.
Fucking awesome. Hearing you read it out loud at the Tulsa Comic Con last week made it even better!
Brilliant! Why have I just now found this site? This made my otherwise crappy day at work so much better. Thank you for the much needed laugh and I can’t wait too read more.
Such a beautiful mind has the creator of all these flannanigans!
Flannanigans is my new favorite word this week. 😀
OMG. This is too fucking funny. I can’t wait for the next part. It makes my day at work!
My stomach hurt from trying not to laugh in a silent classroom. Thanks for shining up my day!
… sorry for the pun
I think this is the fifth or sixth time I’ve read these stories and I still laugh as hard as I did the first time I read them! Thank you for sharing these! I’m looking forward to reading part 4!
I love love love these stories!! They are frick ::) ng amazing! I even kinda like how you keep us waiting in suspense for a few days! Oh..Mr. f ??? Flanery…I’m really gonna need you to come to New Orleans comic con! I would love to meet you. Think about it please sir!
seriously this story is lame, and it shouldnt even have seen the light of day. This is suppose to be your friend and you are mocking him beyond anything, you claim you like to help people and make them SHINE wtf. putting down one of your friends is compleatly contradicting to the friendship…Sean I have lost what little respect i did or may have had for you. Keep doing what you are doing and i can assure you that many many more of your fans will drop you. Personally this story was lame, and totally uncalled for. no need to be jealous of norman, he doesnt insult you or act like you are a moron as you have made him look like….i truly thought you were a good guy, but you are obviously infulenced by the wrong type of fans that it has changed your personallity…..why of all people would you insult norman ??? you even mock him at cons. this is appauling behavoir…..we want the real SPF back not a sunny wanna be!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I hear absolutely everything you’ve said, but I’m not sure I agree with… well, any of it. But God bless anyway.
Your rad sean! this dude is over kill!
Totally agree with you! Baby ruckas, you need some shiny in your life 🙂 enjoy the humor in the story, and don’t judge the attitude behind it. It’s what our Sean wants 🙂
Well…Sean I guess I’m one of your ‘wrong’ fans cause I absolutely adore you & I love how you handle yourself when it comes to things like this, it actually shows how respectful you are. I love this story and I’m sure Norman has gotten a kick out of it too, anyone that is a true fan of you guys know your relationship and how you are truly like brothers. You’ve changed many lives with your encouragement and motivation, I come here alot just to read your blog when I need to be uplifted…keep up the great work, can’t wait for part 4….Never change. Much Love, God Bless & thanks again 😉
Sean you keep doing what your doing cause this story and your entire blog is just amazing! I hope you realize what an impact you make on people’s lives on my life! You sir are amazing thanks for making me smile and thanks for all you do! Much love and God Bless
That’s what I would call a major overreaction, Baby. Sean and Norman are brothers in everything but blood. This is starkly evident by everything they do and say to and about each other (that we have been privy to). Brothers mess with each other. It’s a pretty universal thing. But for most brothers, it’s done from a place of love and silliness and camaraderie, not bullying or disrespect and certainly not mockery.
I can’t say I agree at all with Baby_Rukas. This is how good guy friends should act. This story is hilarious and keeps getting better. It brightens my day knowing this level of good-natured tomfoolery exists. Gives me hope for future generations.
This is gold!!!!
It appears that Baby_ruckas is lacking in the shine department. I think everyone should send some shine to him/her.
Sean, keep doing what you’re doing. You’re great at it!!! Shine on!!!! ❤️❤️
Baby_ruckas probably just wanted attention for a comment man, and they got it, from SPF himself no less.
Ok, so does anyone else see that first picture and yell “HAAMIGAHD!” to themselves every time? Cracks me up!!!
SPF. If I have to wait one more day for the next part I’m going to track you down and strangle you!!!! BTW. You are the hotter brother in BDS. 🙂
Instead of M&M’s, I would of offered him skittles, and fucked with him about tasting a rainbow 🙂
Instead of M&M’s I would of hit Norm with some Skittles, and fraked with him to taste a rainbow….
Well Crap, double post. Time for me to get off the booze train, my bad….
Okay, I’m going to buy some Skittles and M&M’s now. 😀 Will be waiting for the end of the story eagerly. 😀
I’m lovin this! Cant wait to read the rest of it!! You guys are so awesome!! Love ya!!
Your adventures are superb and this round is slap knee hilarious. Thank you for sharing your stories. Cheers!
I freaking love this! I love you and norman yall are awesome actors and should be the stars of so many more movies. Cant wait to see BDS3! love you!! <3
Sadly, something very similar happened with my ex & myself one drunken night… LOVE THIS!
Your story is excellent. You are a great storyteller. Am looking forward to part the fourth. I’m curious how it goes with Norman in the bathroom!
Sean this story about Norman is flipping great and I couldn’t stop laughing while reading it! Plus I want to know what else you and your “scary” boots could do to freak out Norman! Hope to find out soon.
The kojak and magnum pi references were priceless! This has become family reading when another part is released. You make us laugh…and to think you made me cry watching Powder!! Keeper coming.
Sean !! Please Babe ! Part-4 I cant wait much longer !!!!
Uuuuuuuuugh, I need part 4, now. Stop teasing us Sean, for the love of God…..
NEED. INSTALLMENT. FOUR. NOW!!!!! It’s Monday, right???? C’mon, Sean!!! Set that goofy imagination to working!!!!
Omg….i was laughing so had I thought I was going to pee my pants! I cant wait to read part 4! Please hurry with it!
Sean, mi amor, I need to part 4. Please just do it! 🙂
Curious…why don’t you get Reedus to stop smoking?
Oh Captain, my Captain!! *gigglesnort* Oh my God!! I can’t wait to see how this turns out. By the way, I failed to follow the “Do not read this at work” advice and inhaled a wee bit of my coffee LMMFAO it was touch and go there for a while, but I made it!! hahahahahaha!! God love you cause I sure as hell do 😀
Absolutely love how you tell the stories! When will you end this misery of waiting for part 4!?
Hand drawn picture of boondock saints please check out Sean!!!!
Check out @NikkiWa17687967’s Tweet: https://twitter.com/NikkiWa17687967/status/535865559108583424?s=09
This is just the kind of shit my sister and I get into all the time. Keep posting Flanery! This is hilarious!
So glad pt4 will post tomorrow, but hate to see it end too, thanks for making these past few Mondays entertaining, perfect cure for the Monday blues….Can’t wait for your book….Thanks for everything you do 😉
LOVE LUV <3 this!!!!! Thanks so much for the laughs!!! Can't wait for the next one. You two are awesome!!!!! MUCH love and respect!! *Hugs* 🙂
AHAHAHAHAH i cant wait to see what else happens to damn funny love you guys update soon
Alright, my son and I were discussing this and here is our take……………… If this is NOT a true story, Sean, you have found your calling! You should be writing movies yourself! We are anxiously awaiting the next installment. After a hard days work, we all need a good laugh. Even if it is at Norman’s expense. LOVE YOU GUYS! PS. the ARTWORK rocks!
This needs to be made into a short film staring you and Reedus, I’m serious.
Also, had to come back an re-read, getting into finals week. Reading this makes me feel so much better 🙂
Dude!!! If this did happenit is hilarious! If it didn’t happen it’s still funny. Love this.
ah lord, I keep reading this to give me a smile thru my work night XD makes my shift go by with constant random giggling. Love it and you guys, you diabolical man you XD
You are the devil! I can actually see the experrisons on your faces.
You are an excellent writer. Does Norman read this?
You Rock, you sexy hunk!
Why thank you!
haha…Daryl Dixon locked in a bathroom traumatized by boots!
Sid to the rescue!
I smell a play. High-larious.
Oooooh… good idea.
Heh…you’re killing me. Reading this through again for the images since they didn’t appear on my phone and when I realized there were pictures I thought, “Oh, pictures could only make it funnier!” Anyways….At one point you write:
He can make due on the Pringles for all I care.
That should be “make do”, an idiom which is short for “make (insert noun) do well enough for (insert noun).”
The word “due” as a noun means obligatory payment or right. This causes the phrase “make due” to mean something totally different.
If this is too nit picky please ignore.
All the best
Due. Only due.